Blood Suckers................................

[Siryummy]

Venus and Mercury are the only two planets in the solar system that do not have any moons orbiting around them.
When McDonald's opened an outlet in Kuwait shortly after the end of the Gulf War, the line of cars waiting to eat there was seven miles long.
People were using garlic to repel vampires long before Bram Stoker’s Dracula was published. Folklorists suggest it is because vampires have a heightened sense of smell and the garlic’s strong smell was overpowering. Garlic is proven to be effective against two other bloodsuckers: mosquitoes and ticks. Having already downed a few power drinks, she turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says,
"Listen here, good looking, I will screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, their place, my place, in the car, front door, back door, on the ground, standing up, sitting down, naked or with clothes on... It doesn't matter to me. I just love it." His eyes now wide with interest, he responds,
"No Shit... I'm in Congress too. What state do you represent?

 

[Petzel]

You make absolutely no sense at all.

 

[gcostanza]

You make absolutely no sense at all.

Friend of Rocky's?

 

[Narg]

OP. Lay off the speed before you post.

 

[blackrock13]

OP. Lay off the speed before you post.

 

[skidoo1]

what the F don't get it

 

[wetnose]

Off your meds again?

 

[dirk076]

I saw the title of the thread and though it was about politicians and public sector unions. Ahhh well.....nothing to see here.

 

[Ladyraven]

what??? purple Elephants???

 

[Ms.FemmeFatale]

what??? purple Elephants???

Someone said purple?????

Lol

 

[fun-guy]

Gotta love this country, we let the mentally unstable walk our streets just like anyone else, hopefully without a gun, unless you live in the US, guns are ok for everyone there.

Hope you get better OP.

 

[nobody123]

What's wrong with y'all? Sirummy's post is perfectly coherent, if you know how to read it (remember, the theme here is blood suckers):

Venus and Mercury are the only two planets in the solar system that do not have any moons orbiting around them.

Thereby making them the only two planets where vampires run rampant, unchecked by their natural enemies - werewolves. See? Blood suckers.

When McDonald's opened an outlet in Kuwait shortly after the end of the Gulf War, the line of cars waiting to eat there was seven miles long.

A line of 7 cars with full tanks holds enough gas to drive you from Kuwait to Bulgaria, home of Vlad the Impaler who was the inspiration for Bram Stoker's Dracula. Blood suckers.

People were using garlic to repel vampires long before Bram Stoker’s Dracula was published. Folklorists suggest it is because vampires have a heightened sense of smell and the garlic’s strong smell was overpowering. Garlic is proven to be effective against two other bloodsuckers: mosquitoes and ticks.

Well this one's just too easy!

Having already downed a few power drinks, she turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says,
"Listen here, good looking, I will screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, their place, my place, in the car, front door, back door, on the ground, standing up, sitting down, naked or with clothes on... It doesn't matter to me. I just love it." His eyes now wide with interest, he responds,
"No Shit... I'm in Congress too. What state do you represent?

Well, duh! Politicians are all blood suckers.

 

[Siryummy]

“You bet I am a maniac! That is what built this country, that is what built OUR civilization! That's what it is all about!! That's what reality is. Psyches and intellects and souls on FIRE!!.... GUSTO. LIFE BEING ENJOYED TO IT'S FULLEST! THANKING EVERY,.... THANKING GOD FOR EVERYTHING! The light pouring through the windows, the trees, the birds, the sky, the grass.... Everything is just a -aa magical moment all around you, and you're BORED!?”

 

[Narg]

“You bet I am a maniac! That is what built this country, that is what built OUR civilization! That's what it is all about!! That's what reality is. Psyches and intellects and souls on FIRE!!.... GUSTO. LIFE BEING ENJOYED TO IT'S FULLEST! THANKING EVERY,.... THANKING GOD FOR EVERYTHING! The light pouring through the windows, the trees, the birds, the sky, the grass.... Everything is just a -aa magical moment all around you, and you're BORED!?”

This sounds more like the product of acid than of speed. Best not to do both at once ...

 

[blackrock13]

“You bet I am a maniac! That is what built this country, that is what built OUR civilization! That's what it is all about!! That's what reality is. Psyches and intellects and souls on FIRE!!.... GUSTO. LIFE BEING ENJOYED TO IT'S FULLEST! THANKING EVERY,.... THANKING GOD FOR EVERYTHING! The light pouring through the windows, the trees, the birds, the sky, the grass.... Everything is just a -aa magical moment all around you, and you're BORED!?”

You have a strange definition and perspective of 'maniac'. They didn't build the country. Driven, brave, focused, resourceful, and skilled people did. You ain't them. You should learn to breath when you post.

 

[Siryummy]

The man in red who reads the Law gave him three weeks of life,Three little weeks in which to heal his soul of his soul's strife,And cleanse from every blot of blood
The hand that held the knife.

 

[Baller Time]

A line of 7 cars with full tanks holds enough gas to drive you from Kuwait to Bulgaria, home of Vlad the Impaler who was the inspiration for Bram Stoker's Dracula. Blood suckers.

First wasn't the line 7 miles long? And secondly Vlad the Impaler wasn't from Bulgaria, although Bulgarians are blood thirsty.

 

[nobody123]

First wasn't the line 7 miles long? And secondly Vlad the Impaler wasn't from Bulgaria, although Bulgarians are blood thirsty.

Though Vlad was born in Hungary, (or Transylvania, so close enough), he was a hero of Bulgaria. Or villain. At any rate, the Bulgarians claim him, they can have him.

As for the 7 miles instead of 7 cars: right. Sorry about that. Ummm... errrr.... Gimme a second to pull some non facts out of my ass... ummm..... Got it! 7 miles is the distance all the people old Vlad had impaled would take up if lined up end to end. And as we all know, Vlad was the inspiration mutter mutter dracula mutter mutter therefore - blood sucker. So there!

 

[Butler1000]

Just for FYI.............

If you have to explain a joke........its a crap joke

And this was a crap joke.......even if no explanation was needed

 

[Petzel]

Can someoone call the Center for Mental Health so we can get this psycho committed?