Aging question and advice

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xyphy

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Oct 2, 2001
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I just wanted to throw this out there to see if anyone else is going through anything similar.
I'm mid 50's, fit, no health issues. Super active with fitness and life. "semi-retired-ish". Enough money to basically do whatever I want. Lots of free time.
Married, but no sex for ages, that's another issue, menopause, life etc.

Lately, I'll find myself in a situation where I have the time, the money and the ability to go to any SP, agency or spa. but I just don't want to.
It's not like I'm not horny, I tend to self fulfill it most of the time. but I could be going 2-3X/week and I just don't.
It's kind of a mental thing, where I can't be bothered, not into it and the chase/hunt doesn't really do it for me anymore.
Have any of you gents gone through periods like this when you can, but you don't...
 
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I did several years ago. I'm kind of hoping that feeling comes back sometime soon too because I'm hobbying too much. I think the fact that it is so easy to get made me bored of it for a while, along with some of the ladies I was really into had left the business. I just didn't feel like weeding through a bunch of new ladies to find those next ladies I was going to be into. I was off a while, dabbled a bit, an old fave came back and I'm back as active as ever
 
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This also sounds like some part of Grief / Loss / Abandonment / Pride.
Moving on is the hard part for anyone unless they're psycho paths, social paths and narcs.

Sometimes I look at photo of the SW and say to myself...
...will she be as good as the last one?
.. how fake is her photo?
... Can she replace the one that left me?
... Man that much she better be worth it...

Then I don't go. Then it was a good sign when she doesn't answer the door / DM.


20260815age
 
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I'm in stage 4.. I have four, maybe five regular ladies on rotation and I still love everything about it. Hope I never reach stage 5 where the excitement fades.
 
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Not sure everyone’s life experience is similar enough to put any part of it into progression categories like cancer, honestly.

But a genuine question. If you ever get bored, why not explore things you have never tried? Everything from alt, kink, role play, to just seeing a type of provider you haven’t seen before. If you go through all the ads and reviews, there is almost in unlimited number of things most guys haven’t tried. A sex worker doesn’t have to just be a 60-90 minute temporary substitute for a spouse who is no longer interested in sex. She can be what that wife never was.

You are never too old to try something new, but for a lot of guys, the 60s and 70s really aren’t the best time to do so as a result of decreased erections and flexibility. 50s seem the ideal time to cross everything off the list you haven’t done before.
 
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Patron said:
Not sure everyone’s life experience is similar enough to put any part of it into progression categories like cancer, honestly.

But a genuine question. If you ever get bored, why not explore things you have never tried? Everything from alt, kink, role play, to just seeing a type of provider you haven’t seen before. If you go through all the ads and reviews, there is almost in unlimited number of things most guys haven’t tried. A sex worker doesn’t have to just be a 60-90 minute temporary substitute for a spouse who is no longer interested in sex. She can be what that wife never was.

You are never too old to try something new, but for a lot of guys, the 60s and 70s really aren’t the best time to do so as a result of decreased erections and flexibility. 50s seem the ideal time to cross everything off the list you haven’t done before.
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Great advice, and I agree, but I think my issue is that during Stage 2 and 3 I did exactly that. I used to travel for work a lot, 3-4 x month to places like Montreal with incredible options and I had a room, time and money. I have done a lot if not all of the things that are on my list.
I suppose I'm entering that time in life where I am slowing down and need to embrace it.
 
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I guess I watch too much fetish porn, and I need to do things several times since I am terrible at them at first. So I still have a long list.

Another thing to think about that, in my opinion, leans toward doing this a lot now, is that I am pessimistic about the future.

The “kids” just aren’t out there. Sorry if that sounds terrible.

But for a very long time, there was a new crop of 18-22 year-olds entering the business every year. Now there aren’t. This is true in every market. It is of course worse in the United States where there are enormous barriers to entry for ladies needing to take out an ad as an independent and screen. But if you look closely even at the Toronto and Montreal agency rosters, it is different than a decade or two ago. Same with Lisbon and Western Europe in general.

I had a favorite in Texas who just left the business recently who was in her early 20s. I called her my hope for the future. I have never seen someone work the business harder. Every one of her customers loved her except for a few bitter guys who couldn’t afford her after she justifiably raised her rates. The same comment kept being made - she is the only GFE high-performing, kink friendly, stunningly beautiful college-aged girl in the business in Texas. Years ago, they were endless in Dallas and Austin.

She said her life was taking a different direction. I gave her my sincere thanks and expressed my genuine admiration of her, and she said she would let everyone know if she returns. There is a bit of a wind-down process for her since she has quite the customer base. Don’t know if there is a new boyfriend, a billionaire sugar daddy, or if she just needs a break. She is quite the memory, and I am glad I got to see her. And I hope we all didn’t burn her out. She talked about investing her significant earnings, so I am sure she will do quite well.

I love the rotation of ladies I see now, and the new ones I have on the travel schedule, but they are mostly in their 30s. A few hitting 40. Don’t get me wrong. At that age most of them are at the top of their game from a standpoint of the whole package. But let’s not kid ourselves. Only the rarest of the rare ladies is still at the top of the sex work game in her 40s and 50s. We have all had favorites who we made excuses to stop seeing after many years when we look up from DATY and thought, oh shit. Not the most appropriate thing to say on a shared hooker/john board, but the truth is the truth.

I am just not sure the current crop of 18-25 year olds are going to be have a percentage who choose to be great sex workers when they get a little bit older. They live at home, get parental support, text their parents about everything, and view almost everything in life as an insurmountable hurdle to be ignored or overanalyzed on Reddit. Some blame COVID. I simply do not know why. Most of the best sex workers now in their 30s were independent wild-child types when they were younger, even if they didn’t do sex work until a bit later. Younger women now just aren’t like that.

I honestly think for the most part this business for the most part lost a mini-generation. I think we are at the end of a Golden Age for this activity, and if you are in your 50s now, take a break, and want to come back to it a decade from now, you might be disappointed if you think you will find what is offered at present in terms of looks and services. I very sincerely hope I am wrong about that. But I want to hedge that risk by enjoying the present. I think that should be true for every John age group. This sex-worker “average age increasing” trend has been going on for several years now.
 
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Whatever you decide keep working the gear!
Even if just watching porn and jerking off. There is evidence that as you get older if you don't use it - you lose it.
Good luck!
 
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xyphy said:
I just wanted to throw this out there to see if anyone else is going through anything similar.
I'm mid 50's, fit, no health issues. Super active with fitness and life. "semi-retired-ish". Enough money to basically do whatever I want. Lots of free time.
Married, but no sex for ages, that's another issue, menopause, life etc.

Lately, I'll find myself in a situation where I have the time, the money and the ability to go to any SP, agency or spa. but I just don't want to.
It's not like I'm not horny, I tend to self fulfill it most of the time. but I could be going 2-3X/week and I just don't.
It's kind of a mental thing, where I can't be bothered, not into it and the chase/hunt doesn't really do it for me anymore.
Have any of you gents gone through periods like this when you can, but you don't...
Click to expand...
some random thoughts...i quit seeing escorts a long time ago for some of the reasons you outlined
For me it got too transactional.....i know i know..of course it is,,,but back in the day i could pick up a street walker to get satisfied or i could pick up the phone and call some one..either they answered or called me back....arranged a time and place..the convo lasted 2 or 3 minutes. just didnt seem transactional...but since i quit, now and again i get the urge but it goes away, once i realize arranging an Escort is like arranging a mortgage, or applying for a job...lol.....now i have a platonic relationship with a woman 15 years my junior..its enjoyable..but im shallow , immature, and superficial enough to admit the company of a 20 something would be kinda nice...but at my age , 76, i would have pay...just to have some eye candy to sit with having a lunch or strolling through a mall..or anything like that for an hour,,,and i would be happy.... people wuuld assume i was a grampa with my granddaughter lol...but now and again it would be fun...and i think i could carry on a convo with someone 50 years younger..or id like to think i could lol
 
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