I was with you right up until you told me that she was with someone else.... WTF.. is she using your money to take her boyfriend out to dinner???The Bandit said:Oh yeah story of my life, I've been burned for over $15,000 over the years. I also have a friend who's on the hook right now for like another $5,300, but I adore her so much that I don't let the money come between our friendship(yeah she's with someone else).
Loaning money to friends
- Thread starter dukeelton
- Start date
Get in line buddy... Ruck and I are already lifelong friends.....WhaWhaWha said:Ruck I'm feeling very close to you right now. Wanna be lifetime friends
re:
My belief is never lend a friend money. I don't care how in need or trust worthy they are. The point is I never ask a friend for anything and never would. I expect the same in return. You can get yourself into trouble lending out money. For me it goes to the extreme I don't even let people borrow anything off me. They know not to ask because my response would be telling them off. I learned along time ago when people ask you for things they are leaches. They keep your money or stuff and hope you don't ask for it back. It's best to keep your money and stuff to yourself. If they try and play a guilt trip on you,tell them to fuck off. That's what I always do. The ones who use guilt trips are for the most part are not your friends anyways. I've never said to a friend can I borrow money or can I borrow that. If some one wants to borrow money go to the bank. That's what they are there for.
My belief is never lend a friend money. I don't care how in need or trust worthy they are. The point is I never ask a friend for anything and never would. I expect the same in return. You can get yourself into trouble lending out money. For me it goes to the extreme I don't even let people borrow anything off me. They know not to ask because my response would be telling them off. I learned along time ago when people ask you for things they are leaches. They keep your money or stuff and hope you don't ask for it back. It's best to keep your money and stuff to yourself. If they try and play a guilt trip on you,tell them to fuck off. That's what I always do. The ones who use guilt trips are for the most part are not your friends anyways. I've never said to a friend can I borrow money or can I borrow that. If some one wants to borrow money go to the bank. That's what they are there for.
My experience is once you start lending money, some people take it for granted, and then start using you as their own bank, some pay back and others figure if you had it in the first place, you probably don't need it that bad.
I used to have a cap amount. I would only led 100.00 and no more. If you it padi it back the amount might go up for you. Now I just give everyone the same answer, no. No I don't give out smokes, i don't led money, I don't give rides. I don't. If they don't like it, it is not my fault.
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It is better to give than recieve
Having been able to loan money to many of my friends and family over the years, I always just moralize it as follows:
1. They money is not s loan - it is a gift, so I don't expect it back.
2. Depending on the amount, I will "purchase" something from them, ie. tv, bike, etc. and "sell" it back to them when they give me the money.
3. Offer to pay the "interested" party directly, usually stops the bullshit loans.
Having been able to loan money to many of my friends and family over the years, I always just moralize it as follows:
1. They money is not s loan - it is a gift, so I don't expect it back.
2. Depending on the amount, I will "purchase" something from them, ie. tv, bike, etc. and "sell" it back to them when they give me the money.
3. Offer to pay the "interested" party directly, usually stops the bullshit loans.
I agree with some of the above. If you can afford to GIVE the money, give it. Insist you don't need it paid back, that you're friends, and some day the favour will be returned. A lot of people will pay you back anyway, either in cash or some other way.
If you don't make it a gift then if they can't pay it back it gets awkward. They will sweat about whether they are screwing you, and you will resent their not paying it, even if neither of you says anything.
If you don't make it a gift then if they can't pay it back it gets awkward. They will sweat about whether they are screwing you, and you will resent their not paying it, even if neither of you says anything.
Old German proverb:
Never lend any money, your car or your wife to a friend, unless you want to end the friendship.
Never lend any money, your car or your wife to a friend, unless you want to end the friendship.
That's exactly how I feel towards the issue and only wish that friends would share the same view. In reality, most of them just didn't/don't get it.bkspoiler11 said:
I still lend out money for extreme emergency situations, but the days of " you ask for $ 300 ? Here you go , take 300 " are long gone. As a fellow terbite mentioned,
" Don't lend it if you can't afford to lose "
This is a great thread BTW.
I have no problem lending or borrowing certain possessions, what's the point in both of us owning snowblowers or tablesaws?
But lending more than a couple of dollars for some reason usually makes me uncomfortable. That's what the impersonal line of credit is for.
But lending more than a couple of dollars for some reason usually makes me uncomfortable. That's what the impersonal line of credit is for.
Considering I've never met either of you guys, the answer is a no.
My life long friends have done more for me, without money involved, than my cash can do for them. I'm a man of principles. If I've been treated kindly by someone for no apparent reason but to sincerely help, then that person has gained my trust until they lose it through a malicious act.
That, in a nutshell, are my life long friends.
My life long friends have done more for me, without money involved, than my cash can do for them. I'm a man of principles. If I've been treated kindly by someone for no apparent reason but to sincerely help, then that person has gained my trust until they lose it through a malicious act.
That, in a nutshell, are my life long friends.
Friends and money don't mix
That is one phrase that I remember being told as a child. I have subsequently found that it is generally true.
I have occassionally loaned the odd $20.00 over the years but I don't lend any large sums.
I did lend a friend $800.00 plus some spending money to go on a trip to Cuba five years ago. It was a great trip, got some great action with the Chica's.
I have not been paid back to this day but I don't really care as the loan still stands and it is a great excuse not to loan any more money to my perpetually broke friend.
That is one phrase that I remember being told as a child. I have subsequently found that it is generally true.
I have occassionally loaned the odd $20.00 over the years but I don't lend any large sums.
I did lend a friend $800.00 plus some spending money to go on a trip to Cuba five years ago. It was a great trip, got some great action with the Chica's.
I have not been paid back to this day but I don't really care as the loan still stands and it is a great excuse not to loan any more money to my perpetually broke friend.
