Bit ackward/what would you do?

SlitherySOB

M/L/C
Jul 2, 2004
460
0
0
Durham
I went to a restaurant with a friend and saw a waitress that looked familiar. She was an SP I was with awhile ago. Now, this was ackward because she recognised me as well. If she didn't, I would have acted as if she was any other waitress. Not to be rude, but to be discreet for both our sakes. I don't want people knowing about this hobby, and I doubt she didn't want people knowing she was, or still is, an escort. Basically, we said a few ackward words to each other, and then nothing else throughout the dinner except for ordering and getting the bill. Very ackward silence. The person I was with new something was wrong. I told her I recognised the waitress from a party. That was it. She let her imagination do the rest. But, in case it happens again, what do you do when you run into a service provider in a situation like above? Or any situation, for that matter?
 

happygrump

Once more into the breach
May 21, 2004
820
0
0
Waterloo Region
When you allow your date/wife/SO or whatever to fill in the details with their imagination in this sort of situation, it will ALWAYS, WITHOUT EXCEPTION be to your detriment.

So ask yourself this: If your date/whatever was in the same position and was obviously keeping something from you, would you know? What would you think? What would it do to the relationship (assuming there is one)?

What to do? You probably did as best as you could have done under the circumstances. Nonchalance is a very, very difficult thing to fake. If your SO questions you further (and undoubtedly she will), you'll have to stick to your story. She may also ask for details: Whose party? When was it? What was her name? etc etc. If you're going to start manufacturing history, be absolutely sure that your memory is 100% because it may come back to haunt you. (Women are fantastic at remembering this stuff. They can pick the teeniest thing out of a lie and use it to unravel the entire sordid episode.)

Good luck!
 

SlitherySOB

M/L/C
Jul 2, 2004
460
0
0
Durham
She wasn't my date. Just a friend. And I know some people say that a man and woman can't just be friends. But considering all the female friends I have, I must disagree. Basically, she took me out to dinner to celebrate my birthday, and I recognized the waitress.
 

happygrump

Once more into the breach
May 21, 2004
820
0
0
Waterloo Region
Yes, a man and woman can be friends. I've got a boatload of female friends, which I happen to like very much... they're smart, they keep me on my toes... and they tend to smell better than my men friends.

What if you told your friend the truth? What's the upside and downside?
 

SlitherySOB

M/L/C
Jul 2, 2004
460
0
0
Durham
The upside is she'd laugh at it. The downside is she'd know the waitress is an escort.
 

selection

New member
Jul 5, 2004
182
0
0
ottawa
old friend

I just say it's an old friend since I travel a lot and meet many people. I am very open so I tend to tanlk to a lot of people. if you try to hide something then you will get in trouble since people will read your expressiona dn think why is he so uncomfortable. Then you might say also its a friend of a friend. Just make sure your story is legit

good luck next time
 

slyjohn

Luv to lick & lick to luv
Jan 28, 2002
500
0
0
Ottawa East
Being ackward is the last thing you want. Women pick this up quickly... especialy wives! ;)

I tend to flirt alot when I go out with my wife..and not with her all the time... so if I do end up face to face with a lovely ex-Sp, I would act normal and be nice. Pretend you might know her from a coffee shop near your work... of a work partner... whatever..

When you meet an SP, be nice and truthfull... at a very high percentage, they will know that you have a Gf/wife and cut down on the chit chat when you are with them.

Unless your wife was involved with this SP... heh heh!

Sly
 

Bearlythere

Lost IN the Shwa
Aug 20, 2001
1,088
58
48
Oshawa
I would pretend like nothing happened. Lets face it, if you are there with a woman, and it isn't a wife, if you look at the waitress, and she and you sort of act awkward, you could say it was someone you met at a party years ago and sort of got frisky with. No one has to know money was involved.
 

fmahovalich

Active member
Aug 21, 2009
7,256
17
38
Men can be friends with ladies...But we all have conditions.

They have to NOT be dogs.... They have to be presentable..dress well..smell good.

Now the uglier WE ARE..the lower the expectations are on the ladies looks.!

BUT MOST OF ALL...as Nice as they are...

They are NOT ladies that we want to bed..for whatever reason.

Men can only be friends with ladies that they would never have sexual relations with.

If you want em in bed....then the friendship will end before you get em in the sack!!!
 

fmahovalich

Active member
Aug 21, 2009
7,256
17
38
My point Brookly exactly...you have friends....and they are sweet enough to have sex with!!

Do you have girlfriends that you see....say at least ONCE A MONTH...who are just friends
 

SlitherySOB

M/L/C
Jul 2, 2004
460
0
0
Durham
Why not just think quick on your feet? "Yeah, she dated a buddy of mine a long time ago and really fucked him over," would have worked. Or something like the friend of a friend you really don't get along with.
 

maxwellsmart

Active member
Apr 11, 2006
2,607
3
38
Control
The best response is no response. All hobbyists should be ready for this type of situation. When you meet an SP outside of the hobby, you must act as if you had never seen them before. For your sake and theirs, the hobby must remain secret. The only exception to this could be if you found yourselves utterly alone together and were assured of privacy. In that case, you could bring up the past relationship. I have been in that situation (more than once and one time was the opposite situation, where I knew the woman in a business situation then was introduced to her in an SP situation) and had to act. I would also say to Slithery that you could easily have said to your woman friend about the waitress "I don't know where I may have met that woman before but she looks familiar. I guess I look familiar to her too"
 
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