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IfYouSeekAmy shows me a thing or two.......

Cardinal Fang

Bazinga Bitches
Feb 14, 2002
6,577
467
83
I'm right here
www.vatican.va
*Ladies and gentlemen the review you are about to read is true. Only the names and certain aspects of the scenario have been changed to protect the innocent and the shortcomings of one individual.*

Amy and I have been emailing back and forth for a while trying to set up an appointment. I told her I was convinced God was a woman because every time she had availability one of my clients would step in with a request for a meeting. It got so bad after three weeks that during one phone call with a client my mind wandered around and I contemplated asking her if she was any good at oral sex. Thankfully I didn’t and my embarrassment was reserved for when the client and I met and she reviewed the work I had accomplished for her. She wanted an apartment block designed and I mainly design slaughter houses for a living. Obviously my mistake was not accurately diving her attitude towards the tenants.

I arrived at the pre-approved site to pick her up. I informed her I may be late as I was coming in from the City. As it turned out thanks to my British Dominatrix minded GPS and my uncanny ability to piss off several hundred commuters by cutting them off, I arrived somewhat early. I texted letting her know I arrived and she texted back that she was on her way. I told her that I was the devastatingly handsome cleric in the red car (yes I am aware of the irony of being an online Cardinal who drives a red car). It wasn’t until I sent the message that I realized that I was the only car in the parking lot.

*Smoooooooooth*

I then received a text message from her that she was wearing black and blue and would arrive shortly. No sooner had I received that text that out of the corner of my eye I spot a dog on a leash rounding the corner with its owner in tow. And he was wearing a black t-shirt and blue shorts. OMG I thought! I can’t believe this! My heart sank as I realized that she totally lied about her height being 4’-10.” She’s obviously a poor judge of size which will work to my advantage when I’m naked and I let her see what 10” looks like. I quickly text her back saying “I hope to hell you’re not the guy walking towards my car.” It was then that I saw her on the other side of the parking lot approaching with a huge smile supported by a 4’-9” frame. She was still off by 1” inch in my opinion.

After a short drive we arrived at the no-tell. I had arrived early to set up the room and turn the AC on. When we got in I asked her to make herself comfortable and set the temperature to what she liked. She thanked me and asked if we could turn off the 5 spot lights and get rid of the tiny Asian man with the camera I had set up in the room prior. I reluctantly agreed. It’s worth noting at this point that prior to our meeting Amy and I had talked about the different positions we’ve tried and those we liked vs. those we didn’t. She made it known she was shy and self conscience about certain positions. I took this to mean I could be in control in guiding her in the positions I wanted her in.

*That’s what she wanted me to think…….*

Her physical attributes are accurate. She has a tiny frame with wonderful curves that I would hope she is very proud of. I had asked her to wear high heels and she did. They really played up the muscle tone in her calves which I find attractive. Her scent was intoxicating and we quickly started kissing while taking off each others clothes. Not sure why but in the back of my mind I couldn’t get over the fact that she insisted she was 4’-10” when it was plain to see she was 4’-9.” She was very responsive to my touch and moved around in as many positions as my body would allow. On more than one occasion I could feel her orgasm. By my calculation she was leading 3-0 and I had yet to have my first shot on goal. When we switched positions to where she could perform oral on me I was apprehensive about what was to happen. She does have a reputation for doing this quite well so I braced myself. Nothing could prepare me for what happened next. As she completely ravaged me my eyes opened wide and I froze. Who in God’s name would put those curtains as a window treatment with that wall colour!

My apologies for the tangent……

She had me in a position that I thought if I moved I would do serious damage to her. She reassured me nothing of the sort would happen. We switched to 69 and she was able to take me further in if that was possible. In this position a struggle ensued. I would pleasure her to the point where she became so distracted by she stopped what she was doing. She would let out a hard moan into my thigh and then attack my member to retaliate. This went back and forth for some time before I could no longer take it. There are so many times you can think about dead puppies and I had gone to that well too many times on this occasion. We quickly changed positions and I finally got my first shot on goal.

We talked some more and as I was in the washroom to get cleaned up she was standing at the door naked and smiling at me. We talked about her ability to orgasm so many times and even though I asked her how many times she already cum she said she didn’t know. It was 6 to my 1 and I WAS counting. It’s at this point that I realized if I had been only 20 years younger the score would have been 6 - 2 and I would be in jail for doing unspeakable things to a minor. I needed to redeem myself in the second round and make the score somewhat more respectable.
That didn’t go well for me either. I think she used the next round to subtly illustrate to me where my place was. We switched to a variety of positions at one point we may have made up a few of our own. When she climbed on top she let loose. No matter what I did to help her she kept the rhythm going at her own pace and dominating the movement. She was getting off and would stare at me intently. This was such a turn on and I just gave into the fact I was her masturbatory aid on this bed and I just watched her. One orgasm after another ensued and at this point the rout was on!

This went beyond rubbing it in. (no pun intended…..well maybe just a little). Now she’s just showing off!

There would have been video and possibly pictures of this encounter but if you remember Amy kicked the little Asian man with the camera out of our room so go and blame her. After getting cleaned up and a little more conversation centered around the bed sheets being soaked we went back to my car where and drove her back to the place I picked her up. I thanked her for the “schooling she laid on me.” I had a wonderful time and I hope to see her again for a rematch. Next time I will make sure that when she’s close to climaxing I will pick her up and spin her around like a propeller to distract her.

As I write this I’m proud to say that what few abs I have still hurt when I bend over. It’s as if I had been doing sit ups all day. On the up side my lower back feels great. I’ve let my chiropractor know I won’t be seeing her any more. When she asked what she could do to keep me as a client my mind again wandered around and I contemplated asking HER if she was any good at oral sex.
 

dirkd101

Well-known member
Sep 29, 2005
10,321
75
48
eastern frontier
Nice review Cardinal. It's refreshing to see a Cardinal who doesn't have a propensity for young boys, but one who gives in and commits sins of grave matter with the weaker sex.
 

Mod100

Super Moderator
Feb 18, 2010
2,226
1
0
Cardinal Fang have you met Chaos Theory? The purveyor of book length reviews.
 

Mod99

Moderator
Feb 13, 2010
11,878
5,100
113
Please tell them I put my teeth in a jar on the nightstand while you got undressed, and that a ten gallon Shopvac has no horsepower next to a geriatric gummer from Tupela.
This post is useless without pics.
 

firstr8guy

Member
Jun 20, 2008
356
10
18
I love you, Cardinal Fingerfuck, but I have the attention span of a gnat. Please review me in a few concise expletives. Amy deserves a novel, but I want ice cream. Look at the yellow car.
Interesting comment, I'll look forward to the review
 

Mr. Piggy

Banned
Jul 4, 2007
3,033
1
0
Oshawa
You can't go wrong with Amy. Seen her a few times now for her oral only sessions and can't wait to get home so I can have my tongue in and all over her juicy spot again. I love making her cum and having her returning the favor as well.
 

maxwellsmart

Active member
Apr 11, 2006
2,610
3
38
Control
Excellent review, Cardinal. I may or may not contact Amy based on your review; however, I can't wait to read your review of your next "inquisition"!
 

Wings

New member
May 26, 2010
44
0
0
Amy sure is a bundle of fun and I didn't even get oral!!!!
Ah too bad! That crushed any ideas I had when I looked at her new pictures. Ms Fatale you did a great job of capturing the sexy and fun side of a usually shy innocent looking woman
 

Mr. Piggy

Banned
Jul 4, 2007
3,033
1
0
Oshawa
I just got back from seeing Amy again. There is nothing I can add to what has been already said. She is awsome. Thank you again Amy. Think I need a nap.
 

69 4 EVER

New member
Aug 10, 2012
2
0
0
Amy has again inspired me which why I decided to join. I have had several sessions recently w Amy, some on concurrent days including this AM (This must Heaven, so be gone with me now) and considering my overall lenghty years of experience with women, and 5 full years with SP's, no SP has ever kept me as enticed and shown such versatility as Amy has. A truly AWESOME WOMAN.
 

Celticman

Into Ties and Tail
Aug 13, 2009
8,914
80
48
Durham & Toronto
His reviews lack tension and I find I'm not invested in the character development as I would be if it was Amish Midget Porn. I'd like to work on a review of sexhaiku. My subsequent post and her caustic rebuttal would be apocalyptic porn.
Cardinal, you and crackerjack supply us with great content and delicous humour. Cracker does not write too often which is a shame. His Epiphany on milf bars and sheep was epic.

Anyway, thank you sir. This was a great review told with a funny, twisted perspective. I nearly fell off my chair on this one:

""Nothing could prepare me for what happened next. As she completely ravaged me my eyes opened wide and I froze. Who in God’s name would put those curtains as a window treatment with that wall colour!""


btw I will be seeing Amy today for the first time today. Even on the phone making the arrangements, what a sweetheart.
 
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