Let's hear some cheesy pickup lines
- Thread starter Karma
- Start date
Y
yychobbyist
Holy Christ man, do you have a list of these next to your door so you can check them before heading out the door at night.stugotsms said:1. I wish you were a door so I could slam you all day.
2. Nice legs...what time do they open?
3. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.
4. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?
5. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
6. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.
7. I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher. Have you seen one?
8. I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.
9. Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.
10. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.
11. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag.
12. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.
13. Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?
14. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
15. Are those real?
16. You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.
17. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.
18. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.
19. (Look down at your crotch) Well, it's not just going to suck itself.
20. You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.
21. You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?
22. Fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Helga Titsbottom?
23. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
24. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
25. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
26. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
27. My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute.
28. Hi. The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.
29. My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.
30. I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?
31. If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.
32. Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why? Don't you like pizza?
34. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go home without me.
35. Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I???
36. Do you wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.
37. I lost my puppy. Can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
38. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.
One for the next time in a massage parlor and see a MPA running in the halls.
"Excuse me, can I borrow your towel? My car hit a water buffalo" - National Lampoon
Some random Thoughts...
"I love your eyes, but that wasn't the first thing I noticed about you"
"Can I have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine"
"If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"
"Your legs sure know how to make an ass of themselves"
"you must have had a hard time getting into those tight jeans, mind if I try getting into them?"
"Excuse me, can I borrow your towel? My car hit a water buffalo" - National Lampoon
Some random Thoughts...
"I love your eyes, but that wasn't the first thing I noticed about you"
"Can I have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine"
"If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"
"Your legs sure know how to make an ass of themselves"
"you must have had a hard time getting into those tight jeans, mind if I try getting into them?"
longfirmleggss said:is that all you men can come up with?
ya poor buggers...it needs work
annalee
It's not the steak, it's the sizzle. It's not about the content of your presentation but how you present it. Cheese works ladies. Not all the time, but most of the time. Women in bars generally tune out most of what men say. I find that most (present company excluded of course) women are into looks and confidence.
So next time you mention angels, the stars or whatever, make sure the delivery is spot on. Practise it. If its tacky, inject it with witt and a ton of humour. And at just the moment your charm has caught hold of her...whip it out.
I actually, honestly once had someone ask me what my 'sign' was.
I told him that if I had a sign, it would say 'asshole free zone', so could he please move the fuck away. Needless to say, I didn't score any free drinks out of him.
I told him that if I had a sign, it would say 'asshole free zone', so could he please move the fuck away. Needless to say, I didn't score any free drinks out of him.
I know milk does a body good, but damn how much have you been drinking?
are you a parking ticket cuz you have FINE written all over you
Is you dad a theif because i think he stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
I'm not good at these pick up lines, so can i just play with your boobs??
Wanna come over for pizza and sex? no? don't you like pizza?
are you a parking ticket cuz you have FINE written all over you
Is you dad a theif because i think he stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
I'm not good at these pick up lines, so can i just play with your boobs??
Wanna come over for pizza and sex? no? don't you like pizza?
This isn't exactly a pickup line but I have actually used it from time to time:
Me: Excuse me, would you like to dance.....???
She: Ummm NOOOO
Me: NO? umm I said "you're a little too big for those PANTS"!!!
me: tickle your *unt with a feather?
She: WHAT did you SAY??????
Me: Typical country weather.......!!!
Me: Excuse me, would you like to dance.....???
She: Ummm NOOOO
Me: NO? umm I said "you're a little too big for those PANTS"!!!
me: tickle your *unt with a feather?
She: WHAT did you SAY??????
Me: Typical country weather.......!!!
He: Are you married?
She: Yes. ("No" is OK, too)
He: Do you fuck around?
She: No.
He: Mind holding still while I do?
Perry
She: Yes. ("No" is OK, too)
He: Do you fuck around?
She: No.
He: Mind holding still while I do?
Perry
If you were a tear in my eye, I would not cry for the fear of losing you. . .
Can I check the label on your shirt? I want to see if your "Made in Heaven". . .
Is your dad a "Baker" by any chance? (She says why)? Because you have some nice buns on you. . .
Would you like to dance?...(If she says no)....Tell her, sorry I said you look FAT in those PANTS...(can we have that dance now?)
Can I check the label on your shirt? I want to see if your "Made in Heaven". . .
Is your dad a "Baker" by any chance? (She says why)? Because you have some nice buns on you. . .
Would you like to dance?...(If she says no)....Tell her, sorry I said you look FAT in those PANTS...(can we have that dance now?)
