What I didn't understand many years ago was that if my wife doesn't want sex it's usually because of something I am doing. Aka my behavior or my physical state or I'm smelly or scruffy.
I found an mazing book a few years ago called "The Married Man's Sex Guide"
By Athol Kay. The book changed my life. When you act all weak and start begging for sex or moping about it, it's a huge turnoff for your woman. If your laying around the house like a bum, that's a turn off. If your complacent in your job or out of shape physically or a beta among the people around you, then you're turning off your woman hugely. Get your shit together. Get in shape ! Help out around the house ! Do your own laundry ! No bigger turnoff then your wife seeing your racing stripes ! Oh and btw, if your wearing tighty whities or old oversized clothes or dirty and dorky shoes, you're a huge turn off. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, then you're a huge turn off to your woman.