falling in love with an SP.
- Thread starter superstar1
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Ole dad
Well said Fitman-----My Mentor.
With a SP can be a Very special experience....if you allow it to happen!
In my case I was very apprehensive about it but it has turned out to be the best thing that has ever happened to me!
I thank the very special lady for allowing me into her life and teaching and sharing with me her great experiences!
Is it without strain,pressure,and sadness at times...of course...but the many hours we spend in love together are worth the occaisional pain.
well said Fitman--No wonder you remain my mentor. Conned-thats all BS--You get out what you put in .These ladies are Human beings-and yes guys they DO have feelings.
Trust me --I am there.
Misty you go girl--you know Im pulling for you two.
And for all the people who say that its not worth it--you are so wrong.
Well said Fitman-----My Mentor.
With a SP can be a Very special experience....if you allow it to happen!
In my case I was very apprehensive about it but it has turned out to be the best thing that has ever happened to me!
I thank the very special lady for allowing me into her life and teaching and sharing with me her great experiences!
Is it without strain,pressure,and sadness at times...of course...but the many hours we spend in love together are worth the occaisional pain.
well said Fitman--No wonder you remain my mentor. Conned-thats all BS--You get out what you put in .These ladies are Human beings-and yes guys they DO have feelings.
Trust me --I am there.
Misty you go girl--you know Im pulling for you two.
And for all the people who say that its not worth it--you are so wrong.
Re: This has been ....
To the extent that sp's are trying to create a " fantasy encounter " it would seem risky to fall in love with a fantasy as the reality may be different . Risks are sometimes worth taking , but you are right this is a once a month topic now.
Who said the way to a man's heart was through his stomach?...lol
Why would I consider myself lucky ? Or unlucky for that matter . It's not as if all non-sp's are horrible in bed if that was your point .Mystique Misty said:the discussion on this board many times . Why do you discuss it .....obviously cuz it is very much on your minds and maybe your hopefull that you will be the lucky 1 to have fallen for a lady that escorts for a living ?
To the extent that sp's are trying to create a " fantasy encounter " it would seem risky to fall in love with a fantasy as the reality may be different . Risks are sometimes worth taking , but you are right this is a once a month topic now.
Who said the way to a man's heart was through his stomach?...lol
Sorry Misty and Dr. Watchsum, I have to respectfully disagree. Attempting a relationship with a SP/MPA/Dancer is usually more difficult than a relationship with someone outside of those professions. In almost all relationships, there are insecurities and jealousies about previous boyfriend and girlfriends, that is amplified even more when the woman in the relationship participates in intimate acts as a profession. Yes, we men know that it's a job, and that there usually lacks the emotional connection to make an appointment even come close to what love is like between two people who have fallen for each other, but it is still a difficult pill to swallow.
How did I try and handle it? Well, very early on we agreed that we would have to either carry this through a personal or business avenue. You can't mix work and play. So we decided that money would never be an issue, and we tried to date like normal people do. Meaning that we stole time together whenever possible (she's one of those SPs that are booked for the whole shift every week, which explains her prolonged vacation), and I certainly didn't expect to hop in the sack with her every time we met up. We just enjoyed having dinner, watching a movie, clubbing, and doing other silly things like renting hotel rooms for the hell of it, or going shopping together before her shift. Normal relationship things.
In the end, if you care about her and not just having sex with her, it will show, and it will be reciprocated if she feels the same way. At that point, it really is up to both of you to decide how to handle the fact that she is in such a profession. You simply cannot ignore the issue, and believe me, it *will* cause bumps in the relationship, no matter how open-minded or secure either of you two are.
How did I try and handle it? Well, very early on we agreed that we would have to either carry this through a personal or business avenue. You can't mix work and play. So we decided that money would never be an issue, and we tried to date like normal people do. Meaning that we stole time together whenever possible (she's one of those SPs that are booked for the whole shift every week, which explains her prolonged vacation), and I certainly didn't expect to hop in the sack with her every time we met up. We just enjoyed having dinner, watching a movie, clubbing, and doing other silly things like renting hotel rooms for the hell of it, or going shopping together before her shift. Normal relationship things.
In the end, if you care about her and not just having sex with her, it will show, and it will be reciprocated if she feels the same way. At that point, it really is up to both of you to decide how to handle the fact that she is in such a profession. You simply cannot ignore the issue, and believe me, it *will* cause bumps in the relationship, no matter how open-minded or secure either of you two are.
Hey Misty,Mystique Misty said:
dudelove .....falling in love with an Sp is NEVER a good idea ? How narrowminded is that statement ? Are we not people too that are deserving of love and all the emotions and feelings that result from being truely , madly, deeply and passionately in love ? Yes there is a big difference between making love and sex and love and infatuation . Being in the biz allowed me the opportunity to find out the differences , this is not an advantage all of us have . And your statement about why would a lady that has financial independence need to find a man to spend the rest of her life with ? Because you cant be intimate with , make love to and be loved by money . Nothing can compare to the warmth of the human touch especially when your being touched by someone your heart and soul is conneted to . Sorry comparing real humans , feelings and emotions to that of owning and trading stocks etc. is completely ridiculous . You have obviously not found a true body and soul connection with anyone to make such a statement ( that is my opinion anyway ) .
>>> Misty
What would you prefer to do, sucking your lover's cock before or after he eats your pussy, or having a bubble bath with a battery charged rabbit-shaped dildo pleasuring yourself alone?
See many women aren't necessarily like the idea of having man's eat your pussy first.....you expect to return the favour whether you like it or not. For the pros like you, how many clients aren't really the stereotype "dirty old man"? At least I am not there yet.
Ask yourself is he really loving you not because he can get a free and good f*ck? Would he treat the same when both of you aged and you are out of shape faster than your significant other?
I can tell many SPs could not even answer these questions after soul-searching.
In any case, I still believe this is in most case a one way traffic. Sure many SP earn a very decent living compare to the "civilian 9 to 5 jobs", I am not totally surprised when the SP falls in love with a client because the client is really rich and he seems willing to share a substantial amount of his fortune with you, regardless of any pre-nup or not.
Look at Laura Bush. She was very attractive when she was young-blonde hair and blue eyes. Why would she fall in love with the Dubya, a squared, dumb, drunk playboy wannabe who became born-again Christian? Cause the Dubya has money and he seems to share his (father's) wealth with her. She got the bonus or put it bluntly a jackpot when her significantly dumb other "accidentally" became the most powerful man in the world.
Nothing as good as that.
Think about it, would you ever fall in love with any guys, clients or otherwise like those out of shape, geeky, square, hairy jabronis in the Average Joe Hawaii reality show?
BTW, another reason why falling in love with an SP is NEVER a good idea.
When you two get intimate and "fall" in love and suddenly out of the blue your SP "girlfriend" says if you love her, are you willing to help her "immediate" relatives or even families financially, someone she never mentions before until now. Or something along the line like you are willing to buy life insurance for her used to be estranged sisters or brothers, maybe even sponsoring her families to become permanent landed immigrants.
How would you respond? Would you guys cut the bait and run like plague?
When you two get intimate and "fall" in love and suddenly out of the blue your SP "girlfriend" says if you love her, are you willing to help her "immediate" relatives or even families financially, someone she never mentions before until now. Or something along the line like you are willing to buy life insurance for her used to be estranged sisters or brothers, maybe even sponsoring her families to become permanent landed immigrants.
How would you respond? Would you guys cut the bait and run like plague?
Just don't do it! I did, and it lasted for several years. Comes down to, why did she do it in the first place? In need of money!
After several attempts to have her get a regular job, her comments were, what?, work 40 hours in a week and earn $400?
I can earn that in 3 hours, if that, and not pay taxes, and not have to leave home.
How can I argue with that? Someone that is making $3,000/week, tax free, working about 20 hours a week. She can say it sucks, but to get to a real job seems to have no interest with her at all! Why would it? Work 40 hours for $400. Get up every morning, shower, get ready, drive to work, come home tired, get a bite to eat, and relax for a few minutes. On top of that have to pay taxes on what you make? Never was going to happen. I gave up and left. She was right. Why bust your ass and pay taxes like the other ignorant assholes out there that have regular jobs? Learned a good lesson. I can't thank her enough.
After several attempts to have her get a regular job, her comments were, what?, work 40 hours in a week and earn $400?
I can earn that in 3 hours, if that, and not pay taxes, and not have to leave home.
How can I argue with that? Someone that is making $3,000/week, tax free, working about 20 hours a week. She can say it sucks, but to get to a real job seems to have no interest with her at all! Why would it? Work 40 hours for $400. Get up every morning, shower, get ready, drive to work, come home tired, get a bite to eat, and relax for a few minutes. On top of that have to pay taxes on what you make? Never was going to happen. I gave up and left. She was right. Why bust your ass and pay taxes like the other ignorant assholes out there that have regular jobs? Learned a good lesson. I can't thank her enough.
At the end of the day.....
let's not forget what these SP's "provide" for a living.... SEX!! blowjobs, handjobs, kissing (sometimes), FS... whatever. IT IS A BUSINESS...they don't do it for love or because they find you particularly engaging.... they do it to make money. Falling in love with an SP?? You might as well fall in love with your auto mechanic...they're both using you for the same thing....cash.
let's not forget what these SP's "provide" for a living.... SEX!! blowjobs, handjobs, kissing (sometimes), FS... whatever. IT IS A BUSINESS...they don't do it for love or because they find you particularly engaging.... they do it to make money. Falling in love with an SP?? You might as well fall in love with your auto mechanic...they're both using you for the same thing....cash.
That's why the SPs rarely date with average Joes like us. By turning some tricks, you earn more dough than any average Joe who work their assess off can dream of. Kind of sad when you realize they have more disposable income than us after paying down the "bad" debts, while we scrap every pennies try to have "fun" either with them or go to the hockey games or boozes. Don't forget to maximize your RRSP , pay down your mortgage, car loans and credit cards balances before you have enough dough to "blow" it, if at all.4leafclover said:Just don't do it! I did, and it lasted for several years. Comes down to, why did she do it in the first place? In need of money!
After several attempts to have her get a regular job, her comments were, what?, work 40 hours in a week and earn $400?
I can earn that in 3 hours, if that, and not pay taxes, and not have to leave home.
How can I argue with that? Someone that is making $3,000/week, tax free, working about 20 hours a week. She can say it sucks, but to get to a real job seems to have no interest with her at all! Why would it? Work 40 hours for $400. Get up every morning, shower, get ready, drive to work, come home tired, get a bite to eat, and relax for a few minutes. On top of that have to pay taxes on what you make? Never was going to happen. I gave up and left. She was right. Why bust your ass and pay taxes like the other ignorant assholes out there that have regular jobs? Learned a good lesson. I can't thank her enough.
Unless they get too smart to get audit by Revenue Canada and they just blow off the dough by spending on stupid things. That also partly explain why some of the SPs would rather resist legitimization of the business, cause this will hurt their money flow and the fat profit margins.
BTW, those SPs who fall in love with the client are truly brave, it's really a leap of faith.
Re: At the end of the day.....
What if your auto mechanic was a woman.Would it be alright then?lodger said:let's not forget what these SP's "provide" for a living.... SEX!! blowjobs, handjobs, kissing (sometimes), FS... whatever. IT IS A BUSINESS...they don't do it for love or because they find you particularly engaging.... they do it to make money. Falling in love with an SP?? You might as well fall in love with your auto mechanic...they're both using you for the same thing....cash.
Well said dudelovedudelove said:
Think about it, would you ever fall in love with any guys, clients or otherwise like those out of shape, geeky, square, hairy jabronis in the Average Joe Hawaii reality show?
My two cents - 1
This is going to be another long one and will probably be split into two posts (I'm sorry)
As much as we all try to say this is a business and things should be kept professional - it is not always so easy. Unlike any other business, there is intimate contact between two people. And when you see each other more and more, you get to know what the other one likes very well. Soon enough its like an unspoken understanding and things just unfold wonderfully. And this intimacy often leads beyond that of a sexual nature. Do not think that clients are the only ones to fall into Cupid's traps! We SPs are not made of stone ourselves.
However, the relationship is initially based on need and fantasy. That makes crossing over into a personal relationship a ratherprecarious venture. A lot of problems will arise. For starters, if she spends more time with a gentleman who was once a client, she will certainly be working a lot less. This means she will need money, and chances are, she will ask him. This is not always done with manipulative intentions. You also have to consider that by dating an SP, you cannot rightly expect her to drop her entire life-style overnight - and dating an SP is not easy. That is why many an SP stay single while in the business, and after a while it gets a little lonely. And as a result SPs sometimes build attachments to their clientele.
But I have to agree with many of the men who posted here. If you truly enjoy an SPs company, let them know in a polite way, but don't merge your personal lives together. And that does not have to include giving huge tips or buying expensive gifts. Some of the best ways people have let me know was simply by looking me in the eye and sincerely thanking me for the moments of happiness I have brought to them. And really, that is more flattering then any compliment about my looks, or any glittering jewel. Happiness is a rare thing to find in this day and age, and if someone can find that by spending some time with me - *blush* Well really, how much more flattering can one be!
This is going to be another long one and will probably be split into two posts (I'm sorry)
As much as we all try to say this is a business and things should be kept professional - it is not always so easy. Unlike any other business, there is intimate contact between two people. And when you see each other more and more, you get to know what the other one likes very well. Soon enough its like an unspoken understanding and things just unfold wonderfully. And this intimacy often leads beyond that of a sexual nature. Do not think that clients are the only ones to fall into Cupid's traps! We SPs are not made of stone ourselves.
However, the relationship is initially based on need and fantasy. That makes crossing over into a personal relationship a ratherprecarious venture. A lot of problems will arise. For starters, if she spends more time with a gentleman who was once a client, she will certainly be working a lot less. This means she will need money, and chances are, she will ask him. This is not always done with manipulative intentions. You also have to consider that by dating an SP, you cannot rightly expect her to drop her entire life-style overnight - and dating an SP is not easy. That is why many an SP stay single while in the business, and after a while it gets a little lonely. And as a result SPs sometimes build attachments to their clientele.
But I have to agree with many of the men who posted here. If you truly enjoy an SPs company, let them know in a polite way, but don't merge your personal lives together. And that does not have to include giving huge tips or buying expensive gifts. Some of the best ways people have let me know was simply by looking me in the eye and sincerely thanking me for the moments of happiness I have brought to them. And really, that is more flattering then any compliment about my looks, or any glittering jewel. Happiness is a rare thing to find in this day and age, and if someone can find that by spending some time with me - *blush* Well really, how much more flattering can one be!
part 2
So my advice culminates in this: Why ruin a good thing! Reality is not so pleasant, and enjoying someone for an hour is hardly a prelude to enjoying them for a lifetime. But that does not lessen the significance of that hour. Let yourself get lost in the pleasure, enjoy her, thank her, and keep the memories as a warm reminder that there is good in the world. Be glad that you could experience that wonderful feeling of falling in love (and usually falling in love is a lot more fun then BEING in love). Really the beauty of the relationship between an SP and a client, there are no strings attatched, and compared to a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship there are relatively few expectations. Its a pretty uncomplicated form of interaction with someone, and in a way very relieving. And its so much easier to enjoy time with someone when there are absolutely no relationship politics brewing under the surface of everything you do. But the second you date her - those politics will come into play and the intimate time you spend together will not be so easy.
Sure there is money involved. But that does not make an interaction between an SP and a client who care for each other
any less special. I think one mistake a lot of people make is thinking that relationships can exist in only one form - and so many people take what they are experiencing and force it into that Girlfriend-boyfriend or husband0-wife box and things just get crushed and distorted and ruined. Once people realize that this form of commitment is not the defining factor of happiness, and that other forms are not morally wrong, everyone will breathe a lot easier and live a lot longer. Imagine how much stressed we would all be in the long run! And really why would you need her to be a girlfriend, after all, when your in a relationship, you savor the times you are alone together without distraction or interruption. When you are with her as an SP that is the ONLY kind of time you have together. So once again. Just enjoy it.
So my advice culminates in this: Why ruin a good thing! Reality is not so pleasant, and enjoying someone for an hour is hardly a prelude to enjoying them for a lifetime. But that does not lessen the significance of that hour. Let yourself get lost in the pleasure, enjoy her, thank her, and keep the memories as a warm reminder that there is good in the world. Be glad that you could experience that wonderful feeling of falling in love (and usually falling in love is a lot more fun then BEING in love). Really the beauty of the relationship between an SP and a client, there are no strings attatched, and compared to a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship there are relatively few expectations. Its a pretty uncomplicated form of interaction with someone, and in a way very relieving. And its so much easier to enjoy time with someone when there are absolutely no relationship politics brewing under the surface of everything you do. But the second you date her - those politics will come into play and the intimate time you spend together will not be so easy.
Sure there is money involved. But that does not make an interaction between an SP and a client who care for each other
any less special. I think one mistake a lot of people make is thinking that relationships can exist in only one form - and so many people take what they are experiencing and force it into that Girlfriend-boyfriend or husband0-wife box and things just get crushed and distorted and ruined. Once people realize that this form of commitment is not the defining factor of happiness, and that other forms are not morally wrong, everyone will breathe a lot easier and live a lot longer. Imagine how much stressed we would all be in the long run! And really why would you need her to be a girlfriend, after all, when your in a relationship, you savor the times you are alone together without distraction or interruption. When you are with her as an SP that is the ONLY kind of time you have together. So once again. Just enjoy it.
Re: This has been ....
By your logic when a shoplifter steals something it's the store's fault for not bolting everything down to the shelves.
Nice compassion. An escort takes advantage of my trust and it's my fault. When you see someone fall down do you go over and kick them as well?Mystique Misty said:Average Joe ..... I would like to know how you were conned by an Sp ? It is my belief that you cant be conned into anything its your choice weather or not to say no and it is not the SP's fault that you gave in ( although I do not believe any SP has the right to ask or beg for money or a tip ) .
By your logic when a shoplifter steals something it's the store's fault for not bolting everything down to the shelves.
Well said dudelove again. How about collecting social assistance from the government to boot??? Nice racket, huh. Us poor soles work are asses off, pay our taxes, spend net $ on these ladys, because we are horny. This will never change. Men will pay for a good piece of ass till the end of time. I just hope some day that these girls understand what it is like to make a normal living, working 40 to 60 hours /week, 45% going to taxes, and walk around with a smile on your face.
Welcome to mr. or mrs. or ms. play by the rules outstanding citizen!
There is an old expression. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW!!
Until you know what games are being played, you will never know how stupid you have been to live by the "RULES" all these years!!!!!! I know better now. Thank you.
Welcome to mr. or mrs. or ms. play by the rules outstanding citizen!
There is an old expression. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW!!
Until you know what games are being played, you will never know how stupid you have been to live by the "RULES" all these years!!!!!! I know better now. Thank you.
yoniluvrca-posted before as chaosmagi
>> Happiness is a rare thing to find in this day and age, and if someone can find that by spending some time with me - *blush* Well really, how much more flattering can one be!<<
True happiness is a rare jewel and to find it anywhere is indeed a gift. The thing to look at though is that word "true". True happiness comes from within. This is not to say that another person(or car,computer,diamond necklace,what ever it is) can not stimulate this feeling of happines. But where does this happiness actually come from? It comes from the person who feels the happiness-not from the event that causes, or appears to cause the happiness. Some cultures celebrate a death with at least an equal ammount of joy bthat they celebrate a death. They are not stupid or mislead, they simply see death in a different light than we do.
This is why I fall in love with anything or anything I can for as long as it lasts and why falling in love with an sp can be such a great experience. It is unlikly that you will get what you want-everlasting romantic love-but you will certainly learn something about yourself which for me is the real purpose of being on this planet.
Also there is alot of talk about fantasy in this thread. Actually falling in love is always a fantasy. Falling in love is always about our projection of the person with whom we fall in love and never about the actual person. We rarely even see the person until the love chemials leave the system several months or in some cases years later(some cases the next morning). Seeing this will not save you from loves' illusion but it can help you laugh about it and perhaps to help you from spending a fortune on what is essentially a really good fantasy(sorry girls).
>> Happiness is a rare thing to find in this day and age, and if someone can find that by spending some time with me - *blush* Well really, how much more flattering can one be!<<
True happiness is a rare jewel and to find it anywhere is indeed a gift. The thing to look at though is that word "true". True happiness comes from within. This is not to say that another person(or car,computer,diamond necklace,what ever it is) can not stimulate this feeling of happines. But where does this happiness actually come from? It comes from the person who feels the happiness-not from the event that causes, or appears to cause the happiness. Some cultures celebrate a death with at least an equal ammount of joy bthat they celebrate a death. They are not stupid or mislead, they simply see death in a different light than we do.
This is why I fall in love with anything or anything I can for as long as it lasts and why falling in love with an sp can be such a great experience. It is unlikly that you will get what you want-everlasting romantic love-but you will certainly learn something about yourself which for me is the real purpose of being on this planet.
Also there is alot of talk about fantasy in this thread. Actually falling in love is always a fantasy. Falling in love is always about our projection of the person with whom we fall in love and never about the actual person. We rarely even see the person until the love chemials leave the system several months or in some cases years later(some cases the next morning). Seeing this will not save you from loves' illusion but it can help you laugh about it and perhaps to help you from spending a fortune on what is essentially a really good fantasy(sorry girls).
Serenity and Yoniluvrca :
Thank you for the insightful comments !
I fell in love with my favourite SP and am still in love with her now. What has changed though is the quality of the love : At first it was the traditional possessive kind -, the one which goes with jealousy and demands mutual exclusivity - until I realized how self-destructive this would be.
The love I feel for her now is totally different - it is based on gratefulness for the incredible sex we are enjoying together and on the general sense of an almost child-like happiness I am feeling whenever we are together.
Obviously, there are no demands being made beyond being there for each other whenever we meet.
Thank you for the insightful comments !
I fell in love with my favourite SP and am still in love with her now. What has changed though is the quality of the love : At first it was the traditional possessive kind -, the one which goes with jealousy and demands mutual exclusivity - until I realized how self-destructive this would be.
The love I feel for her now is totally different - it is based on gratefulness for the incredible sex we are enjoying together and on the general sense of an almost child-like happiness I am feeling whenever we are together.
Obviously, there are no demands being made beyond being there for each other whenever we meet.
