Life-changing revelation!!

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stinkynuts

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Jan 4, 2005
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True story. I was walking home and stopped at the grocery store which is close by. As I was leaving, a homeless man asked me for some change. I didn't want to give him any, but didn't want to appear cheap either. I just kind of shrugged and raised both hands, each hand carrying a grocery bag. He nodded as if he understood, and left. It was an excellent excuse not to give him any money, and saved me from looking like a bad person.

It reminded me of a "Deep Thought" by Jack Handey :


"To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, 'Hey, can you give me a hand?' You can say, 'Sorry, got these sacks.' "
 
Funny. I just say no. Considering all of the social services available in the city and country there is no reason for anyone to be out on the street.

I'm good with paying the taxes to help people. But I have in my time had to work multiple jobs and put up with a lot of shit to get where I am. I've been down and just about out. I won't enable by giving cash.
 
Butler1000 said:
Funny. I just say no. Considering all of the social services available in the city and country there is no reason for anyone to be out on the street.

I'm good with paying the taxes to help people. But I have in my time had to work multiple jobs and put up with a lot of shit to get where I am. I've been down and just about out. I won't enable by giving cash.
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cheap
 
canada-man said:
what do you mean by that?
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cheap trick. Why not just say no or sorry or just ignore. Why do you need an excuse to run from the situation. Just fucking be a man about it look them straight in the eye and say no, sorry or just ignore if it is the appropriate thing to do.
 
I'm reluctant to give money to someone who's going to turn around and go to the liquor store or go and buy some after shave, or who's after their next fix. Lots of social services here, as compared to other countries.
 
Actually there are some major gaps. Medication even life saving medication is not covered by OHIP until you have spend the last dollar out of your back account and have no assets to sell. There are some MAJOR gaps in our social net.
The other issues is that you can no longer help mental ill people by force even if there mental illness prevents from getting help.
 
danmand would have given him one of his open faced herring sandwiches.
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True story. When I was younger, I was walking through the Eaton Center, before those Third Generation Losers finally bankrupted the place.

Walked by the fountain. On the floor, was $3 whole dollars! Holy shit! I bend over and pick them up. Wohoo!

Then I look around, and see the people sitting there, on the ledge of the fountain, only about 10 to 15 feet away. There were just sitting. No one saw the $3 on the ground. That was $3 in bills, so how can they miss that.

The point is, those people sitting there, were the type that were always asking for money on the street. There was the money right in front of them, and they did nothing. I beat them to those $3.

What the hell. These homeless types, always asking for money. Yet here it was right in front of them and they did nothing.

After that, never really felt like giving anymore. What's the point. These people too lazy or too broken to even bother to pick $3 off the floor.
 
I'm always polite (at first) but still say no. There are plenty of more productive ways for my donations to benefit the needy, usually amounting to several thousand a year to local charities. It is sad that some of the 'homeless' are neither homeless or incapable of work but simply find begging to be easier and more productive. And I always wonder about the ones in front of the liquor store. Are they hoping that you will feel guilty after spending money on booze or are they hoping you don't automatically think their first stop will be inside.

Plenty of people have real need but except in a very few cases, giving them a couple bucks won't change anything.

The ones I feel the worst for are the ones who are obviously mentally ill but the medical system isn't set up to provide them with the care they need. Instead they rush them out of hospitals as quick as possible or just try and dope them up. CAMH has some good programs but there is no way for them to reach everyone in need.
 
danmand said:
cheap
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Not at all. My wife and I give a goodly amount to a variety of causes. A few in memorandum of family lost to diseases. An animal shelter. Various runs, walks etc as friends and family request sponsorship. We also give books etc to libraries. Donate to food banks. And supply time and effort to two small but worthy fundraisers.

and all of them are properly Vetted and do good work. I we know WHERE the money is going for the most part. And that is just as important.
 
First let me say that I do give a lot to charity, primarily MSF and the Red Cross. I also not only pay a lot of tax but I consistently vote increase to my taxes, in order to support better social programs. Happy to support free education, free healthcare, OAS, CPP, EI, etc.

But I don't give a cent to homeless and I don't give a cent to the charities that enable them.

Here's the harsh reality: these people a lost cause. They are not worth investing in.

We as a society failed them. We ought to have intervened earlier. Kept them in school. Helped them avoid getting into drugs. Helped them avoid getting into crime.

We should have, buy we didn't, and now they fucked up beyond hope. (Some are just mentally ill but note that the mentally ill actually get a lot of funding and benefits already, money isn't their problem.)

Better to invest in kids and prevent the next generation of homeless. There's hope for kids
 
fuji said:
First let me say that I do give a lot to charity, primarily MSF and the Red Cross. I also not only pay a lot of tax but I consistently vote increase to my taxes, in order to support better social programs. Happy to support free education, free healthcare, OAS, CPP, EI, etc.

But I don't give a cent to homeless and I don't give a cent to the charities that enable them.

Here's the harsh reality: these people a lost cause. They are not worth investing in.

We as a society failed them. We ought to have intervened earlier. Kept them in school. Helped them avoid getting into drugs. Helped them avoid getting into crime.

We should have, buy we didn't, and now they fucked up beyond hope. (Some are just mentally ill but note that the mentally ill actually get a lot of funding and benefits already, money isn't their problem.)

Better to invest in kids and prevent the next generation of homeless. There's hope for kids
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How about just showing them a bit of kindness and make them feel good for a moment or two, or maybe a smile for the rest of the day?
 
Jubee said:
How about just showing them a bit of kindness and make them feel good for a moment or two, or maybe a smile for the rest of the day?
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Your intentions are good but your actions in many cases result in further financing a substance abuse problem. Many panhandlers are physically and mentally ill, receive welfare cheques or government disability support through community social services. Their rent is paid directly to the landlord, no cash is giving to them to support their drug habit so they beg for cash. These professional beggars often work in teams, pooling their donations at the end of their shift to buy drugs and alcohol. There is a team working the off ramp of the highway that I have seen over the years. One female in the gang was quite attractive before and I have observed her deterioration over the years and she is said to perform sex acts with fellow panhandlers in exchange for meth and crack. It should be made illegal to give cash to panhandlers. There are other ways to help but this form of altruism is naive and irresponsible.
 
Its a complex issue.
 
When Henry's had their 100th anniversary giveaway, I lined up in the queue with a thousand other people (I was probably 100th in line). I got tired of just standing there and waiting and waiting. Then I saw this homeless guy going through garbage looking for whatever. I offered him $5 to stand in line for me. He said "no".
 
I have had positive and negative experiences giving on the street.

It won't stop me from giving tho, and I tend to try to give them food rather than money.
 
I too give significant amounts to charities, with cash donations to the food bank as well, but am reluctant to give cash to people who panhandle. Many are capable of earning more than a few bucks if they are motivated or (hungry) enough. It particularly bothers me when they have a dog with them. If you can't support yourself, why take on a pet?

If they are young and able bodied they can cut grass, paint houses, shovel snow (as I have done the past), but I'm a little surprised to see some members here who cannot generate a little compassion for those who are clearly suffering from mental issues, as so many are. If you can help someone who cannot help themselves, why not do something?

I certainly don't mean to preach. Again, I find the majority of those who panhandle to be obnoxious losers (as much as I hate that terminology), but I taught my kids to have empathy for those who cannot help themselves. Giving a couple of bucks to someone in need just might be rewarding....
 
dawnlee said:
you call realizing you could use this gesture to avoid giving change a 'life-changing revelation?' when i clicked on the thread title, i was expecting something way more... substantive.
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Yes, that's a pretty inciteful comment, dawnlee. If there was a life changing incident here, it was not the act of walking away from somone in need...
 
You have to be aware when you are being played by some of these street people. They use people to get what they want. Do they want money for food or do they want it for booze or drugs? I saw two young people begging outside a restaurant and they wanted money for food. I offered to give them lunch inside, but they refused. On another occasion I saw this old guy rooting through the garbage outside a fast food place. He did not ask, but I gave him a few bucks. When I was making my purchase inside I purchased an extra meal with coffee. When I gave it to the old guy I told him to eat it inside and he could get milk and sugar for his coffee. I do not think I have given out too much hand out money for booze or drugs.
 
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