Send me in your place. With your money.
No guilt now !
Come on buddy....you don't need us to tell you what to do.
No guilt now !
Come on buddy....you don't need us to tell you what to do.
Dilemma!
- Thread starter bigtimedude
- Start date
GO FOR IT....there is no chance of getting caught.....enjoy yourself....she will never know..... & if you need a couple of referrals, just let us know
thanks for the answers guys. I appredciate them . Yes you are right I guess I do agree on the sliding scale. The fact is the place I would go, shes not even naked and there really isnt any sexual element to it, but you are right Im sure my wife wouldnt see it that way. As far as the whole addiction thing, secret cell phone etc. I think I can keep it to having a couple of massages a year. I ddont think its the best thing in the world, but i also dont think its the worst. Im not having an affair, Im not seeing an escort, theres no risk of bringing home disease etc. All rationalizations I suppose, but in the grand scheme of things? ?...
a question for those who say no. Would it be better to go to a strip club and get a lap dance, and have a girl sexually grinding all over me? On the sliding scale which is worse? A non sexual release provided as part ofd a massage by a fully clothed woman or a naked woman naked on my lap with both of us touching each other? Lets face it millions of married men go to strip clubs and dont consider it cheating, but the massage would be considered. I for one think the strip club is more sexual than the type of massage I described, how about you?
bigtimedude said:
You know I just don't get it......many of the guys on the board are married. We admit to being wired differently than women, to wanting numerous sexual experiences, to breath some of these ladies in.
Is the concern that BTD is recently married and that he should wait 7 years.
Have I been fooled all these years, are all you guys in your teens or early twenties, single or divorced. I've seen my share of wedding rings on the guys sitting in the lobby at HFH (but I guess you do that to keep the number of women chasing you to a minimum).
Hey, Bigtimedude,
You've been cruising the webpages of some of the more popular Massage Parlours (Spas) and checking out some of the ladies. You know that you can view the glorious shots of some of these glorious ladies, make the call and be enjoying the intimacy in an hour or two....
Moderation is the key as with everything else, ENJOY, be careful. Be respectful of the MPA you chose and especially respectful of your wife.
I still have difficulty with our guilt complex in North America. Many women in European countries are aware that their guys sometimes stray. They've told me that they'd rather it be a half hour encounter with a stranger than an affair, in some cases telling their men not to fall in love.....
bigtimedude said:
How about stop rationalizing and make up your mind......you now know how the majority of the responders feel.....it sounds to me like you're disappointed that you didn't get the, "....go for it dude.....she'll never know....get your rocks off guy.....the double standard is there for us to enjoy.....etc, etc". The fact that you received well considered and very ethical advice (surprise, surprise on TERB, lol) seems to have thrown a monkey wrench into your plans. It's almost as if had you received the green light here you could rationalize going for a sexual encounter. The whole, "but she has her clothes on", bullshit doesn't cut it buddy... blowing your load is sex. You know what the appropriate decision is....so make it and stop fucking around.
So there. lol
If you have guilt, don't do it. If you're just worried of being caught, then go for it. Chances of getting caught are slim to none.
For all the nay sayers, you're a bunch of hypocrites. After all, this is an ESCORT REVIEW BOARD.
For all the nay sayers, you're a bunch of hypocrites. After all, this is an ESCORT REVIEW BOARD.
So ask your wife. She is the only person who can answer the question.bigtimedude said:
Non sexual release? You, my friend, are delusional. LOLbigtimedude said:
Well, if millions of men say its not cheating, then I guess its not cheating. Go for it. That non sexual release isn't cheating either, really. So go for that too. And really, when you think of it, when you have intercourse with a condom, that's not really cheating either, because your penis technically isn't touching her vagina. Go for it.bigtimedude said:
LMAObigtimedude said:
I hate to poke yet another hole in your attempt to rationalize your behaviour but... while I agree that going with the guys to watch naked girls and drink beer is not considered cheating, the second you agree to a dance that all goes out the window. You're not paying a naked girl to NOT get excited - you're paying her to grind, you're paying to be able to touch her, and if all goes well you're paying her to give you a happy ending.
Whether its achieved with her lapdance, her hand or any other means, its cheating and I'm willing to bet that MOST guys know that (contrary to your "millions dont" theory).
The debate of where it falls on the "cheating scale" is immaterial. I'm not passing judgment, go have a blast and enjoy yourself, but at least be honest with yourself about what you're doing.
Well guys again thanks for the advice, although those that bashed me for looking for a green light were a little off base. I was simply tryig to gauge opinion. Macator thanks for your well thought out response. I do wonder if some of you are being a little hypocritical but nonetheless..
In the end I did not go, not because the guilt would be overwhelming but because the risk of getting caught and what I would lose, wife kid, family respect etc was simply not worth it,
Not that the temptation will go away but I guess its one of those things that a little prayer when the temptation arises may help.
Just an aside, it is extremely difficult, ive gone from a young man who (not bragging just trying to explain my history) has had sex with alot of women and has always been able to pick and chooose. to go from that and form a lifestyle where getting laid was the main purpose of the weekend every weekend, and then to be married and not have that variety and excitement anymore is extremely tough. I still have the desire to have sex with every hot girl I see and I dont think that will ever end, I guess I figure a massage was a less dangerous way of getting a little of that excitement back.
In the end I did not go, not because the guilt would be overwhelming but because the risk of getting caught and what I would lose, wife kid, family respect etc was simply not worth it,
Not that the temptation will go away but I guess its one of those things that a little prayer when the temptation arises may help.
Just an aside, it is extremely difficult, ive gone from a young man who (not bragging just trying to explain my history) has had sex with alot of women and has always been able to pick and chooose. to go from that and form a lifestyle where getting laid was the main purpose of the weekend every weekend, and then to be married and not have that variety and excitement anymore is extremely tough. I still have the desire to have sex with every hot girl I see and I dont think that will ever end, I guess I figure a massage was a less dangerous way of getting a little of that excitement back.
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