Manipulation and other toxic behaviors.
Everyone has the right to a voice, we shouldn’t remove anyone’s voice as this would basically be returning them the ostracization. It is however important to call out these behaviors when we encounter them, mostly to inform the readers of the impacts of these behaviors, but also to prevent the writers to use them unknowingly. By calling out a toxic behaviors, we give everyone a chance to do better in the future.
Anyone should be careful when calling out toxic behaviours in person as some people using them have the tendency to become violent when they are exposed and might turn to physicality to gain back control over the situation.
Not every manipulators are narcissists, sociopaths or psychopaths. Some people have been through various traumas and conditioning. Gender conformity is a trauma example that both binary genders (men and women) and non-binary genders tend to face by the fear of not being “man enough”, “woman enough” or "anything enough" really. A lot of other societal conditioning will cause traumas in masses and we don’t necessarily realize it as this conditioning is fully normalized.
( https://sites.bu.edu/ombs/2015/10/14/fear-conditioning-and-ptsd/ )
Manipulators are scared to be confronted, they will most likely over react to try to get out of the situation without having to explain their behaviors. They might not even realize that they are doing it, but they have a goal and anything is fair game for them in achieving it.
Engaging with manipulators is a tough challenge. The trick is to not let the conversation be directed towards their traps and bringing back the original topics everytime they try to bring one of their toxic behaviours in.
( https://www.inc.com/jessica-stillma...ed-by-manipulators-and-how-to-fight-them.html )
Everyone has the right to a voice, we shouldn’t remove anyone’s voice as this would basically be returning them the ostracization. It is however important to call out these behaviors when we encounter them, mostly to inform the readers of the impacts of these behaviors, but also to prevent the writers to use them unknowingly. By calling out a toxic behaviors, we give everyone a chance to do better in the future.
Anyone should be careful when calling out toxic behaviours in person as some people using them have the tendency to become violent when they are exposed and might turn to physicality to gain back control over the situation.
Not every manipulators are narcissists, sociopaths or psychopaths. Some people have been through various traumas and conditioning. Gender conformity is a trauma example that both binary genders (men and women) and non-binary genders tend to face by the fear of not being “man enough”, “woman enough” or "anything enough" really. A lot of other societal conditioning will cause traumas in masses and we don’t necessarily realize it as this conditioning is fully normalized.
( https://sites.bu.edu/ombs/2015/10/14/fear-conditioning-and-ptsd/ )
Manipulators are scared to be confronted, they will most likely over react to try to get out of the situation without having to explain their behaviors. They might not even realize that they are doing it, but they have a goal and anything is fair game for them in achieving it.
“The goal of all manipulation is to gain influence to get our needs met, but habitual manipulators do so for power and control and use deceptive and abusive methods. Manipulators maintain domination through continuous, recurring, emotional manipulation, abuse, and coercive control. Often they’re passive-aggressive. They may lie or act caring or hurt or shocked by your complaints — all to deflect any criticism and to continue to behave in an unacceptable manner. “
“Manipulation may include overt aggression, such as criticism, narcissistic abuse, and subtle forms of emotional abuse. Favorite covert weapons of manipulators are: guilt, complaining, comparing, lying, denying, feigning ignorance or innocence (e.g.“Who me!?”), blame, bribery, undermining, mind games, assumptions, “foot-in-the-door,” reversals, emotional blackmail, evasiveness, forgetting, inattention, fake concern, sympathy, apologies, flattery, and gifts and favors. “
“Manipulators want to avoid being confronted and taking responsibility at all costs. They may avoid conversations about their behavior by simply refusing to discuss it. This might be combined with an attack, like, “You’re always nagging me,” putting you on the defensive with blame, guilt, or shame “
( https://psychcentral.com/lib/tactics-manipulators-use-to-win-and-confuse-you/ )
“Manipulation may include overt aggression, such as criticism, narcissistic abuse, and subtle forms of emotional abuse. Favorite covert weapons of manipulators are: guilt, complaining, comparing, lying, denying, feigning ignorance or innocence (e.g.“Who me!?”), blame, bribery, undermining, mind games, assumptions, “foot-in-the-door,” reversals, emotional blackmail, evasiveness, forgetting, inattention, fake concern, sympathy, apologies, flattery, and gifts and favors. “
“Manipulators want to avoid being confronted and taking responsibility at all costs. They may avoid conversations about their behavior by simply refusing to discuss it. This might be combined with an attack, like, “You’re always nagging me,” putting you on the defensive with blame, guilt, or shame “
( https://psychcentral.com/lib/tactics-manipulators-use-to-win-and-confuse-you/ )
Engaging with manipulators is a tough challenge. The trick is to not let the conversation be directed towards their traps and bringing back the original topics everytime they try to bring one of their toxic behaviours in.
( https://www.inc.com/jessica-stillma...ed-by-manipulators-and-how-to-fight-them.html )
