Coffee? Drinks? Does anyone actually do this?

JoyfulC

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Sep 23, 2004
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Lately I've been getting a lot of requests to go for coffee or drinks prior to meeting. It's out of the question for me, as I have a personal life I'm busy with in between sessions.

But I'm wondering... does anyone actually do this?

..c..
 
It's an interesting question, we should get together and talk about it over drinks. ;)

Seriously, it sounds like too much to ask since it would take a lot of your time. I can see a rare occasion where a woman wants to meet a client first if she's unsure about him.
 
I prefer to meet for sex and have coffee after .... but that's just me

:rolleyes:
 
Hi Joyful,

On quite a few occasions I have been asked to meet for coffee or drinks before having a meeting with a client. I have done it, and often it works out well for me. I seem to have the odd (but not bad) luck of getting a lot of first-timers who are nervous about the whole thing, and they often want to meet first. If my schedule permits (or if they offer me nice wine :-) I often oblige.
 
Joyful:

The other way around, fairly rare. Jasmin used to screen prospective clients this way - it gave her a controlled way of sorting out the good from the others.

As a request to providers, I think it could be a huge time sink. As Barbara points out, first timers might find it beneficial, but I think you would need to use your own judgement as to whether to oblige or encourage this.

Good luck.
 
Oh it CAN be a huge time sink. Some guys just want to see me and spend time with me without actually booking time with me. But then there are others where it pays off to oblige them. And then there are the others who leave you stood up at the coffee shop when you could be seeing actual clients. It's all a mixed bag in this business.
 
It is quite common among fetish mistresses I have met, a non-scene meeting in a neutral public place to discuss fetishes, etc. before committing to the action.

As well, it is often close to the woman's home/facility and she wants to feel comfortable with the new client before letting him know where the action takes place.

But I've not heard of it much with vanilla ladies.
 
JoyfulC said:
Lately I've been getting a lot of requests to go for coffee or drinks prior to meeting. It's out of the question for me, as I have a personal life I'm busy with in between sessions.

But I'm wondering... does anyone actually do this?

..c..



I don't do it! Either they wouldn't show which is a pretty big problem, especially with some of the guys from Quest, or they would want to just hang out, no services. I also just don't have time. I don't recommend it. Just an opinion.
 
Time is money in every business. I would never expect an SP to do it for free. However a little personal contact outside the bedroom will set the mood and tone for me.
 
frasier said:
Time is money in every business. I would never expect an SP to do it for free. However a little personal contact outside the bedroom will set the mood and tone for me.


hey i agree! if u pay first then we can do whatever! but most guys asking to meet first is not exactly that case. at least not with my experiences.
 
Ok I'm going out on a limb here, but I can tell you all that one of the reasons that I will agree to meet people beforehand is because I really want them to like me. I'm afraid of offending someone and having it hurt me in some way later on. Sad, I know, but there you have it.
 
I'd encourage this kind of pre-session date. I mean I think it would be a great way to get to feel out the client or on the other hand the SP. I can see how it would be a waste of time if it was only going to result in an hour session or what not, but if the eventual date was an extended session, it would make alot of sense. And of coruse, you'll know the lady likes you when they ask you out for coffee or dinner after the session is over, or even on another day. I guess I have been lucky...
 
I'm surprised to see it does happen sometimes. Myself, I just wouldn't have the time. As it is, I get enough e-mail and phone calls from guys who are "new" (or so they say -- sometimes they seem awfully knowledgeable!). I always figured most were "tire kickers" -- guys who were just looking for some entertainment, but who weren't willing to go all the way. Goodness knows, it's a common human trait. You have no idea how many people have backed me into corners at parties to bore me with a 20-minute story of the time they ALMOST made a skydive! For some people, "almost" is as much excitement as they can bear ... or afford.

Barbara, for me, if someone makes an appointment and it's obvious that they're either just too nervous to go through with it, or for whatever reason, I'm not what they expected, then I have no problem with calling the whole thing off, with neither of us having wasted anything more than our time. I don't charge a cancellation fee, and so I don't see a need to meet ahead. It's more of a risk and liability to me than a benefit.

One huge concern I'd have about meeting in a public place for coffee or drinks, however, is it might be a violation of the Criminal Code if specific services were discussed. A friend of mine got taken down this way once! A "client" asked her to meet him in the bar downstairs instead of coming up to his room. Next thing you know, she's in handcuffs. I suppose the opposite could happen just as easily to a customer -- it serves to read and understand the Criminal Code.

..c..
 
hodderbk said:
one of the reasons that I will agree to meet people beforehand is because I really want them to like me.

Hell, I like you and I've never even met you!!!!!
;)
 
hodderbk said:
Ok I'm going out on a limb here, but I can tell you all that one of the reasons that I will agree to meet people beforehand is because I really want them to like me. I'm afraid of offending someone and having it hurt me in some way later on. Sad, I know, but there you have it.

Oh Barbara, you are such a beautiful woman, how could they not love you!!! I was smitten at my first gaze of those eyes.

When are we going 'faxing again??

E
 
hodderbk said:
Ok I'm going out on a limb here, but I can tell you all that one of the reasons that I will agree to meet people beforehand is because I really want them to like me. I'm afraid of offending someone and having it hurt me in some way later on. Sad, I know, but there you have it.

That's a tall order...I wish you good luck trying to please everybody. I usually doesn't work.
Be yourself, some will like you and some don't..that's life.
 
Another way to look at it is a cost of doin business! In many other business people offer free estimates, free appraisals, ect... It may be a waste in some cases, but may get you a long term repeat customer.
 
Not for free!

JoyfulC said:
Lately I've been getting a lot of requests to go for coffee or drinks prior to meeting. It's out of the question for me, as I have a personal life I'm busy with in between sessions.

But I'm wondering... does anyone actually do this?

..c..


I do recall reading a lady's page a while back who had a rate for these "coffee" meetings. Can't recall who offhand.

Probably not worth the time for a top-level SP like yourself.

Best,

Damon