Dishonesty easy to see and what to do about it.
- Thread starter freedomlover
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This morning, I thought about my predicament and decided to drop the relationship. A commentor suggested that I might have given off a vibe that caused the girl to react negatively to me. Actually, I never said a word about her lack of returning my email. She brough it up and then provided a false reason as to why she hadn't. I haven't even responded to her last email that contains the falsehoods. I havent reacted to anything. I have been a perfect, patient gentleman. But, it is still disappointing. Anyways, I am dropping this one. She is 43, and well, enough said. What 43 year old woman is worth taking crap from? At 43, most women are past their prime. Just saying.
My last girlfriend would lie constantly to me, even when I didnt get mad at her dishonesty. I actually only told my last girlfriend about my unhappiness in regards to her dishonesty after she broke up with me. I bit my tongue with her about 75 times, and only became vocal about it when she accused me of being disrespectful. And even then, I only stated the obvious so that we could have balance in our exchanges. Women are like spoiled little children. It never changes.
My last girlfriend would lie constantly to me, even when I didnt get mad at her dishonesty. I actually only told my last girlfriend about my unhappiness in regards to her dishonesty after she broke up with me. I bit my tongue with her about 75 times, and only became vocal about it when she accused me of being disrespectful. And even then, I only stated the obvious so that we could have balance in our exchanges. Women are like spoiled little children. It never changes.
Sorry bud but any man who can not and will not commincate with the women he is dating is being childish. Either that or you have no balls. 75 times???? and not a word???? Your fault bro.This morning, I thought about my predicament and decided to drop the relationship. A commentor suggested that I might have given off a vibe that caused the girl to react negatively to me. Actually, I never said a word about her lack of returning my email. She brough it up and then provided a false reason as to why she hadn't. I haven't even responded to her last email that contains the falsehoods. I havent reacted to anything. I have been a perfect, patient gentleman. But, it is still disappointing. Anyways, I am dropping this one. She is 43, and well, enough said. What 43 year old woman is worth taking crap from? At 43, most women are past their prime. Just saying.
My last girlfriend would lie constantly to me, even when I didnt get mad at her dishonesty. I actually only told my last girlfriend about my unhappiness in regards to her dishonesty after she broke up with me. I bit my tongue with her about 75 times, and only became vocal about it when she accused me of being disrespectful. And even then, I only stated the obvious so that we could have balance in our exchanges. Women are like spoiled little children. It never changes.
Newsflash - some people suck at being honest, especially when it comes to relationships.
Some people hate being the "bad guy" and find it difficult to dump. So, they lie and hope that the other person will find excuses to dump them.
Two important questions:
1. What kind of lies are we talking about? Big ones or little ones? I'm not saying that little ones are necessarily ok. If she's lying about why she isn't responsive, or making little white lies all over the place, she obviously doesn't respect you.
2. Might you be a wee bit obsessive about this? You keep track of lies (75 times???).
The bottom line is, relationships need trust. If you can't handle it, you shouldn't be in it. It's not hard to have that first talk. The next girl you meet, just tell her that you've been burned in the past and don't want to have it happen again. Just promise each other that you won't lie. Period. If she does, she's history.
Some people hate being the "bad guy" and find it difficult to dump. So, they lie and hope that the other person will find excuses to dump them.
Two important questions:
1. What kind of lies are we talking about? Big ones or little ones? I'm not saying that little ones are necessarily ok. If she's lying about why she isn't responsive, or making little white lies all over the place, she obviously doesn't respect you.
2. Might you be a wee bit obsessive about this? You keep track of lies (75 times???).
The bottom line is, relationships need trust. If you can't handle it, you shouldn't be in it. It's not hard to have that first talk. The next girl you meet, just tell her that you've been burned in the past and don't want to have it happen again. Just promise each other that you won't lie. Period. If she does, she's history.
Depends a lot on the woman too. Plenty of men are past their prime (whatever that means) at 43 too and some need to rely on blue pills.What 43 year old woman is worth taking crap from? At 43, most women are past their prime. Just saying.
Plenty of men are like this too.My last girlfriend would lie constantly to me, even when I didnt get mad at her dishonesty. I actually only told my last girlfriend about my unhappiness in regards to her dishonesty after she broke up with me. I bit my tongue with her about 75 times, and only became vocal about it when she accused me of being disrespectful. And even then, I only stated the obvious so that we could have balance in our exchanges. Women are like spoiled little children. It never changes.
Why e-mail back and forth? Pick up the phone or better yet talk in person! A lot less confusion that way IMO. It sounds like this girl was testing you: not replying to emails, and accusing you of being disrespectful. She's looking to see how you react under stress and you blew it. Generally speaking women (actually most people) want to be around people that have better control over their emotions. Don't know about you, but I can't stand people that easily lose their cool. The same goes with relationships.
You do seem to be over-analysing your situation and allowing baggage from one relationship spill into others. You do need to learn how to speak up for yourself in a assertive yet still kind way. Staying quiet for so long while she's lying and doing God knows what else just dug a bigger hole for you.
Do one of the hardest thing to do in your situation....Cut the cord!
You deserve to be happy & so does she, so based on what you have said, talk to her (to make sure that there are no strange circumstances) & if you do not get a satisfactory answer, move on! Excuses are cheap! IMHO
You deserve to be happy & so does she, so based on what you have said, talk to her (to make sure that there are no strange circumstances) & if you do not get a satisfactory answer, move on! Excuses are cheap! IMHO
