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How?

danmand

Well-known member
Nov 28, 2003
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How did Jesus find guys named Peter, John, James, Matthew, Andrew, Phillip, Thomas & Simon in the Middle East?!
 

Valcazar

Just a bundle of fucking sunshine
Mar 27, 2014
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What I want to know is.. if first there was Adam and Eve, who had two sons... Now what????
I think the classical answer there is that the Bible doesn't specify that those were the only two children Adam and Eve had at that point.

Just that Cain was born before Abel. (Maybe there is something specific about Cain being the first child, I can't remember.)

So Cain is born. A bunch of other kids are born. At some point Abel is born. Cain kills Abel. Seth is born specifically to replace Cain.
The kids fuck each other and there you go - humans.
 

jazzbox

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Jan 29, 2009
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I think the classical answer there is that the Bible doesn't specify that those were the only two children Adam and Eve had at that point.

Just that Cain was born before Abel. (Maybe there is something specific about Cain being the first child, I can't remember.)

So Cain is born. A bunch of other kids are born. At some point Abel is born. Cain kills Abel. Seth is born specifically to replace Cain.
The kids fuck each other and there you go - humans.
This explains a lot.
 

jeff2

Well-known member
Sep 11, 2004
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Another thing is with old footage. I can't find people picking their noses.
 

thumper18474

Well-known member
How did Jesus find guys named Peter, John, James, Matthew, Andrew, Phillip, Thomas & Simon in the Middle East?!
He just thought of his favorite musicians
Peter Frampton
John Lennon
James Taylor
Mathew Good Band
Andrew Gibb
Phillip Collins
Thomas Lee
Paul Simon....DUH
 

Patron

Well-known member
Jan 5, 2014
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How did Jesus find guys named Peter, John, James, Matthew, Andrew, Phillip, Thomas & Simon in the Middle East?!
The better question is how Jesus stumbled upon so many guys with those type of names who wanted to be part of a gang led by someone with a Puerto Rican first name?
 
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xix

Time Zone Traveller
Jul 27, 2002
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La la land
I read somewhere that Adam and Eve is not their proper name. A& E are words from old Hindu language that mean Men and Women.
So it doesn't say if it is a single Adam/man or could be MEN. Many men with each men paired up with a wild women.
The snake could be their Ego. How could you describe psychology to someone in 1350 Europe?

The book has changed or being altered many times. So,,,, to each their own.
 

Valcazar

Just a bundle of fucking sunshine
Mar 27, 2014
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I read somewhere that Adam and Eve is not their proper name. A& E are words from old Hindu language that mean Men and Women.
Not Hindu, Hebrew.
But yes, in Genesis 1, Adam reads as plural and means many people/humanity.
In Genesis 2, it's a different story, involving a single couple one created after the other.
 

y2kmark

Class of 69...
May 19, 2002
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Lewiston, NY
How did Jesus find guys named Peter, John, James, Matthew, Andrew, Phillip, Thomas & Simon in the Middle East?!
what were those names in Aramaic before they were translated to Greek-Latin-English, sometimes with a stop at German? Biblical scholars now contend that none of the four New Testament writers (Matt., Mark, Luke & John) actually met Jesus. He wasn't on FB either...
 
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danmand

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Nov 28, 2003
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what were those names in Aramaic before they were translated to Greek-Latin-English, sometimes with a stop at German? Biblical scholars now contend that none of the four New Testament writers (Matt., Mark, Luke & John) actually met Jesus. He wasn't on FB either...
They would have been banned on FB. Maybe they should try X
 

K Douglas

Half Man Half Amazing
Jan 5, 2005
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Room 112
Maybe read the Bible to find out how. It will probably do you some good.
 
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danmand

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Nov 28, 2003
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Maybe read the Bible to find out how. It will probably do you some good.
No need. I received my education in a country without separation between state and church. I had bible study in school.

I do not know how much good it did me.
 
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D'arcy

Supporting Member
Sep 21, 2016
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How did Jesus find guys named Peter, John, James, Matthew, Andrew, Phillip, Thomas & Simon in the Middle East?!
I'm fucking dead... Omg! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Almost as crazy as Jesus being white.
Almost as crazy as his mom being a virgin even tho she was travelling with Joseph... Like we're supposed to believe he was just in The Friend Zone!
 

D'arcy

Supporting Member
Sep 21, 2016
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Toronto
What I want to know is.. if first there was Adam and Eve, who had two sons... Now what????
Well since there were clearly no other women it looks like Abel and Cane were likely Mother Fuckers... Literally 🤣
 
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