I was out yesterday at a festival, and couldn't help but gawk at all the tight ass walking around. I'd really like to meet awoman who I'm attracted to and have a relationship. I am pretty shy around strangers though, and all the dates/girlfriends I've had were through online dating. Most hot girls travel in pairs I have noticed, and I'm usually wither alone or with a buDdy who is in a relationship or just not wing man material. I am tall and have been told I'm good looking, but I lack in the social skills area (aspergers) and have always been very frustrated with women (hence I see sp's). I have looked at some of the e books like double your dating, but haven't been able to make something out of it. I would prefer to be myself (but emphasize my good qualities), the "cocky funny" thing is very hard to pull off right and I'm not interested in just acting obnoxiousin ppublic. Anyone here have any tips to share?
approaching women in public
- Thread starter desert monk
- Start date
You could start by not "gawk[ing] at all the tight ass walking around."
If you really have Aspergers (as opposed to self-diagnosed), there are lots of websites out there with advice on how to mimic normal human interactions. You need to master basic social skills, then move on to advanced stuff like hittin' on random chicks in public. That's like the hardest social interaction there is. You don't go straight to the Olympics, man.
If you really have Aspergers (as opposed to self-diagnosed), there are lots of websites out there with advice on how to mimic normal human interactions. You need to master basic social skills, then move on to advanced stuff like hittin' on random chicks in public. That's like the hardest social interaction there is. You don't go straight to the Olympics, man.
They like bold and obnoxious guys who don't care about being rejected.It's shows confidence.
Many these days prefer certain races,income groups and material assets.
You got to respect their choices and understand that they would be willing to give more slack to some guys than others.
Bottom line though is "No guts No Glory" so you got to try. The more hits the greater chance of success.
Just be polite and know when to move on.
Some guys are able to pull off the obnoxious "I want to fuck you" quite easily without offending the girl.
This is in part to her attraction to him or him fitting in with her choices that she couldn't care less about rudeness. She is willing to see it as confidence rather than rudeness from him but not from another guy.
Different strokes for different folks and always be polite even if she is not.
If obnoxious and rude is not you and as you say you are looking for genuine relationships rather than superficial ones just be yourself and take it slowly.
Start with small talk and work your way up. Not too long on the small talk. In high school girls got mad at me for this. Coulda moved to the next stage faster and fucked more of them but.
Many these days prefer certain races,income groups and material assets.
You got to respect their choices and understand that they would be willing to give more slack to some guys than others.
Bottom line though is "No guts No Glory" so you got to try. The more hits the greater chance of success.
Just be polite and know when to move on.
Some guys are able to pull off the obnoxious "I want to fuck you" quite easily without offending the girl.
This is in part to her attraction to him or him fitting in with her choices that she couldn't care less about rudeness. She is willing to see it as confidence rather than rudeness from him but not from another guy.
Different strokes for different folks and always be polite even if she is not.
If obnoxious and rude is not you and as you say you are looking for genuine relationships rather than superficial ones just be yourself and take it slowly.
Start with small talk and work your way up. Not too long on the small talk. In high school girls got mad at me for this. Coulda moved to the next stage faster and fucked more of them but.
Yeah I was diagnosed about 10 years ago. That would be interesting, I'll start looking for that I guess?
I was approached yesterday by a very young polite young .. here is what he used .. he complimainted my arm tat and then my neck tat(dolphin) asked when I got it done cuz it looked fresh... then he went on to say the only thing prettier than my neck tat was my beautiful smile... I knew it was a line but it made me blush non the less.. and then he said to have a great day and walked away.... and then like 15 mins later we just happen to be in the same area again and he came up and asked my name and gave me his... its a shame he was was so young(17 or 18) and see I am still thinking about him as he left a very good impression on me ... simple sweet shows your interested but not desperate... and simply give her your e-mail address... the balls in her court now
+1. This dude's got it pretty much nailed.
You WILL get rejected. A LOT. And it's going to sting.
Don't take it personally because it's not. It just means that this particular woman, at that particular time, has something else going on in her life and isn't into being approached.
It's got nothing to do with you personally.
Best places to pick up? (Because that's the obvious next question.) Well, let's start with the WORST place to pick up a woman: at a bar, club or gym. If you want to go dance, go dance. If you'd like to have a few at a bar, then have a few at a bar. If you feel like working out, then go work out. But don't go to those places expecting to come home with someone.
Best places? In my experience, they are:
- Grocery store
- Library
- Friend of a friend
- Walking the dog (wiggle has got it right)
Hangman has also got it right. Start with normal, human interactions before jumping in to the deep end of the mating pool.
Try this, it's very easy and just opens up conversation even if it's only for 2 sentences: I assume that you go to the grocery store on occasion. Pick out someone in the vegetable aisle. Doesn't haveto be a hot chick, she could be someone's grandmother. (Seriously. Trust me on this.) Let's say she's getting tomatoes. Go to where she's looking and ask her, "I'm a bit of a dunce at these things. How do you know which tomatoes are the best?"
The point is not to study tomatoes and not to pick up someone's grandmother. It's just a way to start everyday, normal human interactions.
Good luck. Report back.
Uhhh ... maybe he was stalking you?
Compliments you, then walks away .... figures out your direction and circles or follows you and accidentally bumps into you again?
I do it all the time at clubs! LOL
it was not stalking .. but of course he made sure he "bumped" into me again.. it was harmless .. I was not at a club I was at a sears outlet store by myself..lol he "bumped" into me again on his way to checkout....lol I knew what was going on ... but the point I was trying to make was that if you are polite and not creepy and can make the girl smile she will remember you
Three 'accidental' encounters in a Sears Outlet ... hmmmmm ... yup .... stalking.
You should have jumped his bones... he probably would have remembered you fondly for the rest of his life!
When I was 18 it happened to me and I still remember her fondly to this day. Wasn't expecting something right out of a porn movie and it ranks up there with my best sexual experiences ever (despite being nervous as hell!!!!).... never saw her again and saw 100's of galls after her but she has a special place on my wall of fame!
there was only 1... he was looking at the cds before I ever got there ... why is it so hard for guys to believe it was harmless.. helll no wonder you guys are afraid to approach women.. YOU FREAK YOURSELVES OUT.....
I was on my own personal time.. And I did not want to...You should have jumped his bones... he probably would have remembered you fondly for the rest of his life!
When I was 18 it happened to me and I still remember her fondly to this day. Wasn't expecting something right out of a porn movie and it ranks up there with my best sexual experiences ever (despite being nervous as hell!!!!).... never saw her again and saw 100's of galls after her but she has a special place on my wall of fame!
Was she better than a goat?You should have jumped his bones... he probably would have remembered you fondly for the rest of his life!
When I was 18 it happened to me and I still remember her fondly to this day. Wasn't expecting something right out of a porn movie and it ranks up there with my best sexual experiences ever (despite being nervous as hell!!!!).... never saw her again and saw 100's of galls after her but she has a special place on my wall of fame!
Ok, leave LR.s encounter out now before this thread gets more hijacked.
To the OP, the advice given regarding talking to women/girls in ordinary surroundings is the best for you to start. Also, if you do start a conversation with someone, don't confuse general genuine friendliness with romantic intentions.
It is often easy to start a harmless conversation in the checkout line, or somwhere that she will feel comfortable with other people around. Always be ready to accept the fact that she may not want to talk, so don't take it as rejection, it just wasn't the time nor the place.
Recently a girl started a conversation in line with me, we bantered back and forth and I asked if she wanted some company on the walk up the road. She said no, so as I was done first, I said have a good day and gave her a smile as I left. From other posts on this board, some guys would have felt rejected and moped about it. All it was, was some interaction between two people, nothing more. Some times it leads to more, most times it won't. If you don't try, it never will.
Just be yourself, if you try too hard to be something else, they can usually see through it and you won't succeed anyway. If you do make an impression, then you have to keep up the act which is even more difficult.
There are millions of people in the city, not all of them are meant for each other. Just take baby steps and se where it takes you.
To the OP, the advice given regarding talking to women/girls in ordinary surroundings is the best for you to start. Also, if you do start a conversation with someone, don't confuse general genuine friendliness with romantic intentions.
It is often easy to start a harmless conversation in the checkout line, or somwhere that she will feel comfortable with other people around. Always be ready to accept the fact that she may not want to talk, so don't take it as rejection, it just wasn't the time nor the place.
Recently a girl started a conversation in line with me, we bantered back and forth and I asked if she wanted some company on the walk up the road. She said no, so as I was done first, I said have a good day and gave her a smile as I left. From other posts on this board, some guys would have felt rejected and moped about it. All it was, was some interaction between two people, nothing more. Some times it leads to more, most times it won't. If you don't try, it never will.
Just be yourself, if you try too hard to be something else, they can usually see through it and you won't succeed anyway. If you do make an impression, then you have to keep up the act which is even more difficult.
There are millions of people in the city, not all of them are meant for each other. Just take baby steps and se where it takes you.
Too bad zardoz has gone away, or not, but his readings on approaching/stocking women in public places were informative and gave us a base line to work from.
No big mystery. If the girl isn't miles out of your league, just introduce yourself, maybe explain why you wanted to meet her, and try to make some smalltalk for a few minutes. Be yourself, and don't treat it like a game. Get her number, then ask her out sometime.
