Royal Spa

Frederica from Discreet Valley

eeyore6

Member
Aug 31, 2004
50
5
8
Quinte area
Well, after numerous nights of checking out sites and comparing reviews, I figured I'd venture outside the TERB comfort zone...d'oh! Bad Idea. I searched high and low and found the only reviews of Abracadabra (or Discreet Valley) to be discussions of who owned the business and not about the ladies on staff. So, off I go, with more money than brains and TOFTT. Their site is pretty cool, where it has real time updates of who's on and who's available. I selected Frederica, looks hot, decent decription. She seemed like tonight's best option, so I make the call.

Phone guys says she'll be there in 30-45 min. Well, didn't I just about fall over when she was at my door in 37 minutes. Frederica is very cute, blonde streaks with an innocent appearance. Greeted me with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. (Slight smell of smoke on her, don't know if she's a smoker or the driver is.) Paid for the hour, she makes the call, and then she led me into the bedroom.

Well, I guess the night had been going too well, because this is where the wheels fall off Eeyore's proverbial wagon. She immediately strips and hops on the bed. Well, normally I'm a foreplay kinda guy...you know a little cuddling, slowly undressing, and such, but damn she's cute, so I strip down and hop on the bed beside her. She's got smooth dark skin, a few tats and a couple piercings. She asks me what I like, and then tells me that there is only one SOG, no kissing, everything covered, no digits. Well, I'm used to 2 SOG for the hour, but I guess I'll just have to pace myself.

She puts the raincoat on piglet and starts with the CBJ. Not bad at that skill, but a little rushed. After a few minutes (emphasis on a few) she asks me to go on top. I figure I'll go for a little DATY, but only get down to her nipples before my spidey sense starts tingling. Something's rotten in the state of Denmark...and if it's not rotten, it was definitely put away wet and left for a while. :eek: Usually you read of SPs wanting their clients to be clean and tidy before the appointment, and we expect the same of them. Well, if I wanted something that was odoriferous as this, I'd would have asked my fellow Terbites where the low track is in Ottawa. But I digress...

I quickly changed direction and started on her mish - ummm, uninspired. No effort, just the odd gratuitous porn groan. (Of course, I am totally thinking about the smell...you know how you just get preoccupied and can't get it out of your head...well, that's the battle that I'm fighting now). After a bit, I ask her to go on top and she climbs up. Now, I gotta tell you, this chick is hot, and man is it a good view from down below...but did I mention that I was preoccupied with something?? She sets a wicked pace, and eventually, I have to give up the good fight and finish...might be a good thing seeing as I was not really in to it since I found...well, you know where I am going with this.

As she's dressing, her phone rings and she answers and the only thing I catch out of the francais conversation is "sept minutes". Now, I don't know if she's saying how long it will take her to get to the car, or how long it took me to finish, 'cause I missed the rest of the conversation. For the record, it was more like 15 minutes . Anyways, she's dressed and out the door and I hop in the shower, scrubbing like a SOB.

So, as I type this, I still have 15 minutes left in my appointment and she's been gone for a while...

L-8 (She's a looker, that's for sure.)
A-3 (No effort, just lays there; did work when on top doing CG)
S-1 (I think the S is for service, and this was a disservice)

Repeat - no way. Not even with your money.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go scrub in the tub.

Until next time,

E6
 
Jul 28, 2006
1,901
2
36
Well done eeyore6, well done. Great review. Hope you didn't scrub the pink of your piglet! This agency is far from discreet and have had less than favorable reviews on this and other boards in the past. You have to wonder about their business savy with different names like abracadabra, discreet valley, the magic touch, they've got multiple personalities it would seem. Also you have to wonder about their creadability when some members of their line up promote them selves in other venues as much as 10 years younger. I wouldn't trustem as far as I can throw my horesey!

The odoriferous issue is on I spoke about recently in another venue. While I respect and honor the sp's requests to be clean and fresh for them I demand it of them after all we're the customer and should not have to deal with the awkwardness of having to ask them to wipe or clean up, but more so it should damn well be part of the total package. When you buy a new car or even a used one for that matter, they clean it for you, don't they. I don't know I get around on a horse. Likely at issue here as is the case often with agencies, this girl was over booked and off to another appointment. It's quite possible she saw you right after being with someone else and likely didn't shower or freshen up with him, she didn't when she arrived at your place and didn't clean up after leaving either. Of course I'm speculating here but I doubt I'm far from the truth.

Of course this does not apply to all providers or agencies, but you know what they say a few bad apples can spoil it for the bunch!

Any how eeyore6 great job on the review. Keep it up! So to speak!
 

antlerman

All about the fun!
Jun 28, 2005
1,681
1
38
Nice review......sorry to hear.......

But.....

if it smell like trout...get the F*** out...if it smells like chicken...keep on lickin!
 

the_hwyman

Member
Oct 1, 2005
263
1
18
Yeah, sucks that you had the bad experience...but it's almost like you gotta experience the odd one of them to really enjoy and respect the good ones when you find them.

I just took a peak at their site just to see what this girl looked like and noticed that this agency also has "the one who shall not be named" on their roster...that alone speaks volumes about the place... :rolleyes:
 

Behrooz

Member
Nov 5, 2006
39
0
6
i just checked their site, i met Frederica when her name use to be Lolita, my experince was bit better, but very rushed, she was clockwatcher, answering cell phones, and no LFK or any sort of K, so it was a no repeat for me. i feel bad, why i did not review her then, but they have changed her name for a reason.
 

Muff-dive

New member
Sep 14, 2006
41
0
0
Man i had a lady like this once,now i tell them everything better be right or don't come by,and i want to be the first on there shift.Sorry the here this bro and hope the next lady is better.
 

twizzler2

Not Just Candy Anymore
Sep 17, 2005
734
0
0
Well, I'm sorry to report the woman who is now on the website as Lolita, is in fact Frederica.

My experience was exactly like eeyore's.

She's reasonably good looking, but the fun ends there. Rushed, mechanical, restrictive, the smell is "like an outhouse door on fishing boat". It's a mood killer.

Repeat ? no, never.
 

o-dog

Member
Oct 11, 2008
197
5
18
I was with Caroline back in October...not bad but I would not recommend. Attractive and somewhat pleasant, but she was more interested in her iPhone than providing service. There was a language problem there in her defence, her english is not very good at all and I don't speak much french.

Lindsay and Sofia were great, but they're not there anymore. Chloe is back as Angela....she's very good. One of the best BBBJ's I ever had - amazing - but it doesn't seem like she works that much. Offers incalls when she does though...
 

kih

New member
May 19, 2008
352
0
0
Thanks for sharing your experience.

To date, I have had three experiences with DV:

Caroline - two occasions and another gal which resembled Halle Berry. All three experiences were fantastic.
 
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