What's going on here from a man's perspective

[SinnamonFairbanks]

I had a potential client who was terrible at communicating , and it felt like pulling teeth. I was about ready to block them when they finally decided to book. They didn't want to leave me much time and I said I couldn't accommodate the time that they wanted...

They're telling me they just came to my town specifically to see me , but they didn't make any plans with me. We mutually agreed that the time frame we were looking at didn't work for either of us. I thought that was the end of it.

Now this person is apparently in my town.Acting like I owe them something... Because they showed up without ever making plans with me.

Is this a joke? Are they schizophrenic? or are people that stupid?

I have a hard time wrapping my head around the entitlement that I should drop everything.I'm doing to accommodate a person who never made plans with me to begin with.

They just assumed I would be available , and they just assumed I would make myself available. I went out.I have christmas shopping to do.

I basically said I had a hard time having empathy for a person who never made plans with me. Do people genuinely believe that providers will drop everything they're doing? Do they assume we have no life? Is that like a mental health thing or an entitlement thing?

This Isn't the first time I've dealt with this level of entitlement. It happens every once in a while , and i've always blown away by how selfish people can be.

Sometimes I think it's because they think i'm a crackhead , but I live in an area where every house is like a million dollars and that doesn't mean much by today's standards , but I don't work in a crackhead neighborhood.

I would argue that it's a lot nicer than where a lot of people live.

I try to be as accommodating as possible, but it's insane to show up somewhere and you don't even have an agreed upon time. Did he think he could just show up whenever he wanted.What if I wasn't even there? What if I had a client? Wtf. He really was pushing for my address too.So he would have just showed up whenever he felt like it.

I am really restrictive about giving out my address.I hope that all the crazies lose interest in me by the time their appointment rolls around so most of the time , they never even get to the point of getting my address...

Am I ever grateful this person is so terrible at communicating.They didn't even get my address.

Part of me thinks this person is just crazy , but they're not unique. It's almost like this guy expected me to read his mind. I was just supposed to know what he was thinking.

I blocked him and I'm not here to complain about him.I'm just wondering what he was thinking? His spelling was so terrible at some points I asked him if he was drunk and he coherently replied that he was not drunk.

It did occur to me as I was writing this that maybe he thought this was like a spa he could walk into, because maybe that's all he knows.

When people do something crazy or stupid.I always want to know why. I want to know why people do things. I'm always questioning people's motivations. So i'm going to come up with a hundred different things , and settle for the most plausible explanation.

It's a toss up between... He either thought this was a spa he could walk into... Or he's schizophrenic.

Has anyone here ever shown up to meet someone without letting the person know they're coming?

That's weird as *** right? I shouldn't have to explain that? Part of me feels bad that this strange person apparently drove all this way But then part of me thinks it's big joke , and I shouldn't feel bad at all because this person is just pulling my leg. It might all be a horrible time wasting joke

 

[Knuckle Ball]

It sounds like there is something off with this guy. I don’t know what he might be thinking but he sounds like a demanding, disorganized kinda person.

Who drives all the way to another city hoping to see an SP with no appointment and no agreement to get together? He sounds like a guy who just wants what he wants and has no concept of other people’s needs.

I think you were wise to block him.

 

[Oral-Bee]

Why are you calling him "they"??

 

[SinnamonFairbanks]

Why are you calling him "they"??

Oh.... I don't know people always point out mistakes that I make in my writing. I don't really mean anything by it. I don't know their name and I don't know anything about them.

I make a lot of mistakes like that, an English person would point out but I think maybe it's just because I'm French. I just meant they in terms of...them. them/they.

I don't know how to explain it.Only english people point this out to me.

I would reference you the same way if I didn't know your name.

I honestly don't know if it's a man or a woman either. I do have my suspicions that this is so ridiculous it could be a woman just f****** with me.

Im the first generation in my family to learn English first and I think its just a bad habit.

English people are always on my case about saying "they" and what I mean is more referencing some ambiguous person.

Its a bad habit.

 

[Trevor Wong]

Oh I don't know people always point out mistakes that I make in my writing. I don't really mean anything by it. I don't know their name and I don't know anything about them.

I make a lot of mistakes like that than an english person would point out but I think maybe it's just because I'm French. I just meant they in terms of...them. them/they.

I don't know how to explain it.Only english people point this out to me

I guess when you say "they", it implies two or more potential clients, and not just one. I can't speak a word of French, so I totally admire you for being bilingual.

 

[whitewaterguy]

Why are you calling him "they"??

What’s the intent driving your question ?
The lady is sharing an unfortunate story which seemingly exasperated her , and you’re pulling a grammar Police shtick ?zero social IQ and devoid of empathy is my guess . On the spectrum ? Drive a Tesla ?

 

[Oral-Bee]

I'm not correcting you or pointing out any mistakes. It's just you mixed he/him with they/them, all in the same thread and reference to the same individual. For that reason I asked. To get some clarity.

 

[SinnamonFairbanks]

I guess when you say "they", it implies two or more potential clients, and not just one. I can't speak a word of French, so I totally admire you for being bilingual.

Makes sense. I think its just a family thing I picked up that doesnt really make sense but it feels right. I still write in Franglaise lol

Him and they in French sound exactly that same. Maybe I just apply it to English too. I dont know im doing it until someone points it out lol

I also don't necessarily know their gender because I don't know who i'm talking to. I get women who contact me too so I never assume that I'm speaking to a man.

 

[SinnamonFairbanks]

I'm not correcting you or pointing out any mistakes. It's just you mixed he/him with they/them, all in the same thread and reference to the same individual. For that reason I asked. To get some clarity.

Him and they sound exactly the same in French so its a bad habit I just applied to English I guess. Its not as interchangeable as I think it is.

I just used "they" twice again and corrected it. Its gotta be a language thing. Im going to try and catch myself doing it more

 

[whitewaterguy]

I'm not correcting you or pointing out any mistakes. It's just you mixed he/him with they/them, all in the same thread and reference to the same individual. For that reason I asked. To get some clarity.

Naa you’re just being a dweeb,….dude. Grow up. Sounds like you could actually be the caller in question

 

[Forzafonz]

Oh, hey it was me!


Yes, as a white male i assume that all providers have no life, no plans, are crackheads who live in a crackhead neighborhood and can accommodate me at any time and dying to do so. Also, i go by their Majesty/their Majesties, not they/them. Please use right pronounces next time and thank you.

Kind regards,
Meow Meow

 

[SinnamonFairbanks]

Well when you put it that way , it really puts it into perspective.

I think it was just someone messing with me.

there's no way anyone's that entitled.

I keep changing my mind on exactly what happened , but I think i'm coming to terms with the fact that it was someone playing a prank or a crazy person.

Oh, hey it was me!


Yes, as a white male i assume that all providers have no life, no plans, are crackheads who live in a crackhead neighborhood and can accommodate me at any time and dying to do so. Also, i go by their Majesty/their Majesties, not they/them. Please use right pronounces next time and thank you.

Kind regards,
Meow Meow

 

[Knuckle Ball]

Well when you put it that way , it really puts it into perspective.

I think it was just someone messing with me.

there's no way anyone's that entitled.

I keep changing my mind on exactly what happened , but I think i'm coming to terms with the fact that it was someone playing a prank or a crazy person.

I lean towards it being a crazy person…or at least someone who is a bit slow or is perhaps on the autism spectrum?

I dunno…but something is definitely off with that guy.

 

[xix]

I work in a factory ( just for argument sakes ). It doesn't matter the gender, intelligence ( high school, college or Uni) , Country ( culture).
People are just NUTS.
I labeled them DAIEEN - Delusional, Arrogant, Ignorant, Entitled, Egotistical, Narc. and Crazy.

I think you have a mental case person / client. At least you get to block or ignore them, I can't do that at work.

 

[HungSowel]

Some people actually believe the customer is always right, f*ck those people.

 

[BiggerTitsTheBetter]

Well when you put it that way , it really puts it into perspective.

I think it was just someone messing with me.

there's no way anyone's that entitled.

I keep changing my mind on exactly what happened , but I think i'm coming to terms with the fact that it was someone playing a prank or a crazy person.

I do not think it was a prank. You are underestimating how unbalanced some people can be.

To me this sounds like someone with a severe case of narcissism. I think they made up the story about "travelling to your city just to see you". Narcissists often make up things to justify their behavior, and they actually BELIEVE their own lies.

 

[PvtJoker]

Dumb and socially retarded guys like sex just as much as normal guys, but….…
..dumb and socially retarded guys can’t get civi women (not even dumb and socially retarded women), so….
…dumb and socially retarded guys have to pay hookers for sex….
…you are a hooker…
…so, from a man’s perspective, this just amounts to a predictable hazard of the trade…

 

[MindJohn]

Makes sense. I think its just a family thing I picked up that doesnt really make sense but it feels right. I still write in Franglaise lol

Him and they in French sound exactly that same. Maybe I just apply it to English too. I dont know im doing it until someone points it out lol

I also don't necessarily know their gender because I don't know who i'm talking to. I get women who contact me too so I never assume that I'm speaking to a man.

I paused at the "they" thing, first guessing it was "modern PC" efforts.

But wow, your responses on that subject were amazing, really. They "fit" your now-seemingly-very-independent application of "they".

(I'm just warming up to respond your actual concern here)

 

[MindJohn]

I had a potential client who was terrible at communicating , and it felt like pulling teeth. I was about ready to block them when they finally decided to book. They didn't want to leave me much time and I said I couldn't accommodate the time that they wanted...

They're telling me they just came to my town specifically to see me , but they didn't make any plans with me. We mutually agreed that the time frame we were looking at didn't work for either of us. I thought that was the end of it.

Now this person is apparently in my town.Acting like I owe them something... Because they showed up without ever making plans with me.

Is this a joke? Are they schizophrenic? or are people that stupid?

I have a hard time wrapping my head around the entitlement that I should drop everything.I'm doing to accommodate a person who never made plans with me to begin with.

They just assumed I would be available , and they just assumed I would make myself available. I went out.I have christmas shopping to do.

I basically said I had a hard time having empathy for a person who never made plans with me. Do people genuinely believe that providers will drop everything they're doing? Do they assume we have no life? Is that like a mental health thing or an entitlement thing?

This Isn't the first time I've dealt with this level of entitlement. It happens every once in a while , and i've always blown away by how selfish people can be.

Sometimes I think it's because they think i'm a crackhead , but I live in an area where every house is like a million dollars and that doesn't mean much by today's standards , but I don't work in a crackhead neighborhood.

I would argue that it's a lot nicer than where a lot of people live.

I try to be as accommodating as possible, but it's insane to show up somewhere and you don't even have an agreed upon time. Did he think he could just show up whenever he wanted.What if I wasn't even there? What if I had a client? Wtf. He really was pushing for my address too.So he would have just showed up whenever he felt like it.

I am really restrictive about giving out my address.I hope that all the crazies lose interest in me by the time their appointment rolls around so most of the time , they never even get to the point of getting my address...

Am I ever grateful this person is so terrible at communicating.They didn't even get my address.

Part of me thinks this person is just crazy , but they're not unique. It's almost like this guy expected me to read his mind. I was just supposed to know what he was thinking.

I blocked him and I'm not here to complain about him.I'm just wondering what he was thinking? His spelling was so terrible at some points I asked him if he was drunk and he coherently replied that he was not drunk.

It did occur to me as I was writing this that maybe he thought this was like a spa he could walk into, because maybe that's all he knows.

When people do something crazy or stupid.I always want to know why. I want to know why people do things. I'm always questioning people's motivations. So i'm going to come up with a hundred different things , and settle for the most plausible explanation.

It's a toss up between... He either thought this was a spa he could walk into... Or he's schizophrenic.

Has anyone here ever shown up to meet someone without letting the person know they're coming?

That's weird as *** right? I shouldn't have to explain that? Part of me feels bad that this strange person apparently drove all this way But then part of me thinks it's big joke , and I shouldn't feel bad at all because this person is just pulling my leg. It might all be a horrible time wasting joke

I... lean hard toward believing that this person is not someone to be particularly concerned over. I am guessing, too, that he does not have a long history of escorts with whom he has previously scheduled/booked and actually visited.

(this doesn't count women found on streetcorners, or in brothels or the like)

I... just get a vibe that the person really does allow himself to believe that (any and all escorts are there, nearby to their phones on the chance that he might call )

Still guessing when imagining the person in question not letting his mind encounter the thought that many other men are as interested in time spent with you, as he is.


I don't know intuitively just how significant (I.E. out of the way) it is for him to have been in your town but it seems possible/realistic that perhaps your town now holds added appeal because you are (perceived to be) there. Such that, maybe he had errands or holiday travel which drew him somewhere near to your town, and because he was indeed there, his interest in trying to book time with you became a greater priority.

If you were (the furnace guy)... surely it would be much easier for this dude to comprehend that you always adhere to a schedule, and that there is a set process through which to book an appointment to have your furnace assessed/fixed.

In this case, you're already something of a fantasy.... and thus it isn't too great a stretch from there to imagine you with nothing to do but to await his potential call, and avail yourself to his every whim upon hearing that phone ring. (with appropriate excitement and eager anticipation on your end)

My concise guess is that your first line/instinct/assessment was correct.


I also think that if he called you and jumped through all of your appropriate hoops tomorrow, that he most likely would ascend to the level of (just another successful client meeting) no matter how this began.


I do applaud the routine of having a nearby-ish landmark to use when telling him to go to a certain place and only then call to have you finally offer the address.

If this guy gets to that point, and sees the {familiar-to-you details which any sincere soon-to-be client sees when phoning you from that precise spot} ... then he probably won't be especially risky during the final stages.


Hope this eases your concerns in some small way.

 

[escortsxxx]

I had a potential client who was terrible at communicating , and it felt like pulling teeth. I was about ready to block them when they finally decided to book. They didn't want to leave me much time and I said I couldn't accommodate the time that they wanted...

They're telling me they just came to my town specifically to see me , but they didn't make any plans with me. We mutually agreed that the time frame we were looking at didn't work for either of us. I thought that was the end of it.

Now this person is apparently in my town.Acting like I owe them something... Because they showed up without ever making plans with me.

Is this a joke? Are they schizophrenic? or are people that stupid?

I have a hard time wrapping my head around the entitlement that I should drop everything.I'm doing to accommodate a person who never made plans with me to begin with.

They just assumed I would be available , and they just assumed I would make myself available. I went out.I have christmas shopping to do.

I basically said I had a hard time having empathy for a person who never made plans with me. Do people genuinely believe that providers will drop everything they're doing? Do they assume we have no life? Is that like a mental health thing or an entitlement thing?

This Isn't the first time I've dealt with this level of entitlement. It happens every once in a while , and i've always blown away by how selfish people can be.

Sometimes I think it's because they think i'm a crackhead , but I live in an area where every house is like a million dollars and that doesn't mean much by today's standards , but I don't work in a crackhead neighborhood.

I would argue that it's a lot nicer than where a lot of people live.

I try to be as accommodating as possible, but it's insane to show up somewhere and you don't even have an agreed upon time. Did he think he could just show up whenever he wanted.What if I wasn't even there? What if I had a client? Wtf. He really was pushing for my address too.So he would have just showed up whenever he felt like it.

I am really restrictive about giving out my address.I hope that all the crazies lose interest in me by the time their appointment rolls around so most of the time , they never even get to the point of getting my address...

Am I ever grateful this person is so terrible at communicating.They didn't even get my address.

Part of me thinks this person is just crazy , but they're not unique. It's almost like this guy expected me to read his mind. I was just supposed to know what he was thinking.

I blocked him and I'm not here to complain about him.I'm just wondering what he was thinking? His spelling was so terrible at some points I asked him if he was drunk and he coherently replied that he was not drunk.

It did occur to me as I was writing this that maybe he thought this was like a spa he could walk into, because maybe that's all he knows.

When people do something crazy or stupid.I always want to know why. I want to know why people do things. I'm always questioning people's motivations. So i'm going to come up with a hundred different things , and settle for the most plausible explanation.

It's a toss up between... He either thought this was a spa he could walk into... Or he's schizophrenic.

Has anyone here ever shown up to meet someone without letting the person know they're coming?

That's weird as *** right? I shouldn't have to explain that? Part of me feels bad that this strange person apparently drove all this way But then part of me thinks it's big joke , and I shouldn't feel bad at all because this person is just pulling my leg. It might all be a horrible time wasting joke

its complicated. the fragmentation of the industry in the last 5 years has damaged social contracts,