You Can't Make this Shit Up

[onomatopoeia]

About eight o'clock this morning, I was walking in the residential part of Gerrard Street East in Cabbagetown. A small man around 40 years old who looked like he might be Filipino approached me, and asked, in a low voice, if I knew where he could find 'coppo'.

I didn't understand what he meant. I said 'Do you mean the police?', and he shook his head to say no. I asked him if he was looking for copper, because he might be trying to collect scrap metal. Then he said "I write it down".

He took out his phone, and started typing. When he was finished, he handed the phone to me. He had typed "I'm looking for couple. I like to watch".

 

[Robert Mugabe]

About eight o'clock this morning, I was walking in the residential part of Gerrard Street East in Cabbagetown. A small man around 40 years old who looked like he might be Filipino approached me, and asked, in a low voice, if I knew where he could find 'coppo'.

I didn't understand what he meant. I said 'Do you mean the police?', and he shook his head to say no. I asked him if he was looking for copper, because he might be trying to collect scrap metal. Then he said "I write it down".

He took out his phone, and started typing. When he was finished, he handed the phone to me. He had typed "I'm looking for couple. I like to watch".

And?.........

 

[SchlongConery]

And?.........

Put your lube and dick away Bob. That was the end of the story!

 

[gabersc]

About eight o'clock this morning, I was walking in the residential part of Gerrard Street East in Cabbagetown. A small man around 40 years old who looked like he might be Filipino approached me, and asked, in a low voice, if I knew where he could find 'coppo'.

I didn't understand what he meant. I said 'Do you mean the police?', and he shook his head to say no. I asked him if he was looking for copper, because he might be trying to collect scrap metal. Then he said "I write it down".

He took out his phone, and started typing. When he was finished, he handed the phone to me. He had typed "I'm looking for couple. I like to watch".

This cannot be true.

 

[Darts]

He took out his phone, and started typing.

Actually, this is getting fairly common by people who don't speak English.

I was recently approached by two women who spoke Spanish but not English. So, one of them pulled out her cell and showed me the message: "where is rental office?"

 

[onomatopoeia]

This cannot be true.

100% true, bro. When I post bullshit on this board, it's obvious. I don't do prank humour, ever. Telling lies to try to fool people is not my idea of funny.

 

[onomatopoeia]

Actually, this is getting fairly common by people who don't speak English.

I was recently approached by two women who spoke Spanish but not English. So, one of them pulled out her cell and showed me the message: "where is rental office?"

They could have typed the message in Spanish, and used google translate to convert the text to English. My guy this morning might have done that with Spanish or Tagalog.

 

[Darts]

They could have typed the message in Spanish, and used google translate to convert the text to English.

I think that is what she did. She didn't show me the Spanish version only the English.

I saw the same at a Rogers store a few years ago. Guy walked in and didn't speak English so he used his cell to convert Spanish to English.

 

[Robert Mugabe]

300 years

• According to 2 sources

In the Philippines, Spain ruled over 300 years until 1898, when the United States defeated the Spanish Empire during the Spanish-American War.

And yet most of them hardly speak a word of Spanish. I work with over a hundred of them and they use pero and trabajo in their conversations but that is about it.
I said to one the other day "mi casa is su casa"
Didn't have a clue what I was saying. I repeated it a few times for her because she wanted to pick it up. Like I had discovered nuclear fission or something.

 

[onomatopoeia]

The only Spanish I know is La Jueves sera su dia libre.

 

[The Oracle]

About eight o'clock this morning, I was walking in the residential part of Gerrard Street East in Cabbagetown. A small man around 40 years old who looked like he might be Filipino approached me, and asked, in a low voice, if I knew where he could find 'coppo'.

I didn't understand what he meant. I said 'Do you mean the police?', and he shook his head to say no. I asked him if he was looking for copper, because he might be trying to collect scrap metal. Then he said "I write it down".

He took out his phone, and started typing. When he was finished, he handed the phone to me. He had typed "I'm looking for couple. I like to watch".

Man I laughed hard at this...It made my day.

But I was pondering...Why was it you he thought to ask?

 

[whynot888]

100% true, bro. When I post bullshit on this board, it's obvious. I don't do prank humour, ever. Telling lies to try to fool people is not my idea of funny.

Can't blame the dude because alot of idiots here pull this shit with their reviews.

 

[onomatopoeia]

Man I laughed hard at this...It made my day.

But I was pondering...Why was it you he thought to ask?

I was the only person on the sidewalk at eight AM.

 

[Darts]

In the Philippines, Spain ruled over 300 years until 1898, when the United States defeated the Spanish Empire during the Spanish-American War.

Blame Rudyard Kipling.

 

[Adam_hadam]

And?.........

 

[eddie kerr]

The only Spanish I know is La Jueves sera su dia libre.

I know "Dande Esta La Banyo". Translation?? Where is the toilet?.

 

[NotADcotor]

He took out his phone, and started typing. When he was finished, he handed the phone to me. He had typed "I'm looking for couple. I like to watch".

That is fucked up, you can't just watch, you have to join in because it's not gay if it's a threeway but one must assume if you are watching it is gay.

 

[xix]

Maybe he was looking for young couples making out in the park so he wanted to watch the kissing.

I find it odd they don't know that many words in Spanish but yet most seem to have Spanish last names.

 

[onomatopoeia]

That is fucked up, you can't just watch, you have to join in because it's not gay if it's a threeway but one must assume if you are watching it is gay.

So, you're suggesting that watching a heterosexual couple have sex is gay. Clearly you are not a Dcotor.

 

[onomatopoeia]

Maybe he was looking for young couples making out in the park so he wanted to watch the kissing.

I find it odd they don't know that many words in Spanish but yet most seem to have Spanish last names.

Probably not a lot of PDAs at eight AM on a Sunday in a residential neighbourhood.