Favourite Suggestive Bumper Stickers

I noticed a couple of bumper stickers/slogans that made me chuckle today...

On a roofer's truck: "Roofers climb on top and keep bangin' away!"

On an overhead door truck: "If you can't get it up, call..."

On a printer's delivery van: "We do it over and over and over..."

Seen any good ones lately?

Stoo
 

Average Joe

Senior Member
Mar 28, 2002
363
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Creative Slogans

In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

On an electrician's truck, "Let us remove your shorts."

In a nonsmoking area, "If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

On a maternity room door, "Push, Push, Push."

On a front door, "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog."

At an optometrist's office, "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

On a taxidermist's window, "We really know our stuff."

On a butcher's window, "Let me meat your needs."

On a fence, "Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive."

At a car dealership, "The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment."

Outside a muffler shop, "No appointment necessary. We'll hear you coming."

On a desk in a reception room, "We shoot every third salesman, and the second one just left."

In a veterinarian's waiting room, "Be back in five minutes. Sit! Stay!"

At the electric company, "We would be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be."

In a beauty shop, "Dye now!"

On the side of a garbage truck, "We've got what it takes to take what you've got."

In a restaurant window, "Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up."

Inside a bowling alley, "Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop."

In a cafeteria, "Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria. Socks can eat any place they want."
 

Average Joe

Senior Member
Mar 28, 2002
363
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0
Bumper Stickers

Body by Nautilus; brain by Mattel
Money Isn't Everything... But it Sure Keeps the Kids In Touch
If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you!
You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me not you!
JESUS SAVES...He Passes It To Gretzky...Gretzky Shoots. He Scores!
You are depriving some poor village of its IDIOT
WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
The more you complain, the longer God makes you live.
IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.
Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
We are born naked, wet, and hungry....Then things get worse.
Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway
CAUTION - Driver legally blonde!
Heart Attacks...God's Revenge for Eating His Animal Friends
Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window!
1,000,000 sperm and YOU were the fastest?
Don't piss me off! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.
Grow your own dope, plant a man
BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
I need someone really bad...Are you really bad?
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
All men are idiots....I married their king.
Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.
I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
Where there's a will...I want to be in it.
It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
Never fight ugly people--they have nothing to loose.
I'm the man of this house and I have my wife's permission to say so.
Fight crime, shoot back.
Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell is afraid I'll take over.
Suicide is a way of telling God, "You can't fire me, I quit!"
Strip mining prevents forest fires.
Flies spread disease. Keep yours zipped.
Rehab is for quitters.
I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.
I'm not completely worthless. I can be used as a bad example.
Veni, vidi, velcro: I came, I saw, I stuck around.
Learn from your parents' mistakes--use birth control.
My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her... or something like that.
Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!
 

BBW_Morgan

Banned
Sep 11, 2001
132
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0
Toronto
www.independentescorts.ca
This is on a wig and hair extension shop around the corner from me:

Come in feeling like a drag -- leave looking like a Queen!

Three guesses who a lot of their clientelle are...

Morgan
 

johnny

New member
Feb 12, 2002
232
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the back of a t-shirt on a guy riding a motorcycle-
"if you can read this, the bitch fell off"
 

torex

senior member
Aug 18, 2001
695
6
18
Toronto
I saw a guy in an old model T ford with the suicide bucket seat on the back,this car was in mint shape !funny he would slap this bumper sticker on the back,it said "Yes!My Mother did Acid" lol thought it was kinda funny since it was an old fellow driving!
 

Heather

New member
Aug 22, 2001
131
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0
My favorite is perfect for SP's bumpers:


Don't hate me because I'm beautiful. Hate me because I'm fucking your boyfriend.
 

Jenn_angel

Banned
Jan 27, 2002
903
0
0
In Rome with the Pope
Sharon@VIP said:
"DON'T TRUST ANYTHING THAT BLEEDS FOR 5 DAYS AND DOESN'T DIE."
Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL (THIS IS MY FAVORITE)


Sharon@VIP:)
I would also like to state... It was on my class room wall in high school...
 
W

Willywants

Sticky Subject!

Sticker handed out to clients on leaving a brothel:

"If you see any parts drop off, please honk!"

Another whimsy:

"Your place or mine? Make it mine! I don't know where you live!"

Willy
 
W

Willywants

Don't Know Where This One Came From!

My fertile, dirty little mind I guess!

"You wash! I'll dry with my absorbent tongue!"
 

A1Provider

New member
May 4, 2002
46
0
0
Toronto
Licence plate

I was driving on the DVP and a classy older woman was driving a beautiful Jaguar. She passed me and when I read her licence plate I almost drove off the road. It read-
' WAZ HIS ' .
Ouch I would hate to have been her ex-husband.
 
Toronto Escorts