Let's try and maintain a level of sanity

[Mod100]

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of In sanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With
Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer
At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. On all your cheque stubs, write ' For Marijuana'

3. Skip down the street Rather Than Walk and see how many looks
you get.

4. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat,with a serious face.

5. Sing Along At The Opera.

6. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

7. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Car Park, Yelling 'Run
For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

8. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy,
We are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity

9. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER
AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.

 

[dirkd101]

I like those, thanks. I have used a variation of number 8 a few times, I'll tell one of mine that they just aren't working out anymore so I may try and send you back or get a replacement. It gets a chuckle every time.

 

[Questor]

Thanks. I got a good laugh out of those.

 

[HOF]

That made my day!

I'd add to the condom fitting could you help me test it out!

 

[peter4025]

Good one!

 

[Hurricane Hank]

I do like saying "that was the biggest rat I've ever seen" when exiting a nice restaurant, and passing people who are entering.

 

[Vixens]

On my way up north for a caming trip i stopped at canadian tire to buy a hatchet. I stood in line impatiently waiting because i knew thatbtraffic was mounting by the second. When it was finally my turn to pay i looked mildly insane. When the cashier asked if i wanted a bag i said no im going to be using it shortly.

 

[Tdot'sFinest]

LOL. Those were damn funny!

Thanks for the chuckle!

 

[FatOne]

I am tempted to try the water thing, but I find when you get weird, you just confuse people.

Also go to a McDs and tell them you are in the mood for a good burger and ask where the nearest Burger King is.
Ask someone if they can keep a secret, and when they say yes, tell them that you can also and walk away.


But meh Sanity is highly overrated.


Phn'glui mglw'nafh Chthulhu R'lyeh wagn'nagl fhtagn

 

[mila]

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of In sanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With
Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer
At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. On all your cheque stubs, write ' For Marijuana'

3. Skip down the street Rather Than Walk and see how many looks
you get.

4. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat,with a serious face.

5. Sing Along At The Opera.

6. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

7. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Car Park, Yelling 'Run
For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

8. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy,
We are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity

9. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER
AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.

I love this!! I can't stop smiling!

 

[spraggamuffin]

Lol. Good Ones.

Serenity Now. Insanity Later - Lloyd Braun -Seinfeld

 

[basketcase]

When a clerk asks me what size (coffee, shirt or whatever) I order an "Extra Medium" .

When they look puzzled, I say "Just a little more medium than medium".

Very few get it...

You'd like this product then.
http://www.lightmyfire.com/products/wild-kitchen-collection/spork/spork-extra-medium.aspx

 

[Conway_Stewart]

On my way up north for a caming trip i stopped at canadian tire to buy a hatchet. I stood in line impatiently waiting because i knew thatbtraffic was mounting by the second. When it was finally my turn to pay i looked mildly insane. When the cashier asked if i wanted a bag i said no im going to be using it shortly.

LMAO...reminds me of this: