Opening a Conversation: Men’s Mental Health and the Industry 💚

[massman]

A few thoughts, as someone who has had mental health struggles and participates in this industry. A visit with a great SP or MPA can really help one escape reality, and get a brief reprieve from the things that are troubling you at work, home or even in your own mind. However it’s a mistake to begin to rely on it t cope. In this case it’s no different than alcohol or drugs, and can lead you into addiction, financial trouble thus compounding your struggles, or you will develop an unhealthy “connection” with a paid provider to try to make up for what is missing, which is doomed to fail. Just as it’s ok to treat yourself to a decadent meal, a couple beers, a joint etc to escape for a few minutes and de stress, same with a visit to a SW. Consider it a “treat”, a brief escape, but never let it become a constant need to make up for the troubles in your life or mind.

As for what SPs / spas/ agencies can do in these settings? Simple. Treat us with kindness and professionalism. Make seeing a SP stress free. In the room, a friendly, kind and generous attitude makes the whole thing much more relaxing and enjoyable.

 

[Theredmilf]

I will say something that might be unpopular, but I feel it needs to be said.

It is not the responsibility of women, be they SW or not, to be responsible for fixing the mental issues of men. That puts a burden on women that they do not need, and it has an unfortunate side effect of spreading a sense of entitlement amongst men (especially young men who may not be fully emotionally matured) to intimacy (be it sexual or otherwise) about getting it from women. 35+ years ago, when I was an immature teen, I had an attitude that would be close to that of an incel if it had been today. Luckily, I grew out of it.

Now to the main topic.

What can SW do to help the mental health of men? For me, due to a dead bedroom, it is intimacy. Hugs when I walk in the door. "Bisous" on the cheek (if the SW is francophone). Small talk and not rushing the encounter to the slippy/slidey bits. I enjoy reverse massage a lot, and I really enjoy seeing/hearing a SW clearly enjoy themselves with what I am doing to them.

Post-act, I like cuddling. Some small talk. @Theredmilf is AMAZING at that the one time I saw her. I had lots of fun with her (or, to be precise, her with me) but it is the relaxing, cuddling and light caresses afterwards that really, really stuck in my mind.



As a fellow dude who is closer to the hairiness of a gorilla than a human, I feel your pain.

If you are interested, I can give you the name of a worker who is turned on by hairy dudes.

What a thoughtful post and thank you for your generous compliment

There are many factors that have led to the decline of our mental health, while many are personal and biological, they all are impacted by the world and structures around us. In the broadest view, we’ve moved far away from how humans are naturally meant to live. I see the healthiest men are those who claim their power back by taking ownership over their lives, developing caring friendships with other men and seeking out things like fitness and mental health modalities. It’s really encouraging to see men doing this.

From my perspective, I see our intimacy as an opportunity to bring more than just play and relaxation into the encounter, but share vulnerability and healing. We take a moment to just breathe together, skin-to-skin with nothing else to worry about. We can practice the lost art of simply being present together. When we feel appreciated and cared for, stripped of all the masks, we share our authentic selves. It’s very human, honest and peaceful.

 

[Moulin Rouge]

Thank you @madelineklaire for starting the ball rolling. Im in my 60s and have been married since 29yrs old and before that we were going out since I was 23 and she was 20. Sex between my wife and I has always been something we did when we felt the need to. We never talked about it, we just went at it like bunnies. However, as we grew older, sex became stagnate and my wife became disinterested as she became menopausal.
I however, never lost the urge and reverted to masterbation. Living the rest of my living years and only looking towards my next masterbation session didn't sit well with me. I didn't want to cheat on my wife and certainly didn't want to have any affairs, but how do you get over this mental block without causing any pain?
When I discovered these spas my life changed. These were a safe place where I could be myself and let my sexual urgues be released with no attachments whatsover. This was truly a body and mind psycho therapy session. I felt like a new man and it did me more good than anything else in the whole world, life was great after that.
I did get addicted to it and after so many sessions the worst happened. I got caught. My wife saw a booking email and i was guilty. I told her the truth about what i needed and she woke up and became an nymphomaniac.
Because I had studied the female psyche and sexual anatomy so well and after so many sessions I knew how to be a good client and knew how to satisfy my MA or my SP that I could apply these skills on my wife. Before that, i had no idea how to satisfy a women.
Now my wife and I literally have sex every night. She's never squirted before in her life and she's now squiring so much that we're going to have to replace the carpets in our bedroom. Im also now at a point where im shooting out bone marrow.
What you can take from this story is, if you're sexually depressed, talk to your partner. If not then these spas will help you a lot. They are there to help you, not to judge you. Think of yourself first, be selfish for once. We've only got this one life to live. This experience changed my life

 

[value_hunter]

Thank you @madelineklaire for starting the ball rolling. Im in my 60s and have been married since 29yrs old and before that we were going out since I was 23 and she was 20. Sex between my wife and I has always been something we did when we felt the need to. We never talked about it, we just went at it like bunnies. However, as we grew older, sex became stagnate and my wife became disinterested as she became menopausal. I however, never lost the urge and reverted to masterbation. Living the rest of my living years and only looking towards my next masterbation session didn't sit well with me. I didn't want to cheat on my wife and certainly didn't want to have any affairs, but how do you get over this mental block without causing any pain? When i discovered these spas my life changed. These were a safe place where i could be myself and let my sexual urgues be released with no attachments whatsover. This was truly a body and mind psycho therapy session. I felt like a new man and it did me more good than anything else in the whole world, life was great after that. I did get addicted to it and after so many sessions the worst happened. I got caught. My wife saw a booking email and i was guilty. I told her the truth about what i needed and she woke up and became an nymphomaniac. Because I had studied the female psyche and sexual anatomy so well and after so many sessions I knew how to be a good client and knew how to satisfy my MA or my SP that I could apply these skills on my wife. Before that, i had no idea how to satisfy a women. Now my wife and I literally have sex every night. She's never squirted before in her life and she's now squiring so much that we're going to have to replace the carpets in our bedroom. Im also now at a point where im shooting out bone marrow.
What you can take from this story is, if you're sexually depressed, talk to your partner. If not then these spas will help you a lot. They are there to help you, not to judge you. Think of yourself first, be selfish for once. We've only got this one life to live. This experience changed my life

Despite the lack of paragraphs, this a beautiful story and well worth reading!

Thank you for sharing it.

I've also learnt so much about women, myself, and humanity from my experiences here.

 

[OliverHush]

Thank you for starting this thread and conversation, it's a really important one to have! I'd like to chime in as a male provider, as I feel like for myself and my clients, it's a bit of a different experience than what's standard in this industry. While I do see some clients who are very comfortable in their sexuality, I tend to see clients who are curious about men, or who are experiencing a man for the first time. And while some are understandably very shy, sometimes there is a sense of shame or embarrassment from clients. And I want you to know that feeling ashamed/embarrassed is okay, and it's pretty normal. A lot of men have internalized homophobia, including men who are openly queer, and sometimes it can take a long time to work through those feelings. If you're feeling this way, please know that it's a normal experience, and there is nothing wrong or bad about it. You're not a bad person for being attracted to men, and conversely, you're also not a bad person if you're not attracted to men. A great part of being human is getting to try new experiences and seeing what you like and don't like!

On a more personal note, I'd love to see the industry become less stigmatized towards homosexuality, so that queer clients and providers, regardless of gender, can openly have these conversations more often and find community and support. Being a male provider can be a pretty lonely or isolating experience at times

 

[Moulin Rouge]

Despite the lack of paragraphs, this a beautiful story and well worth reading!

Thank you for sharing it.

I've also learnt so much about women, myself, and humanity from my experiences here.

Thx Hunter. Glad you liked it and you're right, it needed paragraphs. So I fixed it.