411 is usually about finding answers and info, in this instance, I'm going to relate something that has recently happened to a part-time provider in hopes that both providers and clients can offer some insight and strategies on how to deal with this. I know a provider who is dabbling part-time. She recently put up some ads and almost immediately was bombarded with, what can only be described as wretched texts. The long and short of it was this: either you give me the services I want or I'm going to TERB and other review sites and destroying your reputation. I have the screenshots she sent me. It's real. She was very upset over it and rightfully so. She has pulled her ads and is quite scared. She did NOTHING wrong. I consoled her saying that A, I had the proof, and B, if a review came up with this individual putting forth these bullshit claims I would confront him online in his post. What he's doing is extortion, full stop. So, TERBites, give me some ideas, strategies, plans, and options. This is the sort of thing that we, as a community, can crush if we work together. I'm no 'white knight', but I am a responsible member of this community and this sort of shit must not stand.
Providers being coerced.
- Thread starter Hughlongly
- Start date
This is just so upsetting to read. I know I speak not only for myself but many established ladies when I say my texts and DMs are open for any provider to reach out: 613-875-5878. And the OIC is open too. I feel very confident in saying there is help from other SWs if someone asks.
Many of us can help identify bad players, share effective strategies to protect yourself and build a network of badass women who will have your back.
IMHO this isn’t even optional in SW, we absolutely need some other providers to help guide us into this industry safely and then even more to last and thrive in it. I had literally no one, thinking it looked fun, maverick and just a perfect fit for my personality and stage in life. Of course it was great for a while, until some very bad things happened and forever altered my life as a result. Like all established ladies, I learned the need to do certain things the hard way.
Safety can start with just one note to a provider your lady feels safe reaching out to
Have enjoyed the companionship of Ruby Lust and your acquaintance is well taken care of with her words here or if she chooses to connect with her or any within the network. Tremendous to see Ruby chime in even while overlooking the MediterraneanThis is just so upsetting to read. I know I speak not only for myself but many established ladies when I say my texts and DMs are open for any provider to reach out: 613-875-5878. And the OIC is open too. I feel very confident in saying there is help from other SWs if someone asks.
Many of us can help identify bad players, share effective strategies to protect yourself and build a network of badass women who will have your back.
IMHO this isn’t even optional in SW, we absolutely need some other providers to help guide us into this industry safely and then even more to last and thrive in it. I had literally no one, thinking it looked fun, maverick and just a perfect fit for my personality and stage in life. Of course it was great for a while, until some very bad things happened and forever altered my life as a result. Like all established ladies, I learned the need to do certain things the hard way.
Safety can start with just one note to a provider your lady feels safe reaching out to
She must be new to the business. If I was her I would tell the Ahole who's texting to fuck right off and block him. Make a terb ID and post his texts if he contacts again.
Tell the Ahole that if he didn't stop I would report him to LE.
It's probably a bored dickhead who's trolling because he's got nothing better to do.
Post the A hole’s screenshots here with the phone number so that we can help identify and ban this idiot.
Thanks for sharing. If SPs are being extorted by TERB members we need to root out those members and expose them for the cowardly vermin they are.
This is about the credibility of the board and ourselves.
Preventative measure could be ...
1. Providers could become TERB members to report issues to the Mods and/or respond to negative reviews & put them in context.
2. Keep text and other communication as evidence. Forward to the Mods and/or to trusted TERB members
3. Trusted members could receive reports, share intel, report the vermin to the mods, call them out, and crush them in their subterranean lairs before their venomous posts see the light of day. Confine the demon-spawn to the black pits of Arallû where they'll burn in eternal hellfire
Have a nice day
This is about the credibility of the board and ourselves.
Preventative measure could be ...
1. Providers could become TERB members to report issues to the Mods and/or respond to negative reviews & put them in context.
2. Keep text and other communication as evidence. Forward to the Mods and/or to trusted TERB members
3. Trusted members could receive reports, share intel, report the vermin to the mods, call them out, and crush them in their subterranean lairs before their venomous posts see the light of day. Confine the demon-spawn to the black pits of Arallû where they'll burn in eternal hellfire
Have a nice day
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Honestly, hugs and I feel blessed to have some freedom to be more attentive.
Your thoughts for another lady’s sense of well-being are so kind and touching. Just as we’’re all probably disturbed by scammers who ruin things for our community, we’re upset by predators who make things unsafe. And anyone who knows me knows first and foremost, I don’t stand for bullying ever.
I mean this for all and any ladies who feel coerced. You find true allies in your regular gents and many ladies with diamond hearts to help if you ask. Bullies won't get far here!
Are there actual members that think they’ve that much influence? How narcissistic.
I’d hope any provider that encounters somebody bragging about their terb handle (and especially those that use it as a coercion tactic) to show them the door or charge them double.
I’d hope any provider that encounters somebody bragging about their terb handle (and especially those that use it as a coercion tactic) to show them the door or charge them double.
It does happen unfortunately.
When it happens to me, I respond with a promise to screenshot and expose if they follow through with their threats.
She is new and more vulnerable to these awful threats and extortion attempts. This is likely why she is being targeted so often.
I am not new and have the benefit of my long-term reputation.
This is a really awful thing to deal with.
I support my fellow SPs as long as they do no
harm to other sex workers.
I am always here to help and answer questions.
When it happens to me, I respond with a promise to screenshot and expose if they follow through with their threats.
She is new and more vulnerable to these awful threats and extortion attempts. This is likely why she is being targeted so often.
I am not new and have the benefit of my long-term reputation.
This is a really awful thing to deal with.
I support my fellow SPs as long as they do no
harm to other sex workers.
I am always here to help and answer questions.
Our board is here to help us all navigate this fun we all enjoy, When you get some really uncouth characters who use threats and demands it hurts all of us here. I would also recommend that the lady in question, become a member and share the screen shots, or reach out to the caring soles like @Theredmilf or @KittyCaterina for help and guidance. At the end of the day, know that we are here to help.
LTP
LTP
I've been told by a well established MA the same thing, that she has received multiple threats, from different numbers, asking for services and threatening bad reviews if not provided. i think we know some of the main culprits on here, as they do keep popping up under new names, but with extensive experience in the "hobby". unfortunately, with new providers who dont have the good reviews to offset the BS, its an uphill battle. How many times have we done our "research" on a provider here, spent 30 seconds and a negative review popps up, and then we move on to the next?
I'm not sure if its just guys wanting to get their way, or men trying to lure women into their "management".
I would think that having a TERB membership would be important for any new provider, not just to address issues with the community, but also to have access to the mods to monitor accurate content.
I would also have to say that in this world, there are a hell of alot more assholes than good guys, and your friend will likely run into a lot of these predators at the beginning when she is looking to establish herself.
suck it up, dont give in, play within your boundries, nobody elses, and build the reputation slowly if this is what you want to do.
I'm not sure if its just guys wanting to get their way, or men trying to lure women into their "management".
I would think that having a TERB membership would be important for any new provider, not just to address issues with the community, but also to have access to the mods to monitor accurate content.
I would also have to say that in this world, there are a hell of alot more assholes than good guys, and your friend will likely run into a lot of these predators at the beginning when she is looking to establish herself.
suck it up, dont give in, play within your boundries, nobody elses, and build the reputation slowly if this is what you want to do.
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This is horrible that some loser guy doesn't have anything better to do than to be bothering and trying to mentally mess with the young lady. I hope he disappear because it's not the least appropriate for you anymore doing this.
But I've been told by some very nice Sp that a lot of times their fake out calls and appointments are a lot of times being done by other less attractive jealous females SP so unfortunately this could also be another female Sp doing this BS aswell SMH
But I've been told by some very nice Sp that a lot of times their fake out calls and appointments are a lot of times being done by other less attractive jealous females SP so unfortunately this could also be another female Sp doing this BS aswell SMH
Communicating with a SP for services is a criminal offence, attempting to extort an SP for services is a criminal offence and if the victim complied the sex would not be consentual becausd it was coerced and thus sexual assault. Repeated communication with a SP after they said stop is harassment and a criminal offence. So outlining these thing to the offending party and advising that you have screen captured everything for the police to track them down if they persist is usually makes most losers think twice. Certainly there will be some hard headed idiots who actually need more than a warning but they tend to be very rear. Good record keeping on the creeps is always a good idea. These are the losers that ruin a good time for us all.
Definitely unacceptable and men doing this should be exposed and banned
This very much makes me upset and sad. Misogyny really isn’t right nor appropriate here. As Ruby suggested, there are resources, colleagues, trusted clients out there that can be utilized. Anything that makes things safer for both the good providers - - and the good clients.
Let's face it, there are always going to be legit bad experiences and we’ve the ability to speak of them here. There also isn’t anyone here who isn’t using a pseudonym to be anonymous. That’s one legitimate side of the coin, but we as the client community can also support in ensuring that the board itself is increasing free of misleading or slanderous posts by turning to the reputable amongst this group, safely listening to the challenges raised by providers when they are brought up and encouraging things such as bad client and phone number listings.
I truly hope that this lady sees resolution to this issue. It’s unfair and inappropriate.
Let's face it, there are always going to be legit bad experiences and we’ve the ability to speak of them here. There also isn’t anyone here who isn’t using a pseudonym to be anonymous. That’s one legitimate side of the coin, but we as the client community can also support in ensuring that the board itself is increasing free of misleading or slanderous posts by turning to the reputable amongst this group, safely listening to the challenges raised by providers when they are brought up and encouraging things such as bad client and phone number listings.
I truly hope that this lady sees resolution to this issue. It’s unfair and inappropriate.
post the proof of those messages.
it would be quite a bold and idiotic move to be a member here, and to threaten a bad review.
if that fictitious person were to follow through on the threat, they would be revealing themselves.
that would then lead back to them - and consequences would follow.
those threats could have come from another jealous provider, a pimp, or justin trudeau.
post the proof.
it would be quite a bold and idiotic move to be a member here, and to threaten a bad review.
if that fictitious person were to follow through on the threat, they would be revealing themselves.
that would then lead back to them - and consequences would follow.
those threats could have come from another jealous provider, a pimp, or justin trudeau.
post the proof.
If I was a provider, I couldn't care less about reviews. I mean if review boards were that influential then there wouldn't be so many scammers posting Ads on LL and duping clients. Fact is not many clients even know about review boards. So I wouldn't worry about fake reviews. Eventually the truth comes out.
Not condoning the A-holes behaviour but new providers need to grow a thick skin and connect with other providers to learn about safety measures. If a stupid texts scared and upset the lady then she needs to become more stronger before accepting new clients. Maybe work at a Spa until she gets the hang of things or have a better verification system for new clients.
She could run into unsavoury, rough or drunk clients and should be prepared to deal with that situation. This unfortunately is the nature of this business.
Not condoning the A-holes behaviour but new providers need to grow a thick skin and connect with other providers to learn about safety measures. If a stupid texts scared and upset the lady then she needs to become more stronger before accepting new clients. Maybe work at a Spa until she gets the hang of things or have a better verification system for new clients.
She could run into unsavoury, rough or drunk clients and should be prepared to deal with that situation. This unfortunately is the nature of this business.
A few thoughts and not meant to call anyone out but just inform thinking.
It doesn’t cost anything to be empathetic and helpful towards someone who is isolated, inexperienced and feels overwhelmed. It’s normal not to know how to deal with predatory behaviour. Confidence in this industry takes time and often community supports.
Saying a provider just needs to develop a thick skin and deal with it or is perhaps making up stories starts to sound a bit victim-blamey and the same lens could be applied when someone is a victim of theft. The reality is we need to be careful but should help each other because there will always be trickers better at their games than we are at avoiding them. And if someone is being coerced, it’s not their fault. I believe it because it passes the sniff-test for me. Most SWs have experienced coercion if not outright assault, so I don’t have a problem accepting this as the truth.
I think we need to be careful in saying this industry is inherently dangerous and coercive. For one, this is the exactly the argument used to justify criminalizing clients and I don’t think anyone wants to go there. SWs are trying to argue it’s the larger legal and social context that makes SW especially dangerous and subject to coercion, not the inherent nature or the work nor clients. And in doing so we’re pushing for solutions that will make it safe. Which is what we should be talking about here IMHO.
Hopefully more will get the message from this thread that no one needs to feel isolated and overwhelmed without supports.
It doesn’t cost anything to be empathetic and helpful towards someone who is isolated, inexperienced and feels overwhelmed. It’s normal not to know how to deal with predatory behaviour. Confidence in this industry takes time and often community supports.
Saying a provider just needs to develop a thick skin and deal with it or is perhaps making up stories starts to sound a bit victim-blamey and the same lens could be applied when someone is a victim of theft. The reality is we need to be careful but should help each other because there will always be trickers better at their games than we are at avoiding them. And if someone is being coerced, it’s not their fault. I believe it because it passes the sniff-test for me. Most SWs have experienced coercion if not outright assault, so I don’t have a problem accepting this as the truth.
I think we need to be careful in saying this industry is inherently dangerous and coercive. For one, this is the exactly the argument used to justify criminalizing clients and I don’t think anyone wants to go there. SWs are trying to argue it’s the larger legal and social context that makes SW especially dangerous and subject to coercion, not the inherent nature or the work nor clients. And in doing so we’re pushing for solutions that will make it safe. Which is what we should be talking about here IMHO.
Hopefully more will get the message from this thread that no one needs to feel isolated and overwhelmed without supports.
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Ignore. Hobbyists will do the rest to weed out the trashy, stupid, false, fake reviews and will often post supporting the SP. A new member posting a horrifically bad demeaning review? Not to be trusted. Remember "New Member" can be changed/edited. How many posts? specifically ones reviewing other SPs? Seriously dude, you're new, what have you got to compare to? After a bad date, experienced hobbyists will often review in a negative yet respectful manner. "May have been an off day for her" or "No chemistry" or "NMCOT". Those with an ulterior motive often post an extreme long biblical epic laundry list of dissatisfactions.
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