any tips or advices on open relationship during marriage?

[coolmanfever]

hello all.

For those of your tried open relationship while in marriage, do you guys have any tips on making open relationship works during marriage.

After 3 years of marriage, My wife and I decided to be separated for a year to see if we are meant for each other and then we will decide whether we should continue with our marriage or divorce.

what do you guys think?

 

[waynward]

If you search Caleb Jones on youtube and go to his site. He has some good pragmatic tips on being in an open marriage. As he is in one himself and maintains seeing other women. And had previously had a closed marriage, which after his divorced he vowed to only be in open relationships.

Can't comment on anything other than that directly. As I have never been in an open marriage (or married) and have only had open relationships.

 

[Jasmina]

Open relationships are tricky and hard. They are more work than monogamy. I'd ask why you want that, or is it her that wants that? I'd also say, if your relationship is already in jeopardy, open relationship is probably not going to save it. You should consider focusing on fixing the existing issues first and foremost, before potentially piling on more issues, largely because I'd guess communication is already an issue and no open relationship will survive if communication isn't there.

 

[hipjdog]

If you're going to do, make sure you have set rules about what is and what is not allowed. Do these other people
come to your home? Do they meet your spouse? You need to have agreed upon ground rules.

hello all.

For those of your tried open relationship while in marriage, do you guys have any tips on making open relationship works during marriage.

After 3 years of marriage, My wife and I decided to be separated for a year to see if we are meant for each other and then we will decide whether we should continue with our marriage or divorce.

what do you guys think?
[/QUOTE

 

[y2kmark]

Determine beforehand who gives a fuck...

 

[kherg007]

A mate of mine had these rule w his mrs. (Well, her rules): not in our house, not anyone I know, always use protection.

 

[coolmanfever]

Thanks for all the comments.


We will be living in a different household and only see each during weekends and going on dates. If we both feel like having sex together during weekend, we will do.

She said she would like to go on dates with other guys but will not have sex them.

I told her that I don't plan to go out dates with other girls for a year. If I need sexual release I told her that I will just watch porn.

But I did not tell her that I will go see escort cuz I know she has concern that I may catch std.

 

[coolmanfever]

Open relationships are tricky and hard. They are more work than monogamy. I'd ask why you want that, or is it her that wants that? I'd also say, if your relationship is already in jeopardy, open relationship is probably not going to save it. You should consider focusing on fixing the existing issues first and foremost, before potentially piling on more issues, largely because I'd guess communication is already an issue and no open relationship will survive if communication isn't there.

We tried to work it out even talk to therapists. For her she feels that is the only way to figure out if this mirage is for her.

 

[Goodoer]

Thanks for all the comments.


We will be living in a different household and only see each during weekends and going on dates. If we both feel like having sex together during weekend, we will do.

She said she would like to go on dates with other guys but will not have sex them.

I told her that I don't plan to go out dates with other girls for a year. If I need sexual release I told her that I will just watch porn.

But I did not tell her that I will go see escort cuz I know she has concern that I may catch std.

Buddy… Don’t kid yourself, unless she’s going to go on only first dates, she’s going to fuck every guy because she easily can. (and she probably doesn’t care what you’ll do.)

You’re being set up to be her back up. Free yourself from this insanity. Start fresh with someone new where there is only your new future built together.

 

[xmontrealer]

It could be that she wants a "hunting license" from you to look for another guy, while not giving up the security of having you as her fall-back if she can't find someone suitable for a serious relationship.

Many women won't fully leave an existing relationship without having another one to go to.

 

[Butler1000]

Her girlfriends will be in her ear, telling her you are fucking other girls and she should get some too. Ylu can probably name the friends too.

 

[Brill]

But I did not tell her that I will go see escort cuz I know she has concern that I may catch std.

An open relationship starts with trust and complete honesty, you should tell her.

 

[Drakarys]

hello all.

For those of your tried open relationship while in marriage, do you guys have any tips on making open relationship works during marriage.

After 3 years of marriage, My wife and I decided to be separated for a year to see if we are meant for each other and then we will decide whether we should continue with our marriage or divorce.

what do you guys think?

You two don't have kids. Relationship is in a state of disarray. It seems like SHE is the driving force behind most of decisions. Therapy, separation, wanting to see other people.

I've seen this many times before. The moments a lady checks out is the moment a relationship is beyond saving.

This may or may not be true for your relationship, but if you truly care about her and wish to stay together - now is the time to act. Do whatever it takes to win her back, NOW or else it won't work out.

 

[Jenesis]

A mate of mine had these rule w his mrs. (Well, her rules): not in our house, not anyone I know, always use protection.

That is the standard for open relationship rules. It is all about respect for your partner. You are still in a relationship. You still have to work at it, communicate, make life decisions together, etc.

 

[GameBoy27]

Taking a break from each other almost always ends with the couple splitting up for good. Good luck with making it work, but the odds are not on your side.

 

[coolmanfever]

We will still live under the same roof. So I will try to my best to win her back.

As for telling her that I am seeing escort, it will be sure way to push her to end our marriage for sure. I see escort just for physical sexual release and short fun just like jerk off to porn. That is it.

This is just part of me that I will never share with anyone whether in this mirrage or next one. I am sure many guys feel the same.

 

[Valcazar]

This is a pretty good resource.

More Than Two | Welcome to More Than Two

www.morethantwo.com

As Jasmina said, it isn't a fix generally. It will only be helpful if the inability to be open had already been identified as the main problem. If other things are the problem, it isn't going to help/

There are no standard rules. There are some that are more commonly found, but you always have to find the things that work for you both and make sure that's actually working.

And don't let people give you shit about the living apart thing - that's more common than most people realize.

APARTNERS

apartnersthemovie.com

 

[jcpro]

I'm not sure if this has been said, but just move on. If she agreed to live separately, you're not the man for her.

 

[rhuarc29]

It could be that she wants a "hunting license" from you to look for another guy, while not giving up the security of having you as her fall-back if she can't find someone suitable for a serious relationship.

Yeah....that's what I read into it as well. OP is pretty much presenting her a new boyfriend on a silver platter, with none of the risk of doing the responsible thing and ending the relationship. Puzzling.
I don't see an open marriage working if they're already at the stage of separating for a year, even if his wife did have good intentions, which I suspect she doesn't.

 

[xix]

Why do people assume the woman will date other guys?
Maybe she will experiment with other women or LGBTQ2S+ . What ever that relationship is called. Don't know and I don't care because they keep changing the words every week.

The relationship is over. It's time to close that chapter in life and move on. I have a feeling she is co-dependent and is looking for another partner to move in with. She can't be alone.