For the Girls: Biggest Downside of Biz?

[midLifeCrisis]

In the thread Economic Theory of Prostitution a paper is referenced which attempts to explain `high wages for unskilled work` as an SP in terms of lost opportunities in the `marriage market`. The authors argue that there is a stigma to the business which prevents SP`s from making lucrative marriages and hence they do not have the opportunity to share the husband`s income.

Now, as I`ve mentioned in the thread, I think that this is, at best, a very minor factor in determining career - but there is none-the-less some evidence that SP`s will make more money in the biz than they could otherwise, which would normally cause other girls to come in and compete, but they don`t ... so there must be some kind of reason.

So I`m asking you: what is the biggest single downside of being in the business? To be really rigorous I would have to poll non-SP`s and find out why they don`t go for the so-called easy money, but this will have to do for now.

Even one answer will make my data better than used in the paper, so maybe I`ll be able to publish the findings, get tenure, move to the Annex, buy a cat and wear a beret. I`ve always wanted to wear a beret, so please help me out here and respond to the poll.

 

[Beau]

being misunderstood, mis-labeled

also, the biggest downside to earning a living in this industry is the limited number of workers that do not invest in themselves and their future that they sometimes invest in all others. easy come easy go as they say and its very easy to get caught living beyond ones means.

the stigma is the most challenging aspect of choosing to be in this biz, for me. When the majority of people believe one thing about a sex worker, it takes a very strong partner to also stand up to that stigma or defend that stigma. Not many would bother getting involved. those that do, in general, typically, are feeding from some vulnerability, insecurity, lifestyle, the easy money, etc.
In other cases it is simply from a survival, temporary set-back of life that cannot be avoided and is accepted as such.

at the same time there is the general lack of respect, appreciation, acceptance, love, etc. from our counterparts, the individuals we are serving daily. the double standard usually applies at the expense of the consumer in way of poor service that depletes energy instead of increasing energy. the mistake is contempt, judgement, dis-respect, assumption of inferiority, etc.

the reason a person enters this biz is as unique, individual, personal, varied as the people themselves. If we deducted the reasons it would simply come from love or fear. Love of the lifestyle, feelings of satisfaction in helping others, high self-esteem, pace, flexibiltiy and happiness that you can support oneself and or others in a family. The opposite applies with choosing this work from fear, insecurity, selfishness, etc. and usually ends in unhappiness of some kind or other.

I ask myself very often, how can others be a slave to the grind for corporations, insensitive people and just generally life depleting, meaningless jobs that offer nothing much for a buck or two, going nowhere fast???

People are people no matter who is looking at who. Sex Trade workers are simlpy adept at tolerance, acceptance, appreciation, providing selfless acts of kindness in this world, priceless skill and qualification not typically carrying monetary value. I say in today's day and age this is an even more important consideration.

Go Lemmings Go!!

Beau

 

[midLifeCrisis]

You should change the poll to a multi-option. There are a few options things I would click up there. Unless of course you re looking for only one answer.

Kiarra

I thought of that, but then that gets just as hard ... one might think, for instance, that the biggest downside by far is "Chance of STD's", but "Disrespect from clients" is an issue too. How big an issue would the second choice have to be before you clicked both of them and, for purposes of the poll, responded that they were equally bad?

One downside I thought of later, after I posted the poll, was variability of earnings ... with the stock market having been so bad for the past three years there are a lot fewer guys grinning to themselves that they 'made $5000 today ... can afford a little fun!'. Additionally, January is a bad month for virtually any kind of discretionary spending ... taking the two factors together, I'll bet there are a lot of 'untouchable' savings accounts being touched this week.

Kiarra, your views are always of interest - why not click "other" and elucidate?

 

[sweetnlovinlady]

NO-SHOWS

i second that thought. if it was us standing them up we would be getting flamed and torn apart , but how about us and our time it matters to

 

[sorely]

We're all bought and sold in the market place. Every day most of us have to deal with assholes of both sexes. The world's full of liars who sow the ongoing seeds of falsehood and deception. Just be aware of it. Nobody is immune.

All of that being said , it's great to be alive and see what's behind every new door. Once you've seen it , the magic is usually gone and it's off to the next door. Hope there are lots of doors ???

Keep a balanced outlook; understand your weaknesses; consider the downside; and, live like hell !!

 

[midLifeCrisis]

the stigma is the most challenging aspect of choosing to be in this biz, for me. When the majority of people believe one thing about a sex worker, it takes a very strong partner to also stand up to that stigma or defend that stigma. Not many would bother getting involved. those that do, in general, typically, are feeding from some vulnerability, insecurity, lifestyle, the easy money, etc.

Thanks for your thoughts, Beau. It must get frustrating.

Originally posted by secret_touch
NO-SHOWS BURN MY ASS TO THE LIMIT!

Originally posted by sweetnlovinlady
i second that thought.

Originally posted by kiarra
I think really the biggest downfall is screening for the right clients, and dealing with idiots, liars, and regular people I would not normally deal with.

I should have made 'dealing with disrespectful pseudo-clients' a poll option! To a certain extent, you can't get away from this behaviour when dealing with the public ... 90% of the people who enter a place of business want to do some business (or at least consider it) ... the rest just want to bust your chops and bust your chops and bust your chops. But I'm fully prepared to believe that it's more of a problem in the biz than elsewhere, given that Joe Cool at 5 p.m. might chicken out at 10.

Kiarra, it sounds as if you've found yourself a good niche, with no more than the usual small-business grumbles and worries. Good for you! And it was very sweet of you to move an 'appointment with midLifeCrisis' to the credit side of the ledger!

 

[sweetnlovinlady]

kiarra

quote:

Originally posted by kiarra

Now as for you not booking midlife, that is the horror that every SP has to deal with in this biz, we have come up with a support group for all us rejected ones.


where do i sign up lol

 

[Beau]

Thanks for your thoughts, Beau. It must get frustrating.


Really frustating for the other people in our lives that dont know how to deal with the issues, the honesty. Not necessarily frustrating for myself as I take full responsibility for my choices. I enjoy my work, others are afraid of me for choosing and enjoying this line work. The shame and guilt are with them. I can sleep at night and have a good look in the am. I don't feel sorry for my self as others close to me may feel. Phone calls to ask "are you ok??? were worried about you..." Are the most frustrating thing for me to deal with regarding the stigma. Liars, cheats and crooks are easier for me to handle in the day-to-day. Beau

 

[wet and waiting]

Definitely the No-Shows

If only we could charge a cancellation fee like the dentist does.

Fear of STDs would be right up there as well, although if you keep him covered you definitely reduce the risks.

I would also add, lack of health and dental benefits, Employment Insurance, or WSIB benefits. But that is what I keep the day job for.

Beyond that, I would have to say, is there really any downside? I have as much sex as I want, with a variety of very fascinating men, and enjoy stimulating conversations in these forums. Can't say I have much to complain about.

 

[Bboy]

Contract time?

I would also add, lack of health and dental benefits, Employment Insurance, or WSIB benefits. But that is what I keep the day job for.

Kiarra I've said it before you should really unionize. Then enter into collective bargaining with who pays you...which would make us management!...wait a minute we're all already doing that on a regular basis! Nevermind.