What does “cheating” mean to you?

[poker]

A couple years ago I met a girl on a dating app. We got together for about 7 or 8 months. Different cities, about 40 min drive away. Schedules allowed us to get together alternate weekends, and alternate Thursdays.

One particular Thursday I arrive at her place… and it’s clear she was not expecting me. She was trying to hide the panic mode. Would not look at me… and literally left the house to go text on the driveway where I could not see. (I actually seen her reflection on an open window, as she furiously texted for about 5 or 6 minutes outside).

I called her on it… as it was fucking obvious. She then started the with a story about a house is for sale on her street, and she just texted her friend a picture of it. That’s why she went outside. Game on!

Her phone was on her table upside down and she would not pick it up when the notifications went off… then after 3 or 4 minutes, she sort of lazily picks it up to go in the kitchen to get a drink. (Txt txt txt).

It’s clear she had another guy coming over… and had to balance me being there, and giving him excuses that wasn’t “my boyfriends here”. And he was ready to go, so he was texting her all night.

I ended that pretty quick. (Although I stuck around that night, for the show. It really did amuse me, as in the past, I had been the shithead trying to hide my phone. Watching someone else play the same games I used to play… was educational).

She insists she never cheated as she only hooked up with the guy after we broke up. I say when you are making plans behind you significant others back, that’s cheating, even if the plan is to break up last minute.

What are your rules about it?

 

[Robert Mugabe]

Cheating means never having to say you're sorry.

Oh, no, that's love. scratch that.

 

[onomatopoeia]

Dude, you had a fuck buddy who wasn't seeing you exclusively. Cheating only applies to a spouse, fiancée, or long term exclusive girlfriend. Did you REALLY expect a monogamous relationship with someone you met on a dating app???

 

[Robert Mugabe]

Maybe she forgot her key

 

[poker]

Dude, you had a fuck buddy who wasn't seeing you exclusively. Cheating only applies to a spouse, fiancée, or long term exclusive girlfriend. Did you REALLY expect a monogamous relationship with someone you met on a dating app???

She wouldn’t let me fuck anyone else…. And I was introduced to all her friends…. But you’re not wrong. Either way, she never really stopped playing on the apps and lied. Is that dirty pool or not.

 

[SuddenAwakening]

If we've understood that we are "exclusive" meaning not seeing other folks in terms of dating and sex then cheating would imply breaking that commitment. Cheating doesn't have to be physical as it can also be emotional. They could be flirting with someone else and having an emotional affair rather than a physical one.

 

[onomatopoeia]

She wouldn’t let me fuck anyone else…. And I was introduced to all her friends…. But you’re not wrong. Either way, she never really stopped playing on the apps and lied. Is that dirty pool or not.

You mean that you allowed her to do that. Next time, wear the pants.

 

[angrymime666]

if you are not willing to do the behavior in front of your partner with them watching and listening its cheating.

this includes flirting.

 

[xix]

A couple years ago I met a girl on a dating app. We got together for about 7 or 8 months. Different cities, about 40 min drive away. Schedules allowed us to get together alternate weekends, and alternate Thursdays.

First you don't mention if she has any kids which is important to me. There is a reason I will not go into it.

Second mistake, I learned from other peoples experiences, when a person comes from another city to see you, this is called a "RED FLAG", why?
Because the choices of her pool / her local city/ for dating has diminished. She had dated all the men she liked in her area or the style she preferred. SO if there were 100 men and she dated 20, she can't date anymore or the other 80, because they are not her type by looks or what ever reason, even if they made the money. SO she went outside her zone for another pool and you got tagged.

I have seen videos on youtube where these men looked the same and were tagged by the same woman and she sent them the same video of herself. Somehow these guys figured it out and found themselves. These guys had this weird beard style. DATING APPS know this but they never release this info, if they did it would break the fabric of dating their pockets.

Third your schedule is not unique I heard the same story, alternate weekends. Because of her kids/or other boyfriend. One woman had the kids every other week. Hence why she may have seen you every other week.

One particular Thursday I arrive at her place… and it’s clear she was not expecting me. She was trying to hide the panic mode. Would not look at me… and literally left the house to go text on the driveway where I could not see. (I actually seen her reflection on an open window, as she furiously texted for about 5 or 6 minutes outside).

It’s clear she had another guy coming over… and had to balance me being there, and giving him excuses that wasn’t “my boyfriends here”. And he was ready to go, so he was texting her all night.

She played you, karma is a bitch, and the other guy also figured her out and he was trying to play her that night so you would know what is going on. He chose the high road not to come because he would do her that weekend and leave her after some fun. He's been down this road before.

I ended that pretty quick. (Although I stuck around that night, for the show. It really did amuse me, as in the past, I had been the shithead trying to hide my phone. Watching someone else play the same games I used to play… was educational).

Nice.

She insists she never cheated as she only hooked up with the guy after we broke up. I say when you are making plans behind you significant others back, that’s cheating, even if the plan is to break up last minute.

What are your rules about it?

A narcissist would say this, check out vids at YT about narcissist and relationships. She doesn't want to get married or LTR, this EVENT is only for one year - I have seen this. Then after a year it's your time or clue that you must break it up, Narc always want you to break it up. Hence why she already had another guy or monkey branching. If it was FWB circumstances then you were her psychological post for her a shoulder to cry on or unleash her feelings on you then you get sugar. I have seen this with divorcees.

Oh well move on.

 

[xix]

She wouldn’t let me fuck anyone else…. And I was introduced to all her friends…. But you’re not wrong. Either way, she never really stopped playing on the apps and lied. Is that dirty pool or not.

Red - she didn't want someone else to have you, seen this before selfish.

Blue - this is new, Could this be a GAME she and her friends are playing with men?? Go visit her friends unexpectedly if they are single, flirt and see if you can extract any info from them. Was it a game they or she is playing or is she a mental case? OR is she showing off?

Orange - welcome to the new addiction - after beer and smokes- I seen and heard this from my coworker. After sex with his current girlfriend, in front of her before she fell asleep he starts looking at his dating apps - she saw this and told him - Aren't we exclusive? oh yeah. People are clowns NOW.

What is the age of this ex chick of yours?

 

[karzon]

You mean that you allowed her to do that. Next time, wear the pants.

Man - takes of his pants and gives them to his GF - put these on
GF - I can't they are toooooo Big
Man - Thats right and you Never will has long as I am your BF
GF - Slips out of panties and says here put these on
Man - I can't get into these they are tooo small
GF - and you not going to until you change your attitude lol

 

[The Oracle]

if you are not willing to do the behavior in front of your partner with them watching and listening its cheating.

this includes flirting.

Simple and to the point and oh so correct.

 

[poker]

Red - she didn't want someone else to have you, seen this before selfish.

Blue - this is new, Could this be a GAME she and her friends are playing with men?? Go visit her friends unexpectedly if they are single, flirt and see if you can extract any info from them. Was it a game they or she is playing or is she a mental case? OR is she showing off?

Orange - welcome to the new addiction - after beer and smokes- I seen and heard this from my coworker. After sex with his current girlfriend, in front of her before she fell asleep he starts looking at his dating apps - she saw this and told him - Aren't we exclusive? oh yeah. People are clowns NOW.

What is the age of this ex chick of yours?

It was in 2016…. I think she was 40-ish.

I am bored today, talking to one old gf online, and went down memory lane about some others. That one always pissed me off. At one point I though it was going somewhere… then she showed her hand.

And good call on what the other guy may have been doing by texting all night. I had not thought of that myself. I just figured he was hot for her and messaged her all night in lieu of being able to come over.

 

[jalimon]

I always wanted my gf to cheat on me… as long as i was there too

I have always separated sex from love.

It came in university as i was having sex pretty much every week with an out of town girl that would return to her bf every weekend… And which she married and had kids.

She just wanted to live her life before it was loo late. Later found out she also fucked with quite a few buddy of mine when a friend of mine appeared at het apartment as i was leaving

The concept of cheating as never existed for me. A girl is not my property. Might as well be consensual and have fun

 

[Goodoer]

She wouldn’t let me fuck anyone else…. And I was introduced to all her friends….

One of the first love lessons I ever received…. She wouldn’t let me move on until she fucked another dude and told me about it. I felt like such a loser for trying to be kind…. I ditched her and all of my friends at the time and never looked back.

 

[Goodoer]

I do think that sex and love can be separate. I don’t think Swingers cheat, but I do wonder about Open Relationships where things are done apart from one another…. Together is together.

 

[poker]

I do think that sex and love can be separate. I don’t think Swingers cheat, but I do wonder about Open Relationships where things are done apart from one another…. Together is together.

Some couples are better at it than others…. It’s when the lies start.

 

[xix]

Relationships are not what it used be like the 1800's. The new relationship - It's not really new its been around the beginning of time - it just evolved much bigger than what it used to be in the 1800's, I call the new relationship 3C's.

Cheating and commitment has a different name now but its still the same. If you are seeking a marriage till death then do the following. As a human being you have to learn how to detect what type of person is sitting across from you within the 6 dates. Know how to smoothly ask " what are your goals in 10 or 20 years? or where do you see yourself?." If the response is not about relationship - for example I want to be with someone I love and has good values- then Run For The Mountains. Be able to read them if they are honest, test them by making them pay their own share on the date. IF you see attitude then RFTM. There are other test you can try.

Below is a bell curve. One of the best things I was taught in college, I always use it to apply to people psychology plus more. I won't bother explaining it but I learned something new over the weekend from my neighbour lady who is 80. People who are over 40 years old whether single parent, divorce parent don't want to get married, They are in the C to F of the curve. If you find one in the G & H and low income they will commit to marriage or live together till death.


Most people just get involved for FWB and PP - psychological post. This can last from a month to 10 years, they are in the A - D section.

What makes me laugh is that people will change clothes, furniture and cars easily and let go of them but when it come to relationships it's hard to let go. Heck I even think of one from ages ago once in a while.
Remember the following “She’s not yours, it’s just your turn”.

I been told Dating Apps it's just a new form of sex pleasure convenience and temporary Band aid healing. If you meet anyone that gets married from an app they are at the end of H section of the curve. Exception to the rule.

Here is a quote I like from Reddit..

Women nowadays have more power, more education, more opportunities and society makes them out to be super heroes. I'm not saying that women having these freedoms is a bad thing. But it's definitely causing a big rift in the dating scene.

 

[Fred Flinstone]

If you have to ask what's considered cheating, it is..

 

[Sonic Temple]

My 2 pennies is this - cheating is what you make of it - I have mates who love their significant others but still fck around and don't consider it 'cheating' because they actually love their significant others, they just can't get what they can get outside at home. Karma - and all that shit is useless to me as someone in the past made that word up and define it as that and we now have that as a term - you control your own destiny - be careful out there. Not much - but what did you expect for 2 pennies