Do You Think People Should Be Required To take Parenting Lessons before having Children?

[Claudia Love]

So throughout my life I've met thousands of people that opened up to me and one thing was in common with most they were abused as a child either sexually, or emotionally.Their parents didn't know how to deal with stress and therefor took it out on the children. Then as those people got married and had children they became abusive to their children and the cycle continued from learnt behaviour. Even though they'd say I'd never be like my parents or aunts or uncles or grandparents etc..Theres millions of broken people on this planet and being a therapist seems to be a never ending job trying to fix people. So I ask you this .......Do you think people should have to take a mandatory parenting course before having children so lives are enriched with positive role models?

 

[Sonic Temple]

This is a great thread @Courtney O Cumming, I see and hear from my friends that there is no such thing, but if it is available they all say the same thing - they would've signed up because the more knowledge you have the better as there is no manual for parenting but helping each other. Anything that helps to enrich or break the cycle is good enough for me.

 

[Akila Besos]

When I was pregnant with my child I was attending a weekly parent/mommy class. It was nice but also just repeated alot of things I already knew from helping my relatives take care of the younger children in the family.

It can be a good tool when you really don't know what is going on

But also parenting is about learning on the job and no amount of class will fully prepare you for what is at hand

 

[Darts]

Is there a test at the end of the course? So, what happens to people who fail the test?

 

[Indiana]

Intelligence tests

 

[VIPhunter]

People who sexually abuse, physically abuse, or emotionally abuse their children are stunted human beings and I can't see how mandatory parenting classes will change anything in this situation.

Parenting classes may be a wise idea to assist healthy parents-to-be by teaching
the nitty gritty of child-rearing, balancing a household budget, and keeping the parental relationship together... (and much it will go out the window as your kids grow, because really now, NOBODY is an expert in this field.)

 

[Male4Strapon]

So throughout my life I've met thousands of people that opened up to me and one thing was in common with most they were abused as a child either sexually, or emotionally.Their parents didn't know how to deal with stress and therefor took it out on the children. Then as those people got married and had children they became abusive to their children and the cycle continued from learnt behaviour. Even though they'd say I'd never be like my parents or aunts or uncles or grandparents etc..Theres millions of broken people on this planet and being a therapist seems to be a never ending job trying to fix people. So I ask you this .......Do you think people should have to take a mandatory parenting course before having children so lives are enriched with positive role models?

In theory that's a great idea but I have to ask....... or what? Will they go to jail for not attending? Have their unborn child taken away from them? What if they attend but don't absorb anything from it either intentionally or just because they're not good students?
Good people who have children will make a conscientious effort to be good parents but can never be perfect. Assholes are going to be assholes towards their kids even with a mandatory parenting course. Sadly I don't believe your idea would accomplish anything.

 

[Darts]

Intelligence tests

This sounds too much like streaming. It means only people with a certain level of intelligence are qualified to breed. The lefties will fight this tooth and nail.

Edit: I can see issues already. It will most likely mean that only intelligent, matured people who can afford kids will be qualified to have kids.

There was a homeless encampment in a park not far from where I live. (Maybe one near you as well.) Anyway, I saw a few little kids and one very visibly pregnant woman (no, it wasn't Lyndsay Morrison) and I wondered what kind of life/future these kids will have (yes, terrible of me to think that).

 

[Claudia Love]

In theory that's a great idea but I have to ask....... or what? Will they go to jail for not attending? Have their unborn child taken away from them? What if they attend but don't absorb anything from it either intentionally or just because they're not good students?
Good people who have children will make a conscientious effort to be good parents but can never be perfect. Assholes are going to be assholes towards their kids even with a mandatory parenting course. Sadly I don't believe your idea would accomplish anything.

In 2018 in Canada these are the numbers of being REPORTED many are NOT reported til they feel safe to do so 18,965 child and youth are victimized by a family member, a parent (59%) was the most common perpetrator, followed by another type of family member—such as a grandparent, uncle or aunt—or a sibling (24% and 16%, respectively).the numbers kept increasing throughout the yearsso its safe to say with the pandemic 2020 was worse.
Most parents are just winging it hoping for the best outcome and some parents are raging lunatics that don;t give a shit how they behave towards their child.Its about educating adults to raise healthier children they don't need to be smart in school they could do the course orally and if they cant understand that you dont sexually abuse or beat your kids they would have to do the course again before they ruin another life.Its about prevention of abuse.

 

[Male4Strapon]

In 2018 in Canada these are the numbers of being REPORTED many are NOT reported til they feel safe to do so 18,965 child and youth are victimized by a family member, a parent (59%) was the most common perpetrator, followed by another type of family member—such as a grandparent, uncle or aunt—or a sibling (24% and 16%, respectively).the numbers kept increasing throughout the yearsso its safe to say with the pandemic 2020 was worse.
Most parents are just winging it hoping for the best outcome and some parents are raging lunatics that don;t give a shit how they behave towards their child.Its about educating adults to raise healthier children they don't need to be smart in school they could do the course orally and if they cant understand that you dont sexually abuse or beat your kids they would have to do the course again before they ruin another life.Its about prevention of abuse.

I am 100% in agreement, I just don't believe any kind of mandatory classes would accomplish much and I don't know how it could be enforced.
As for doing the course again if you don't understand that you're not supposed to abuse your kids, even the worst abusers would tell an official that it's bad and you shouldn't do that. Most would believe that too.
The problem is when that same dad comes home from a shitty day and takes it out on his kid or a guy who molests his daughter only when he's drunk...... no mandatory classroom setting is going to stop that.
These people are obviously very disturbed and need therapy (and imprisonment and a beat-down too).

 

[angrymime666]

I dont think most people know what good parenting is, nor can be responsible enough both financially and mentally to actually raise children.

 

[HeavyNaturals]

Every single women can have a child but very very few are mothers !

 

[xix]

The test would be to inform , enrich, encourage future parents what's to come. The ups and downs. A co-worker told me he went once to daddy/mommy pregnant class which only run for 8 weeks. He learn how to be in the moment to bring down his stress level in one class that he only attended.

A parenting program should be created like a 12 step AA meeting. A place for people to remind themselves what parenting is, come when you can. Should have 12 topics /steps for people to reinforce their parenting goals.

There is a future mon at my 2nd home (work). The junk food and anger she goes through makes me avoid marriage/children altogether.

 

[oil&gas]

IMO prospective parents should be taught overpopulation
is more threatening to the planet than climate change before they
decide if they want to add another child to world's population.

 

[Spunky1]

I took my dog to puppy classes and then obedience training . I'll just use the same training workbook for parenting stuff.

 

[explorerzip]

I think Home Economics aka Family Studies and Shop were mandatory around grade 7 or 8. Not sure if that's still the case. They'd teach really basic cooking skills, some sewing skills, I think. I do remember baking scones in Home Ec and my mom said they tasted pretty good. I didn't send her running to the bathroom so that was a good sign.

I seem to remember my brother bringing home an electronic baby doll in the early 90's I think while he was in grade 8 or 9. The baby would randomly "cry" throughout the day and night. He had to press a key fob or something to the chest to simulate that he was feeding, changing diapers, etc. Now I know why he doesn't want kids I think it was a great idea at the time because it showed the very basic realities of living with a baby.

I think the key lesson from the OP's post is that we need to prepare people on how to deal with stress from an early age. Stress is going to be a constant through our whole life so we might as well try to teach people how to cope with it and how to see it it other people. Maybe it's teaching meditation, how to stay organized, how to help other people deal with stress..

 

[xix]

I took my dog to puppy classes and then obedience training . I'll just use the same training workbook for parenting stuff.

I know your been sarcastic, But your statement is very true, as I have witness from people's mouth that they rather treat their pets better than their kids.

 

[Jenesis]

Wannabes parents should have to look after a toddler for a week, an 8-10year for a week and then a teenage for a week.

But then we want to have a growing population and half would say fuck it after the toddler sitting. And any left will be saying no after a teenage for a week.

Seriously though, parenting classes focus on babies, and that is the problem. They grow up. They talk back, they have their own minds, their own thoughts and feelings and you can’t control them.

That is what abuse ends up being. A form of power and control. Parents think that because they say so, the kid is suppose to listen. That is just not what happens.

 

[explorerzip]

Parents think that because they say so, the kid is suppose to listen. That is just not what happens.

As with anything else, it depends. There are certain situations i.e. safety where kids must listen and follow instructions of their parents or teachers whether they like it or not. The same thing goes with the relationship between employers and employees. There are certain things that an employee must do because it's a condition of employment or it's safety related. You've had personal experience with this. You did a great job in trying to accommodate your employee, but he had to do whatever it took to correct his performance issues. If he did not correct his issues then he deserves to be fired no matter what was going on in his life. As much as we'd like to have a collaborative workplace where workers are free to share ideas, you cannot action all of them.

I think parents today have stressed themselves out by trying to keep up with the Joneses." They feel that their kids are going to screwed over if they don't have the newest toys, laptops, phone and data plan every year. Or if they don't attend hockey, baseball, band practice, etc. We didn't get shit as kids unless we produced a good report card or got ourselves a job and bought stuff on our own. You're right that child abuse is a big problem, but not enough structure or discipline in kid's life is also a big problem.

 

[explorerzip]

IMO prospective parents should be taught overpopulation
is more threatening to the planet than climate change before they
decide if they want to add another child to world's population.

I think overpopulation is not as big of a problem as some make it out to be. For one, people are marrying much later or choosing not to have kids at all. Those that do have kids don't have as many. That's part of the reason that the population of China has been declining for decades.

That being said, the Western way of life is very wasteful especially since it's now gone global. We have major issues to address like water, energy and food production, housing and waste disposal.