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Top 10 signs you're a fundamentalist christian

Questor

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Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian (from best of craigslist)

10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
 

Blake659

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Mar 31, 2006
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Very good

Interesting List

But when it comes to Faith..any Faith...how does one argue against it.....you can't argue the abstractness of FAITH..........
 
Questor...Don't you see the irony in your post?
You Mock Fundamentals..and bring out the old cherry that many atheists/agnostics are SO much more tolerant than people of faith.
Why...? Do you think your mockery will break someones heartfelt faith?
I doubt it friend.
 

humbucker

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Jul 16, 2005
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I think that if you just replaced a few words, this list can be applied to any belief system (atheist, agnostic, islamic)... I couldn't really consider taking this too seriously...
 
humbucker said:
I couldn't really consider taking this too seriously...
I might be going out on a limb here, but I'm pretty certain that this wasn't meant to be taken too seriously...

Personally, I think it's a keeper...

ted9488 said:
but we all worship pussy.
Praise the Lord and pass the KY! :)
 

Berlin

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1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
Dang ... that's me.
 

papasmerf

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And the number one reason to be Christian is you make darwinists upset
 

gramage

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humbucker said:
I think that if you just replaced a few words, this list can be applied to any belief system (atheist, agnostic, islamic)... I couldn't really consider taking this too seriously...
how can you attack agnostics? isn't there belief system "shit I dunno."?
 

papasmerf

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gramage said:
how can you attack agnostics? isn't there belief system "shit I dunno."?
one must belive in the possible existance of something to deny it
 

gramage

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papasmerf said:
one must belive in the possible existance of something to deny it
but atheism is the belief in NO god. I always thought agnostics figured a god could exist but did not believe in any organized religion. I mean I always identify as agnostic when asked because the only thing I believe in is my complete inability to know the answer if there even is one, but I may be mis-identifying myself.
 

yoniluvrca

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gramage said:
but atheism is the belief in NO god. I always thought agnostics figured a god could exist but did not believe in any organized religion. I mean I always identify as agnostic when asked because the only thing I believe in is my complete inability to know the answer if there even is one, but I may be mis-identifying myself.
An agnostic is a person who recognizes that s/he does not know if there is a god/supreme being or not.

An Agnostic [1] [noun] [OW] embraces a worldview in which the existence of deity is unknown or unknowable. Derives from the Greek agnostos, a = without, gnostos = known or knowledge. "Agnostic[ism] [CE] was coined by Professor TH Huxley in 1869 to describe the mental attitude of one who regarded as futile all attempts to know the reality corresponding to our ultimate scientific, philosophic, and religious ideas."
 

C Dick

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Feb 2, 2002
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So the atheist can be just as arrogant and condescending about his beliefs, he is just another kind of believer. The agnostic on the other hand has confusion as his belief, so he is not really in a position to ridicule anyone else. In my experience, most people with strong religious beliefs, or atheist beliefs, are still pretty tolerant of other's beliefs. It is just the relatively few nutcases who believe they are right and everyone else is wrong who get the attention.
 

Questor

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C Dick said:
It is just the relatively few nutcases who believe they are right and everyone else is wrong who get the attention.
Yes, that is correct. The fundamentalists. Like George Bush.
 
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