Advancing an SP

D

Delta-Wye

Member
Mar 18, 2006
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Recently, my #1 girl asked if she could get an " advance " . I agreed , and was glad she felt comfortable enough with me to ask . It amounted to about two sessions worth and she was very grateful. Everything worked out fine and I was never concerned about the outcome . I have been wondering if anybody else has had a similar request ? Has it worked out okay? Did your mileage improve? Would you do it again?
 
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Your money but I would be very reluctant to give an SP money in advance . The horror stories are rampant of guys getting ripped off . Be interesting to see if she starts increasing how much of an advance she wants in future .
 
I have one buddy that does that (you know who you are)....it works for him

I guess its fine if you are comfortable in your "relationship" with her but i would never do that because in the end of the day...as much as you think you know her you probably dont and thats too much risk for my comfort level
 
Advances or borrowed money have never worked out well for me. Has she actually provided the sessions yet? Don't be surprised if you suddenly find her impossible to contact. She'll feel like why should she "work for free" for you now (for money she's already spent) when there are other guys waiting with money in hand.
 
I've done that with several SPs over the years. Only one took the money and ran. She gained $250 but she lost out on thousands. I still do it but I have a vetting process that includes after seeing the SP outside 'working' hours a few times. Mitigating risks goes both ways.
 
Did you get the sessions? Was she annoyed at having to provide the advanced sessions? Or were they as per usual?

My worry would be that she may be very short-term in her thinking and when it comes time to deliver her end of the bargain feel a little put off by having to do so.

Obviously the other worry would be never getting anything in return and simply being out the money--but even if you do I would wonder if it would be of sufficient quality.
 
Well in my opinion if you know them well enough and you know you can trust them....It a good thing!

But keep in mind lending money is pretty much like going to a store, sometimes you can get a full refund, and other times you can't get none.

It really depends if you are comfortable with it and can sit with it.
 
I have advanced money to 2 girls, each about $1000. One worked out well the other did not. Be very clear almost on paper how this will be repaid in trade. You look different to them after the advance money is put on drbt or something you seem to the SP to be a guy trying to get something for nothing. I spread the repayment over a long period so you always still bring a little. Example girl is $200/hr girl you advance $1000, repayment, I will see you 5 times but bring $100 each time, stay for two hours,maybe 2 shots. They still feel like they are not giving it free but you feel you are getting a fair deal as well.

Diamond said she had a guy give her $2500/month in advance but she gave him 10 hours /month so he was really getting a discount on her $300/h rate.
 
IMHO a very bad idea. It's never a good idea to lend money to anyone. Whether it be friends, family and especially sps:) .

If your regular sp is mad at you then simply move on to the next one. I don't mean too sound harsh but money changes people. IMHO just pay for services rendered each time and then leave it at that.
 
squash500 said:
IMHO just pay for services rendered each time and then leave it at that.
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I'm going to agree with Squash just to see what it feels like;) . I don't always drink beer but when I do I drink Coors Light.

On a related subject have any of you guys ever been short of cash at monthend and asked your SP to accept an IOU for full or partial payment?
 
Rockslinger said:
On a related subject have any of you guys ever been short of cash at monthend and asked your SP to accept an IOU for full or partial payment?
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No, and no, and if I ever were short I would never--if I WERE ever going to borrow money I would borrow it from my bank (e.g., by drawing on a line of credit). Even then, an SP is in the category of "luxury" expense and you should never, ever go into debt, of any kind, over a luxury expense. If you can't pay don't play.

Spending money on an SP, on a $200 dinner, on a $500 night out on the town, or whatever, comes AFTER all the following:

1. Mortgage/rent is paid
2. Food and other basic necessities have been bought
3. Utilities/insurance/car payments up to date
4. Income/property taxes paid up or set aside
5. Credit card paid up. Any other revolving debts paid off.
6. Appropriate emergency funds set aside
7. Appropriate retirement savings set aside

If you've paid up on all that then, and only then, should you start wondering what to do with what is LEFT OVER.
 
You could see an sp for 10 years and never really know her, her being short money means she has other problems, you're just an atm to her, as most of us are, I'd never do it but if you're comfy with it, that's all that matters.
 
As Judge Judy says, the best way to loose a friend is to loan money.

If your prepared to give it as if its a gift and not expect it back (or service) then go ahead. If your counting on it then its not wise to add bad feelings to the relationship. Her for not eventually not thinking you deserve the 'free' service or you for expecting the money back (or service) and maybe even expect better service.

GDL
 
Lisa of Toronto said:
this wasn't a friend, it was a client and sp, this was an advance in exchange of upcoming services, so esentially he got his moneys worth ;-)

i was recently in a situation where i was running out of town but was a couple hundred dollars short, i asked my neighbour/client and he came through for me...i really really appreciated that, you have no idea how much....a couple weeks later he collected and i returned the favour twice fold...so i suppose there is a benefit to the advancer
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I disagree this is not a friend in some small way. He is a regular and neighbour therefore there is some friendship. Not really important though.

I am glad to hear your a lady of your word and came through and your both happy. Its maybe not always the case with others though.
 
For the record the sessions went great as always. No problem contacting her, well no more than usual. All the previous posts' thoughts did enter my mind ,but after thinking about it a while I figured she had more to lose than I. Besides , I really like her . Repeat ... yes.
 
all depends on your relationship with her. If you have known her long and she knows that you represent a good stream of future income then the worse that can happen is that she skips on you for short term few dollars but the best that can happen is that she gives you better service and better rates for her time. I'd do it under the right condidtions after considering the variables.
 
Never lend money to a person who has drinking habbits, doing drugs, or a sex worker in adult indsutry, as these categories of people has no sense or responsibilities for financial management, & whatever they get in their hands goes off without any planning or is spent off in their bad habbits only, and just forget that you would get the same, some of them are really rip-off's
stay clear of such financial tranations, or you would loose their acquaintance even!
 
Mikehorn said:
Advances or borrowed money have never worked out well for me. Has she actually provided the sessions yet? Don't be surprised if you suddenly find her impossible to contact. She'll feel like why should she "work for free" for you now (for money she's already spent) when there are other guys waiting with money in hand.
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Good call Mikehorn, you hit the nail on the head. I had the misfortune of advancing an SP a decent amount of $$ just about a year ago, to pay an upcoming bill, and was promised 2 sessions as repayment. Admittedly she did pay the interest up front in the form of a BBBJ, but I haven’t seen the principal and probably never will, despite many requests via PM and email. You’d be surprised who the “lady” in question is, and I use the term “lady” VERY loosely. She’s been in the biz a number of years and by her own admission has made a fortune and has nothing to show for it. Interestingly enough, she recently had a few “touch ups” done to her body, and probably sucked in some poor sap to pay for that. :(
 
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