> >I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
> >much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
> >never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
> >
> >FOR EXAMPLE:
> >
> >One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well,
> >the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like
> >it, I just want you to hold me.'
> >
> >I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'
> >
> >So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
> >
> >'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
> >to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'
> >
> >She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who
> >I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'
> >
> >Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
> >
> >The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
> >her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
> >unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
> >several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to
> >take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
> >compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'
> >
> >We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond
> >earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I
> >was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me
> >because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to
> >play tennis.
> >
> >I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was
> >almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with
> >excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
> >dear, let's go to the cashier.'
> >
> >I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel
> >like it.'
> >
> >Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
> >'WHAT?'
> >
> >I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're
> >just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy
> >your shopping needs as a woman.'
> >
> >And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
> >'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'
> >
> >Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch
> >knows I'm smarter than her.
> >much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
> >never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
> >
> >FOR EXAMPLE:
> >
> >One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well,
> >the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like
> >it, I just want you to hold me.'
> >
> >I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'
> >
> >So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
> >
> >'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
> >to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'
> >
> >She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who
> >I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'
> >
> >Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
> >
> >The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
> >her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
> >unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
> >several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to
> >take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
> >compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'
> >
> >We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond
> >earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I
> >was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me
> >because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to
> >play tennis.
> >
> >I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was
> >almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with
> >excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
> >dear, let's go to the cashier.'
> >
> >I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel
> >like it.'
> >
> >Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
> >'WHAT?'
> >
> >I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're
> >just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy
> >your shopping needs as a woman.'
> >
> >And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
> >'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'
> >
> >Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch
> >knows I'm smarter than her.
