The ten solitudes of Toronto dating
- Thread starter fuji
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Again, go inbreed, if you think that diversity in your reproductive choices is irrelevant to the survival of your children. You are talking about some irrelevant different point.
You are a fool who loses sight of the point...
Good. Fine. So I win the point, let's move on.
There you go again, attacking a straw man. You are such a 'tard. I have never claimed that cheating is hardwired. I have claimed that some basic desires are hardwired, and that cheating is one of the few ways to satisfy all of them. You keep fucking that up--apparently you are just too dumb to understand what I'm saying?
You can't be serious... I guess you are dumber than I feared.
Hence she is your ex.
Nope. Are you really too dumb to figure it out yourself???? Really????
Yes. That's MY point. Thank you for finally agreeing to it after pages of your idiocy.
What else can "monogamous pair bond" mean, if it does not mean attraction only to the party you are mated with?? You have a pretty novel interpretation of "monogamous" if it does not mean monogamous.
Really you're making such desperately stupid points now, just trying to keep your position alive, except it's long since died. You lost this pages and pages ago.
I'll reply to you if you ever get anything right. So far you haven't been able to demonstrate you even understand what I write, let alone make any sort of coherent reply.
You keep saying that I say cheating is hardwired, and argue against that. Since I never said that, I don't know who you think you are debating with, or what. Certainly it's not a reply to the things I wrote--you live in your own little fantasy world, in which you refute shadows of your own making.
You certainly haven't been able to put a dent in the REAL argument I've made, as opposed to your imaginary version of it.
Read this very slowly, word by word, looking each word up in the dictionary as you go:
1. A desire for multiple simultaneous sexual partners is hard wired into us
2. A desire to have those partners be sexually exclusive is also hard wired into us
Cheating is a resolution of those two hardwired desires. There are other ways to resolve them. Cheating is one way.
You keep saying that I say cheating is hardwired, and argue against that. Since I never said that, I don't know who you think you are debating with, or what. Certainly it's not a reply to the things I wrote--you live in your own little fantasy world, in which you refute shadows of your own making.
You certainly haven't been able to put a dent in the REAL argument I've made, as opposed to your imaginary version of it.
Read this very slowly, word by word, looking each word up in the dictionary as you go:
1. A desire for multiple simultaneous sexual partners is hard wired into us
2. A desire to have those partners be sexually exclusive is also hard wired into us
Cheating is a resolution of those two hardwired desires. There are other ways to resolve them. Cheating is one way.
Fuji's own words
From post #549;;
"I have written many, many, many, many times for you that it's the basic desires that are hardwired, and that behavior like cheating arises as a response to those basic desires. Namely, it is one of the strategies available that satisfies ALL The desires we have."
From posts#539
What is hardwired is a desire for multiple sexual partners and also hardwired is a desire that our partners be monogamous.
From post #521
That's just a fact weather you like it or not. As to the nature/nurture aspect of it, plainly it's going to be a little of both. Our sexual desires are going to be hardwired, and our behaviors are a socialized outlet for our hardwired desires.
Only FUJI thinks he's not sayings cheating is hardwired. He'll dance and he'll duck, but he's not fooling anyone any more. The more he yaps the more members see him for what he is. When was the last time he offered any credible documentation to back all this up. Is he the only person to ever ponder this argument or study it or discuss it and conclude what he has.
It FUJI fact and pontifications
Time to publish FUJI. It'll be a hit with science community.
This was fun. Now back to 'ignore'.
From post #549;;
"I have written many, many, many, many times for you that it's the basic desires that are hardwired, and that behavior like cheating arises as a response to those basic desires. Namely, it is one of the strategies available that satisfies ALL The desires we have."
From posts#539
What is hardwired is a desire for multiple sexual partners and also hardwired is a desire that our partners be monogamous.
From post #521
That's just a fact weather you like it or not. As to the nature/nurture aspect of it, plainly it's going to be a little of both. Our sexual desires are going to be hardwired, and our behaviors are a socialized outlet for our hardwired desires.
Only FUJI thinks he's not sayings cheating is hardwired. He'll dance and he'll duck, but he's not fooling anyone any more. The more he yaps the more members see him for what he is. When was the last time he offered any credible documentation to back all this up. Is he the only person to ever ponder this argument or study it or discuss it and conclude what he has.
It FUJI fact and pontifications
Time to publish FUJI. It'll be a hit with science community.
This was fun. Now back to 'ignore'.
Yes, I stand by exactly what I said in #549, 539, 521 as quoted by blackrock. Being attracted to multiple partners--the thing that is hardwired--doesn't necessarily mean you cheat. They are different concepts. What is hardwired is the desire. Cheating is a response to the desire.
What a complete load of bullshit. Basically you are actually trying to argue that you don't need to respond to the points I'm making, you can invent your own points, pretend I said them, and respond to your invented points. It's understandable that people misunderstand each other now and then, but I've explicitly corrected your interpretation and explicitly pointed out what I meant. Not just once. Repeatedly. And you CONTINUE with your idiotic misrepresentation, and now you are trying to justify it with this abject bullshit.
You are a buffoon.
Correct.
Nope. None are. The desires are hardwired. The responses to those desires are situation dependent.
Absolutely. Now you are catching up, at least a little, to what I was telling you dozens of pages ago.
I never said that. You made that up. That is your invented bullshit interpretation of what I've said, that you made up, because you are a fucking buffoon.
Yes. It is one of several possible instantiations.
False. That doesn't follow in any way, shape, or form. Cheating is ONE response. Whether it's the optimal response for an individual will depend on their situation--on their environment. Other responses may be optimal, depending on their situation. Thus it is NOT hardwired. However, given the right situation, the hardwired stuff gives you a very strong incentive to cheat.
Once you grok this point we can get to the next one, which is that cheating is one of the few responses that fully satisfies all the hardwired desires. Several of the other responses--which may be optimal for an individual in their situation--do not satisfy all the desires, but require the suppression of one or more hardwired desires. Still may be optimal behavior for that individual in that situation. The final step is a value judgement, that it's better to fully satisfy your desires, than to have to suppress them.
There absolutely are power dynamics in all relationships. That doesn't mean we are gorillas or chimps. Our conflicts are much more intelligent. We fight over much more abstract things. But at the end of the day we still find ourselves negotiating our relationships from positions of relative strength or weakness. Our strengths and weaknesses are no longer mere physical strength--though that could certainly be part of the equation--but much more likely social strengths and weaknesses. Success, money, power, status, charisma, charm, things like that, in addition to physical attractiveness.
Absolutely correct. I never made any claim that your relative attractiveness was hardwired in. It absolutely is a complex thing that depends on the total sum of your being.
Nope. You simply have been too stupid, too pig headed, and too full of yourself to actually bother comprehending what I've been saying.
Nope. You still don't get it. You don't even comprehend the argument I'm making. You are just an idiot.
Note I am just going to respond by repeating back that which you should have bothered trying to understand pages and pages ago. You are a retard. Anyway:
Now that we've agreed you have two desires that are in conflict, a desire to have multiple partners, and a desire to have your partners be monogamous. How to reconcile? You have a few ways to "instantiate" this:
1. Fulfill both desires by having multiple partners, while persuading them to be monogamous even though you are not -- by being so attractive they agree
2. Fulfill both desires by having multiple partners, while persuading them to be monogamous even though you are not -- by cheating
3. Suppress the desire to have multiple partners and be monogamous
4. Have multiple partners, but suppress the desire to have them be monogamous, entering into an open relationship
5. Suppress both desires and be celibate
Those are basically your options. You can do more or less of these different choices, they're not binary, but that roughly describes your options.
What is life denying is to suppress a desire when you COULD HAVE fulfilled it. Not everybody CAN fulfill those desires. Not everybody is attractive enough to attract multiple partners. Not everybody is capable enough to get away with cheating. But for those who CAN fulfill both desires it would be life denying NOT to.
This has always been the argument. I have to say, if you are only now comprehending it, after pages and pages of your bullshit, that is really sad.
Nope. You're simply not able to read and comprehend English. That's the only conclusion here. I wrote, repeatdly, all through this thread, what I just wrote above. Practically verbatim in many cases.
I never said that either. Really, how limited is your intelligence?? I said they were too complex for MORALITY. I never said anything about "socio-cultural arrangements", you are making that up.
Actually no I said it before either of you joined the thread, and then all through the thread. You were just too stupid to read and comprehend English, I guess.
Yes. It's still the case. It comes down to whether you are capable of cheating. In a relationship where you are sexually dominant you are able to set the terms in such a way as to be able to enable yourself to cheat. In a relationship where you are the weaker party conditions will be forced on you that make it hard for you to cheat. So your ability to cheat--whether 2 is an option for you or not, realistically--depends on your power in the relationship.
I said something similar to that but you are too stupid to get it quite right. Not everybody has the option of being dominant. Not everybody is attractive enough. It's plainly better to be attractive, but it's not something that people can necessarily change. For an unattractive person some things that an attractive person could do are simply not options that are available. Not everybody is ABLE to cheat. Hell, some people are so ill equipped that they cannot even land a marriage, let alone cheat on one.
I don't expect you to have an intelligent response to this post. You have not made one intelligent response yet, really.. you have never actually demonstrated that you comprehend anything. Never stopped you from blithering on--but stupid people are like that.
You should actually read the thread. Sw1tch has been saying idiotic things for several pages now. He started out trying to make a coherent argument, but after he realized that he simply misunderstood a bunch of stuff he's been throwing up sand.
