Most embarrassing moments during hobbying?

[Paprika]

1. Had a wet fart that stained the underwear right before the session, had to leave the underwear in the car trunk before going up the hotel room.

2. Dropped my underwear in the toilet by accident, had to put it my pocket when I left,

3. Had to take a dump and realized the toilet was really slow flushing, had to wait 5 minutes for the water to refill so I could flush again, then another 5 minutes to finish the job.

4. Forgot to trim a long nose hair, and it was sticking out and super itchy when trying to kiss the lady, I was unable to look at the lady in the eyes.

5. Visited an indy who's a college girl, and afterwards was told to take that plastic bag of used tissues and condoms and dispose of it.

6. Brushed my teeth but forgot to use toothpicks, and forgot to chew mint gum, so the lady accused me of bad breath, was told to brush twice, and she's still not happy.

7. Booked first appointment, was told to leave because that lady "wasn't comfortable", in reality she wanted to see her regular client, I later learned she had this black dude hiding somewhere in the condo as "security".

8. Corned by the pimp who extorted almost $300 from me after a bad session that never happened.

9. The lady was a total trashy drug whore...and I didn't know why I stayed and banged her twice...

10. First time seeing an SP, she's old with really flabby skin, dark nipples, couldn't get hard at all, and never saw an escort again until 3 years later...

11. Couldn't get hard because I got turned off by the veins on this lady's breasts, and she laughed at me.

 

[MarcoHardOnFire]

Walked into a session and it was a chick I knew in high school.

Was helping pull the condom off (girl had long nails and my man-forest was rolled into the base of the rubber) while the girl knelt in front of me; it came of like a rubber band and flung the contents into her eye.

 

[black booty lover]

3. Had to take a dump and realized the toilet was really slow flushing, had to wait 5 minutes for the water to refill so I could flush again, then another 5 minutes to finish the job.

Something similar happened to me once. Like I always do, made sure bowels were empty at home before session. The session was in a shitty run down motel in Scarborough (no pun intended) where the door to the bathroom barley closed and the toilette barely worked. The SP starts to massage me as she was my regular and we always started with a massage. About 10 minutes into the massage, my stomach isn't feeling great and I have to excuse myself and tell her I need to use the bathroom. Jesus H Christ it was one of the worst case of shits I ever had. I was in there for about 15 minutes blasting away and as mentioned, it was tiny motel room with a door that didn't even really close properly. I did like 6 curtesy flushes but the toilette was so slow it didn't do anything. The whole fucking motel room smelled like a sewer. Literally one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. I have no idea how she kept a straight face after and continued like she didn't smell anything or practically vomit. That room must of reeked until we left it was that bad.

 

[MarcoHardOnFire]

In Vegas one time, walking down the strip, and it hits me that I have to offload right NOW. Run up the stairs into a little food court bathroom near the M and M store. All the stalls are full and I hold it as long as I can; I can’t any longer and there is some significant output, luckily all contained in my underwear. Stalls are still full, but urinals are not, and luckily they are full length all the way down to the floor. I slide my shorts down, aim my ass into a urinal and release the hounds. It was an explosive decompression, and hence over quickly. Stall opens up, dude comes out, looks at me, looks away and walks out, no doubt thinking “What happens in Vegas, stays in …”. Other dudes in the room are like “???” but everyone is cool, thank God no one got out a cell phone. I whip into the stall, remove my underwear (which were write offs), clean up as best as possible, then head back downstairs, tell my buddy “I sharted, gotta head back to my room for clean underwear, be back in 40 minutes” which I proceed to do. We spend the rest of the night wondering the strip getting hammered and with me hitting the bathroom every twenty minutes. I end the night by going back to my room and blowing a load in Katy Perry at 5am (Katy Perry is what I named my right hand).

 

[kherg007]

Early in my career, was nervous expecting an outcall to my hotel room. Gut gets a bit argy bargy, about 20 mins before her scheduling arrival time...started to panic thinking what if...and what if the olfactory "evidence" is still lingering about when she arrives? Then it dawned on me I could go to the hotel ground floor loo, which calmed me down alot, including the stomach all together, thus no storm arrived.
BTW, if I'm hosting an outcast it's usually 90 mins and I await her arrival, offer her a shower, then I have one. In the early days always tried to time shower to her arrival and often they run late and it just adds a more stress than need be. Rather lose 5 mins and not stress, so just wait until she arrives. I think that gives her additional confidence too. Nowadays outcalls will mainly be a reg.

However most embarrasing moment was on a Sunday, the now defunct naughty nuru agency was closed, but my fave lady was willing to come in just for me and so they opened up the condo and I had booked her 2 hours. Then, i couldn't find my cash! I was panicked, thinking she must be thinking I've got her alone and I'm scamming her, etc etc. I searched every pocket, I'm super embarrassed, she seemed calm, but I'm not. After 10 mins I find an obscure pocket in my new jacket and forgot I jammed the cash there. Whew.

 

[Kusa]

The first time anxiety took the better of me resulting in "mechanical malfunction". The SP was really good at accepting the challenges I faced and did mention that it happens more often that we think. In fact at one time the client got mad at her for his inability inspite of her repeated efforts to the the little guy to salute.

 

[unassuming]

Was having a great session with SP at incall, I decided to extend session, but did not have extra cash, SP let me go to nearby ATM for the the extra lettuce, said I'll be right back in just a few minutes. When I got back , I knocked on door , no answer, repeated several times, no answer, I then tried the door and it was open, looked inside and the place was empty! Realized I was on wrong floor, finally found the right apt. I explained to her what happened and apologized for taking longer, we had a good laugh, continued session.

 

[SexB]

I reunited with a lady I used to see regularly and had a bit of ... performance anxiety.

Wasn't really embarrassing but when we used to see each other, she sneezed while she was giving me a BJ. We both got a good laugh out of it.

At the opposite end, with one lady I saw a few times I'd always ... pull the trigger too quickly. She was completely understanding about it, even telling me she found it to be flattering since it showed how much she turned me on but she did gently suggest that I try to have some ... "alone time" either the night before or the morning of the next time we got together. I didn't get to put this to the test as she retired shortly after that.

When to do CIM on one lady and ended up giving her an accidental facial when it ... went long. Again, we got a good laugh out of it.

It wasn't embarrassing so much as it was alarming but one lady I used to see decided to use Kimono condoms one time we got together and one ended up breaking. But wait, it gets better! It broke right when I came. She said she was on birth control and we both got tested regularly so there were no surprises and we were able to joke about it the next time we got together.

 

[Darts]

Realized I was on wrong floor, finally found the right apt.

One time the agency phone guy sent me to the wrong room.

A hairy guy opened the door.
Me: Is Lola here?
Hairy guy: You got the wrong room (with a bit of a smile).

 

[Indiana]

None. But probably some poop stories

 

[massman]

One time the agency phone guy sent me to the wrong room.

A hairy guy opened the door.
Me: Is Lola here?
Hairy guy: You got the wrong room (with a bit of a smile).

Agency sent me to the wrong building once.

 

[Paprika]

Agency sent me to the wrong building once.

I forgot, agency sent me to the wrong city...that's with Raven's agency Courtesan Escorts, they sent me to a hotel in Kitchener, then before appointment I found out it's in Cambridge, then I drove to that location...the guy asked me if he could help, I gave him the room number, he swore the room is unoccupied, that's when I realized I again entered another hotel which was next door.

 

[massman]

I forgot, agency sent me to the wrong city...that's with Raven's agency Courtesan Escorts, they sent me to a hotel in Kitchener, then before appointment I found out it's in Cambridge, then I drove to that location...the guy asked me if he could help, I gave him the room number, he swore the room is unoccupied, that's when I realized I again entered another hotel which was next door.

 

[smart_alek]

Walked into a session and it was a chick I knew in high school.

Was helping pull the condom off (girl had long nails and my man-forest was rolled into the base of the rubber) while the girl knelt in front of me; it came of like a rubber band and flung the contents into her eye.

How was the session with the highschool chick?

 

[jalimon]

I knock on the door but i hear a strong voice saying its open... I open the door and see that the blonde thin spinner with big boobs on the picture is actually a massive overweight girl that scared the shit out of me

i dropped 20$ on the floor said I'm sorry and ran to my car faster then olympic 100m gold winner !

 

[Greytop19]

Was having a great session with SP at incall, I decided to extend session, but did not have extra cash, SP let me go to nearby ATM for the the extra lettuce, said I'll be right back in just a few minutes. When I got back , I knocked on door , no answer, repeated several times, no answer, I then tried the door and it was open, looked inside and the place was empty! Realized I was on wrong floor, finally found the right apt. I explained to her what happened and apologized for taking longer, we had a good laugh, continued session.

Nice story....thanks

 

[Darts]

Agency sent me to the wrong building once.

There is at least one probably more agencies that have multiple locations. It's understandable a busy phone guy/woman can get mixed up. But, it's a shock when you are expecting "Lola" and a hairy man answers the door. LOL!

 

[jalimon]

I have another one which i swear is a discussion that really happened...

I am in doggy pounding as best as i can. I take a break.

Her: Did you came?
Me: No and you?
Her: No

 

[MarcoHardOnFire]

How was the session with the highschool chick?

Very Short.

 

[knees]

my first SP experience was with a legendary SP in the mid 2000s when she just turned indie from an agency that rhymes with frog . Her incall was at a busy condo just south of Bloor. It was early evening so there were quite a number of people going in and out. Being a complete dumb newbie, I didn't buzz in and just followed into the building. I knocked on the door, she opened and I could hear her speaking to another John who was just leaving. She was quick on her feet, turned back the guy, let me in and hid me in the bathroom by the entrance (thank god the bathroom was by the door). She let the other guy out and I apologized profusely. She was a total sweatheart and didn't mind at all and started the DFK attack. She is still working today so you older gents can probably guess who she is.