How do you prevent yourself from becoming friends with the person you're with?

[Musclepower777]

Leading to many of these experiences do you find it difficult sometimes to keep things strictly professional since even though this is a business you still are dealing with another human being. As a guy, how do keep things strictly impersonal? And how do you keep from being friends. Or worrying about her and hoping she's safe if she's a regular?
How do you keep things purely sexual and purely business?

 

[DaksMan]

You just enjoy your time, however brief or long it may be.

Humans are not entitled to each other... We move freely, make our own decisions, change our minds. The natural tendency is to focus on scarcity and loss, but the truth of the matter is once a relationship -- business, or personal -- ends, that's it. Save the resurrections for necromancers, move on and find something new.

So, keeping that in mind, enjoy your time. Be human. There's nothing wrong with being friends, or at least being friendly. There's nothing wrong with looking out for and caring for others. To be completely impersonal is to be cold, and unless someone's kink is being abused, I don't think anyone enjoys coldness. And when it ends, or when it goes badly, just let it go, and treasure the moments that you did have, instead of dwelling on what was lost.

 

[bazokajoe]

It's easy. When you leave she doesn't give you a second thought, so why should you..
Sounds like there are too many lonely hearts on this board.

 

[jesse_b]

You just enjoy your time, however brief or long it may be.

Humans are not entitled to each other... We move freely, make our own decisions, change our minds. The natural tendency is to focus on scarcity and loss, but the truth of the matter is once a relationship -- business, or personal -- ends, that's it. Save the resurrections for necromancers, move on and find something new.

So, keeping that in mind, enjoy your time. Be human. There's nothing wrong with being friends, or at least being friendly. There's nothing wrong with looking out for and caring for others. To be completely impersonal is to be cold, and unless someone's kink is being abused, I don't think anyone enjoys coldness. And when it ends, or when it goes badly, just let it go, and treasure the moments that you did have, instead of dwelling on what was lost.

Couldn't agree more. I second that being cold is cruel at many level for both...

 

[jesse_b]

Sounds like there are too many lonely hearts on this board.

Agreed!

 

[GeeBee]

It really does depend why you're in this and what you want out of an interaction with an SP.

Where once I might have found the pure sex, walk in the door - pay the girl - shower - fuck - leave scenario attractive, as an older guy I find the best sex happens when I enjoy her company and we can treat each other as friends. I don't want things to be strictly impersonal. Intelligent conversation before, during and after the action makes for a way better sexual experience for me.

So I'm going to end up liking a girl who becomes a regular and yeah I may end up being concerned about her well being etc... But as long as I'm prepared for it, know she isn't my girlfriend, and know that she's just going to disappear one day, I'm cool with it if it makes my experiences with her better.

 

[D'arcy]

Leading to many of these experiences do you find it difficult sometimes to keep things strictly professional since even though this is a business you still are dealing with another human being. As a guy, how do keep things strictly impersonal? And how do you keep from being friends. Or worrying about her and hoping she's safe if she's a regular?
How do you keep things purely sexual and purely business?

In my experience sometimes trying to keep things purely business is unavoidable. Sometimes you just click better with some clients and become friends with them. And that's because of who those people are outside of the bedroom. I have found myself getting very friendly with a few clients and it was getting to the point that they were going to want to start hanging out off the clock and I asked them to make a choice... I said they could still see me as an escort or they could be... But to try and do both creates blurred lines. And blurred lines are exactly what I'm trying to avoid in this business. Ironically everyone that I gave this ultimatum to actually chose to be my friend outside the business. So I lost them as a client but I gained some great friends.

 

[D'arcy]

It's easy. When you leave she doesn't give you a second thought, so why should you..
Sounds like there are too many lonely hearts on this board.

Some people see providers because they have lonely dicks, and others see providers because they have lonely hearts, and others see providers because they have BOTH a lonely dick and a lonely heart.

In a perfect world and no one would ever get feelings for one another but sometimes they pop up. Just like dicks... Lol

 

[Musclepower777]

In my experience sometimes trying to keep things purely business is unavoidable. Sometimes you just click better with some clients and become friends with them. And that's because of who those people are outside of the bedroom. I have found myself getting very friendly with a few clients and it was getting to the point that they were going to want to start hanging out off the clock and I asked them to make a choice... I said they could still see me as an escort or they could be... But to try and do both creates blurred lines. And blurred lines are exactly what I'm trying to avoid in this business. Ironically everyone that I gave this ultimatum to actually chose to be my friend outside the business. So I lost them as a client but I gained some great friends.

Ultimately I think this is what prevents me from taking that first plunge. Raging testosterone and sex drive on one side, not knowing how to keep things purely sexual on the other. I mean I've had my share of one night stands and they always felt one dimensional. Sadly there's no real way to keep things fwb on one side and professional on the other. I doubt any escort would be open to just hanging out or going to an art show or a baseball game lol.