Economics 101

[danmand]

Sometime this year, we taxpayers may again receive an Economic Stimulus payment. This is a very exciting new program. I will explain it using the Q andA format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definitionTV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy in China?
A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the Canadian/ USeconomy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go toChina.

* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.

* If you pruchase a computer, it will go to India.

* If you purchase fruit and veggies, it will go to Mexico, Honduras,and Guatemala.

* If you buy a car, it will go to Japan.

* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan.

* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go tomanagement bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

Instead, keep the money in Canada / US by:

1. Spending it at yard sales, OR

2. Going to ball games, OR

3. Spending it on prostitutes, OR

4. Beer, OR

5. Tattoos [These are the only businesses still operating]

So,to go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute from a yardsale and drink beer all day long!

 

[AJstar]

Sorry, but spending on a ball game sends most of the money to the US.So you are just left with a drunken yardsale hooker

 

[danmand]

Sorry, but spending on a ball game sends most of the money to the US.So you are just left with a drunken yardsale hooker

I think the beer money also goes to the US, after Molson sold out.

But what the heck, a tatood hooker is not the worst that can happen.

 

[OddSox]

Hey, I never got a cheque! What goes on here?

 

[Brill]

The hooker could spend the money at WalMart, it's inevitable that the Chinese get it.

Get one that goes for handcrafted made-in-Ontario fuckme boots.

 

[LateComer]

Sorry, but spending on a ball game sends most of the money to the US.So you are just left with a drunken yardsale hooker:

Did Lisa fall off the wagon?

 

[Meister]

Wait a minute there's gotta be some Canadian crap we can spend it on....

Maple Syrup
Canadian Bacon
Eskimo Soap Stone Carvings

Ok, I got nothing else.

Wait, those Canadian Lapel Pins, yes!!

 

[rockl]

Sorry, but spending on a ball game sends most of the money to the US.So you are just left with a drunken yardsale hooker

Sold!

 

[onthebottom]

I'm pretty sure Canadian's still "make" lumber and oil - build a house or drive your car around......

OTB

 

[Yoga Face]

Sometime this year, we taxpayers may again receive an Economic Stimulus payment. This is a very exciting new program. I will explain it using the Q andA format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

I think you are wrong here but correct me if I am

The government prints the money

but wait

that is wrong too!

Banks print the money and the government borrows from the bank and pays them interest for money the banks never had instead of printing the money themselves !


Am I wrong?