Funny/awkward things that happened to you with an SP?

[Justaguy85]

(I apologize if this thread has been made before, thought it'd be a neat idea)

What are some funny or awkward things that has happened to you before, during, or after a session?

- One SP got her period in the middle of mish, I pulled out of her to switch positions and there was blood on the condom. Regardless, I ended up CIM.

- Had a session with an SP where her 2 girl-friends literally waited outside of sliding doors. She shut the blinds, at least.

- Booked an outcall where this girl wouldn't stop talking to me, even during the sex. It was dirty things, but she just wouldn't shut up.

- During a duo, I proceeded to finish on one of the ladies' boobs, while they proceeded to HJ me towards a finish. They either underestimated how much I would cum, or just didn't want any on them.. so they aimed my member directly at me, providing me with a facial finish.. on myself.

 

[69Shooter]

Yes, it has been done before. My favorite story (can't remember who it was) was the guy whose suit fell off the bathroom door hook where he had it hung. It ended up getting soaking wet. I don't remember the outcome from there.

 

[great bear]

Booked this well known escort for an afternoon. As soon as she entered the room and sat down I became somewhat uncomfortable. She was wearing a short dress and I could not help but notice that her knees and feet looked somewhat manly. Then I noticed her hands looked manly. She had a noticeable adam's apple. She obviously realized I was un-comfortable excused herself and left the room.

Later on I checked some of her reviews and some of the posters mentioned that they had similar feelings to mine that the she was at one time a he. This escort was well known and well reviewed.

 

[TPO]

I was with my all time fav some years ago where a bottle of hand sanitizer was mistaken for lube !

Same lady wiped out in her high heels on the kitchen floor during a dinner date.

No perminent damage in either case but funny story to carry around.

 

[milehigh]

Lots, but the one that takes the cake was really nice girl, and got to know a bit off the job was getting married and retiring.

As we were doing it doggy style in the bedroom with the door open, in walked her friends (who had a key she lent) and they surprised us before she dressed and ran out and told them to wait out in the car. They were picking her up to run around for wedding arrangements.

She finished the full session afterward.

But she did retire, and stayed retired since. Tells me she is planning to have a baby.


It was a bit strange, but I think she was planning to get everything out of her system before settling down.

 

[dirkd101]

I have had had the red monster visit during the session, I'm not a fan of that so needless to say the session ended there. I have had the other girl in the apartment open the door to ask the girl a question, I was drilling her hard, her knees pinned behind her ears, she just looked over and answered her somewhat breathlessly. She apologized, but I found it quite a turn on.

 

[LKD]

(I apologize if this thread has been made before, thought it'd be a neat idea)

What are some funny or awkward things that has happened to you before, during, or after a session?

- One SP got her period in the middle of mish, I pulled out of her to switch positions and there was blood on the condom. Regardless, I ended up CIM.

- Had a session with an SP where her 2 girl-friends literally waited outside of sliding doors. She shut the blinds, at least.

- During a duo, I proceeded to finish on one of the ladies' boobs, while they proceeded to HJ me towards a finish. They either underestimated how much I would cum, or just didn't want any on them.. so they aimed my member directly at me, providing me with a facial finish.. on myself.

hahaha have had similar experiences like you.

While hobbying in Europe, there are places called studios, where you go in, pick your girl and go to a bed in a large studio-like space.. Girl draws a fabric curtain to enclose your space. You can hear other clients with their girls beside and around your area. Kinda like group sex but without the visual or physical contact with other guys.

I'm a huge cummer also... like when I come, I shoot like 10+ times and at great distances. I've had a girl literally get so pissed at me for soaking her body/face and hair even after I told her I shoot big loads.

Like you, I have had sessions where a girl is part way taking the load in her mouth to swallow, then realizes its waaay too much for her and pulls out her mouth causing me to give myself a facial > < xDD Happens when you're halfway lying down on the bed with your head propped up on the headboard.

 

[needinit]

Ran into a friend of a (female) friend that I had met at a party a couple of weeks earlier - it was a great session as she said she had taken a shine to me at the party! so I think I got a bit extra

 

[massman]

Threads been done before, butnwhat the hell.

Yes, done the self facial thing at an mp, I think the mpa was both amazed, and slightly turned on at the time!

One girl had so much self tanner on her body, that my sheets (and my body) were orange after. That shit is hard to wash off, but the bigger prob was I was meeting a friend in my hotel room later, there were these orangey smudge marks all over the hotel sheets, so I just chucked a cup of coffee on the bed and called hk and asked them to replace right away.

Forgot the donation, a couple times till after I left, of course went back right away, but that is awkward.

During Greek once a French Canadian girl warned me I might get a "gift " if we kept at it. Not understanding I went a bit harder/faster. Not exactly the gift i was hoping for, but play with fire, sometimes u will get burned.

Sp left a 1/2 dozen condoms on my front walk after leaving, I didn't notice till about noon the next day. One of the many reasons I no longer outcall to home.

Near misses, slipped in bathroom, no injury, clipped a curb pulling into mp parking lot, dented rim, no flat tho.

Car robbed while at a formerly famous mp. That sucked (tho massage was stellar).

I'm sure there is more

 

[LKD]

Threads been done before, butnwhat the hell.

Yes, done the self facial thing at an mp, I think the mpa was both amazed, and slightly turned on at the time!

One girl had so much self tanner on her body, that my sheets (and my body) were orange after. That shit is hard to wash off, but the bigger prob was I was meeting a friend in my hotel room later, there were these orangey smudge marks all over the hotel sheets, so I just chucked a cup of coffee on the bed and called hk and asked them to replace right away.

Forgot the donation, a couple times till after I left, of course went back right away, but that is awkward.

During Greek once a French Canadian girl warned me I might get a "gift " if we kept at it. Not understanding I went a bit harder/faster. Not exactly the gift i was hoping for, but play with fire, sometimes u will get burned.

Sp left a 1/2 dozen condoms on my front walk after leaving, I didn't notice till about noon the next day. One of the many reasons I no longer outcall to home.

Near misses, slipped in bathroom, no injury, clipped a curb pulling into mp parking lot, dented rim, no flat tho.

Car robbed while at a formerly famous mp. That sucked (tho massage was stellar).

I'm sure there is more

hahaha what was the gift?

has happened to me too where I almost walked out the door without paying the girl... The girl literally had to step infront of the door to stop me from leaving without paying. totally forgot about it which is why I try to pay first with girls i've seen before

 

[massman]

I really try to pay first, but when they meet you at the door with a nice hug, and kiss, that leads to more kisses, groping, loss of clothes, collapsing on the bed...... You get the pic.

And re gift, use yOur imagination, i shouldnt be too hard, and neither was I upon receiving it.

 

[LordLoki]

Oh the list could go on and on,

Flying back from a extended mini Vacation from Washington, SP that was vacationing with me had a key chain with a martial arts device containing throwing spikes. It showed up on Xray. Concealed weapons are an issue in airports. Took some convincing to let us fly on to Toronto.

Went skin diving of Miami Beach with another. She had a great time feeding and playing with fish. Had an allergic reaction though when we got back in the boat. I was so worried. I kept splashing bottled water all over her.

Walking down the street after lunch with an SP and a dancer. Some tourist tells us we look like a very happy and loving family.

One SP looks at her watch and says "times up. I just hit my target. I do not need to escorts or be nice for money any more. Get out. NOW !"

It has been an eventful few years

 

[Coors]

Invited over a new SP for some fun. We have a drink she tells me how she loves to provide the GFE. Lots of kissing, sensual BBBJ, massage the whole nine yards. On my second shot, I'm giving it to her doggy, she has gotten more comfortable and starts to scream "HARDER, HARDER, F--- me like you will never get F----- again ?!" Anyways, she proceeds to tell me to lie down and she will give me the ride of my life. At some point we have switched from her loving GFE / to full-on PSE! She is actually jumping up and down on my dong! Just before I shoot the second load, I am thinking to myself this is feeling way too good!

Somehow, in this crazy ride, the condom has come off of me, and is inside her. And yes I did shoot inside her. Now the awkardness of trying to fish out a condom from inside this girl, a girl I had just met an hour ago. She makes a joke once I finally retreive the condom from inside her, that this a true GFE experience lol, helping me get this thing from inside me!

Looking back now, it is pretty funny, but at the time, getting the STD tests, and her being nervous about being knocked up, it wasn't too cool then!