I've watched a couple episodes of the reality show Dating in the Dark recently. The premise is basically six strangers (3 male and 3 female) "date" eachother in a pitch black room. Near the end they choose whoever they think they're most compatible with. Then after seeing what the person looks like, they decide whether they'd like to go on a real date.
On one episode I watched, all three women chose the same guy since he had a nice body, and they all seemed to have great chemistry with him (of course). But after he was revealed, they all rejected him, while of course he was happy to meet with all of them. And get this: he was not only ripped but had a good looking face too, while these women were all mediocre at best!
Honestly, he was probably an 8. The 4 who rejected him said she was used to dating guys who were more attractive. I had to laugh, but sadly it was probably true. The 5 and 6 both complained he didn't look rugged enough and that his face was too boyish.
The other episode didn't paint women much better. The only guy who really succeeded was this dashing Jude Law look-a-like who was ecstatic to land a date with this really plain girl. And after the other girls found out he was "hot," they said they would've changed who they picked as matches, even though they had no chemistry with this guy and a lot of chemistry with who they did pick.
This other guy (a 6) also scored a date with some 7, but it was clear she only agreed to it because she felt obligated due to how well they got along in the dark room. She even hinted at no longer being attracted to him and only seeing him as a brotherly type.
Then there was the couple who had probably the most passionate kiss of any of them while in the dark room. After this encounter, the chick (a 9) said, "I hope when all is revealed I don't get some guy who looks like Shrek." Well, as turned out the guy was about a 5, and how does she react? She starts crying. Whether this reaction came about from the regret of having an average guy touch her or genuine bad feelings about her shallowness I can't say. At the end, the camera panned to the guy's face as he saw his match leaving the house instead of meeting him out on the porch. He looked like a beaten down dog.
Also, apparently in some other episode, a really handsome brown guy that spoke six languages ended up getting rejected by a below average looking woman because of his "receding hairline." I wish I was making this up.
A running theme throughout all this was how the guys were slobbering all over the women. These women could've had big purple moles covering half their faces or some other hideous deformity for all these guys knew, but they didn't care. They were just glad to be getting anything from any female. I wanted to reach through the screen, grab them and say, "Be a little selective for Christ's sake!" But then I realized they don't have a choice, given their position of scarcity. I see this kind of behavior all the time in real life too. It dominates damn near every male-female interaction. And I believe the biological imperative is but a small part of it. More than anything, it's a testament to how desperate and deprived of physical intimacy the vast majority of guys are.
For the longest time I tried convincing myself that it wasn't all about looks; the reality was just too painful for me to accept. But after a while I couldn't help but adopt a different, more realistic stance. Not just because of this one show, but because of everything I've witnessed over the years. They guys I've known who get girls don't do or say anything special for the most part. They're just not complete jackasses, and their looks basically do the talking for them. It all makes so much sense now.
Of course things like charm can help a BIT, but without the looks they're meaningless. And women are far more picky about looks than they are those other essentials, and they'll NEVER go for someone on their level. In a lot of cases they won't even go for someone who isn't at least 5 points higher than them. So even if you're a good looking guy, you're going to have it tough. If you're average, you better make at least 200 grand a year (which could take a while) or have some really high social status or something else that girls can use while they bang good looking guys on the side, or just pray you'll get so incredibly lucky that one ugly girl will have you. If you're below average, better have that local escort service on speed dial.
Buh buh buh looks don't matter that much. It's all about confidence...
Just so we're clear, I'm not bitter, nor do I hate women. I'm just sick of people saying looks aren't that important, when they're by far the most important factor there is. Guys deserve to know the truth so they can at least have a fighting chance.
On one episode I watched, all three women chose the same guy since he had a nice body, and they all seemed to have great chemistry with him (of course). But after he was revealed, they all rejected him, while of course he was happy to meet with all of them. And get this: he was not only ripped but had a good looking face too, while these women were all mediocre at best!
Honestly, he was probably an 8. The 4 who rejected him said she was used to dating guys who were more attractive. I had to laugh, but sadly it was probably true. The 5 and 6 both complained he didn't look rugged enough and that his face was too boyish.
The other episode didn't paint women much better. The only guy who really succeeded was this dashing Jude Law look-a-like who was ecstatic to land a date with this really plain girl. And after the other girls found out he was "hot," they said they would've changed who they picked as matches, even though they had no chemistry with this guy and a lot of chemistry with who they did pick.
This other guy (a 6) also scored a date with some 7, but it was clear she only agreed to it because she felt obligated due to how well they got along in the dark room. She even hinted at no longer being attracted to him and only seeing him as a brotherly type.
Then there was the couple who had probably the most passionate kiss of any of them while in the dark room. After this encounter, the chick (a 9) said, "I hope when all is revealed I don't get some guy who looks like Shrek." Well, as turned out the guy was about a 5, and how does she react? She starts crying. Whether this reaction came about from the regret of having an average guy touch her or genuine bad feelings about her shallowness I can't say. At the end, the camera panned to the guy's face as he saw his match leaving the house instead of meeting him out on the porch. He looked like a beaten down dog.
Also, apparently in some other episode, a really handsome brown guy that spoke six languages ended up getting rejected by a below average looking woman because of his "receding hairline." I wish I was making this up.
A running theme throughout all this was how the guys were slobbering all over the women. These women could've had big purple moles covering half their faces or some other hideous deformity for all these guys knew, but they didn't care. They were just glad to be getting anything from any female. I wanted to reach through the screen, grab them and say, "Be a little selective for Christ's sake!" But then I realized they don't have a choice, given their position of scarcity. I see this kind of behavior all the time in real life too. It dominates damn near every male-female interaction. And I believe the biological imperative is but a small part of it. More than anything, it's a testament to how desperate and deprived of physical intimacy the vast majority of guys are.
For the longest time I tried convincing myself that it wasn't all about looks; the reality was just too painful for me to accept. But after a while I couldn't help but adopt a different, more realistic stance. Not just because of this one show, but because of everything I've witnessed over the years. They guys I've known who get girls don't do or say anything special for the most part. They're just not complete jackasses, and their looks basically do the talking for them. It all makes so much sense now.
Of course things like charm can help a BIT, but without the looks they're meaningless. And women are far more picky about looks than they are those other essentials, and they'll NEVER go for someone on their level. In a lot of cases they won't even go for someone who isn't at least 5 points higher than them. So even if you're a good looking guy, you're going to have it tough. If you're average, you better make at least 200 grand a year (which could take a while) or have some really high social status or something else that girls can use while they bang good looking guys on the side, or just pray you'll get so incredibly lucky that one ugly girl will have you. If you're below average, better have that local escort service on speed dial.
Buh buh buh looks don't matter that much. It's all about confidence...
Just so we're clear, I'm not bitter, nor do I hate women. I'm just sick of people saying looks aren't that important, when they're by far the most important factor there is. Guys deserve to know the truth so they can at least have a fighting chance.
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