dealing with the loss of a pet

[D-Fens]

The healing process has started. I am going out to dinner tonight with some family. I think it's important I don't just mope around my place all day. My other parrots will be fine and just making this thread and seeing that there are others on here who went through the same thing and that I am not alone is comforting. She was in a lot of pain and suffering. I have to let go. It's better this way. Patrick Swayze said "We're all dying, it's just a matter of when" Every living thing on this planet has an expiry date. Hell most of species that have lived on this planet are already extinct.

death smiles at us all.. all we can do is smile back.

It's nice to know that there is more this site then just looking for sps that we are a close knit community and we can talk about all sorts of things.

 

[xmontrealer]

I am very sorry for your loss, D-Fens.

As it happens we had to put down our almost 14 year old dog just last Wednesday night.

He was doing quite well up until a month or two ago, for his age, but then started a steady decline. It got to the point last weekend where he would not eat anything, even his most favourite treats. He then stopped drinking water 2 days before the end.

There was no doubt that it was his time, but it was still emotionally extremely difficult to do. I must say the vet handled it with care and dignity, and his ultimate passing was very peaceful.

Now, though, I feel a huge loss, remembering the way he was when he was feeling well, and am more depressed than I could ever have imagined. He was truly a great friend, who gave us unconditional love. (Though I sometimes wonder how unconditional it might have been if he could talk. That may be one of the main problems between me and my wife. If only she would know when not to talk!)

Not to hijack the thread, but I am wondering what to say to the young children in our neighbourhood who used to love to come up and pat our dog when we would go for walks. I guess I'll just ask their parents what they might want me to say.

In some ways I have always viewed mourning in terms of radioactive "half-life". Over periods of time our grief diminishes by half, and then by half again, until after quite a while the grief becomes smaller than our fond memories, but still never entirely disappears.

 

[explorerzip]

I lost my Golden Retriever years ago to a sudden heart attack so I totally relate. Came home one night and he was acting very strange. Tried to rush him to the pet hospital, but poor guy probably died in my arms. It was over so quickly. Sorry for your loss. I also would suggest not to replace your parrot so soon. Death is something that you have to come to grips with no matter how painful. Replacing a pet right away doesn't seem right to me.

 

[legmann]

Don't be afraid to talk to a professional counsellor; if you have access to an Employee Assistance Program through work, make use of it.

 

[shakenbake]

Thanks for all the support. However right now, i don't think I'm ready for another parrot. I need more time.

Everything in time. Take care of yourself. When the time comes, you may want to consider enriching the life of another pet and having your life enriched by one, at the same time.

 

[Cassidy-Jasmine]

I'm sorry for your loss. They really are our best friends, companions and family. They depend on us for food, water and shelter and we depend on them for love. And it's not so easy when that love is gone. Truly sorry.

 

[Mikehorn]

So sorry for your loss D-Fens. I kept busy with work etc., spent extra time with family (it was right before the holidays that it happened). Also, I would suggest browsing the online adoptions (if they exist for parrots) but don't do anything about it for a few months, until you have time to grieve. When I lost my cat I was tempted to adopt another right away, but I was glad I waited a few months until I was emotionally ready. You can still talk to her, her spirit may be lingering with you still.

 

[stinkynuts]

I'm sorry for your loss. I know how devastating it is to lose a pet. But, as they say, time heals all wounds.

I hope you take comfort in the fact that your bird was given a wonderful life, with lots of love, something many animals aren't given.

 

[trm]

Grief is the natural reaction, take as much time as you need. You will get over this and at some point you should consider another bird. After my cat died in 2011 I was heartbroken. A month later I went to a shelter and found a new cat that I love as much as I did the old one. She filled the void very well.

 

[Corey]

My condolences. Having gone through it relatively recently, I also suggest you give yourself as much time as possible to let yourself heal. It could be a few weeks, a few months...

Cry it out and let it come out when it does.

Time will also dull the pain. The pain may never completely go away but it will dull the sharpness you're feeling now.

 

[D-Fens]

I will getting another parrot.. I'm not sure when but I will start looking again soon.

 

[quicksilver]

Losing a pet is awful, they really are members of your family. I don't think there's any one 'right' way to deal with it - and it sounds like you're taking a healthy approach. Admit your grief, don't try to suppress it, let the recovery process go for as long as it takes.

I lost my 18-year old cat a few years ago and I felt awful about it for quite a while. But after the pain had lessened a bit, my partner said she thought we should start thinking about get another cat - we got two kittens who are now two years old and I'm happy every day to have them. When it's the right time, you'll know.

 

[fuji]

A big reason for giving kids pets is to help them learn life lessons. What responsibility means, and eventually, coping with death and grief.

 

[hans4u]

So sorry D Fens to hear about your feathered friend. You were kind and brought as much joy to it as it did to you!
There was a line out of the movie Shadowlands that asked,Why love is leaving hurts so much...the pain now is the happiness then.. that's the deal."

I found this link about dealing with parrot loss for you.
Hope it helps.

http://thegabrielfoundation.org/education/parrot-loss-support/

I truly believe we will see our pets again someday and I pray for you and the joy of holding your loved friend again. The one who designed your beautiful parrot and painted the amazing colours promises to give us the desires of our hearts!
The sun will rise again for you.

 

[D-Fens]

I have had pets die on me before. I had a lovely little budgie that died of old age however I had time to make peace with it because I saw it coming. I also felt at peace because he had lived a long and happy life. The reason why this has hit me so hard is because it happened quite suddenly so I didn't have time to process it. I have decided to get a new feathered buddy to fill the void in my heart. I don't know when though I don't think I am totally ready yet. But I will be in time. When a pet dies it is normal to feel like you don't want another one that you don't want to go through that again but you can't help it... Pets whether they are birds or cats.. Or whatever.. They just steal your heart...

 

[demien2k5]

I have had pets die on me before. I had a lovely little budgie that died of old age however I had time to make peace with it because I saw it coming. I also felt at peace because he had lived a long and happy life. The reason why this has hit me so hard is because it happened quite suddenly so I didn't have time to process it. I have decided to get a new feathered buddy to fill the void in my heart. I don't know when though I don't think I am totally ready yet. But I will be in time. When a pet dies it is normal to feel like you don't want another one that you don't want to go through that again but you can't help it... Pets whether they are birds or cats.. Or whatever.. They just steal your heart...

Hey D-Fens. Don't know for sure, but it might help you to continue to focus on the positives. In that spirirt, would love to hear more about your Parrot in terms of his look, his personality, any quirks in his character - just anything at all that made him so loved and cherished in your eyes. You might find that sharing the terrific things brings some peace to your heart.

 

[K Douglas]

I'm sorry for your loss. They really are our best friends, companions and family. They depend on us for food, water and shelter and we depend on them for love. And it's not so easy when that love is gone. Truly sorry.

Pets provide us with unconditional love and loyalty. Very therapeutic. My condolences to you D-Fens. I remember having to put down two pets including my beloved golden retriever a few years ago (damn they are the best). I don't think I can offer you any advice other than you have to move on with our life. Try to keep your mind occupied with other things - whether it be work, sports or hobbies.