Need advice on dating

[stinkynuts]

I was introduced to this very pretty girl through a mutual friend at a party. She is single and seemed to like me. I did not ask her for her contact info because I didn't want to seem too desperate or aggressive. Was this the correct move?

Now, what do I do now? I am afraid if I wait, she will be taken because she is so hot. Should I ask my friend for her email or phone number and contact her? Or should I wait until we meet next time (could be weeks) to ask her?

I am tired of not getting a girlfriend because of my lack of confidence and assertiveness. I can't tell you how many girls I never pursued, even though I thought there was a chance. The one time I was very aggressive, I only scared her away. But I don't regret that incident more than the girls I never pursued, and will always be left wondering what could have been.

What is the next step in this game? Wait until we meet again, email her, or phone her, ask my friend to ask her how she feels about me, or something else? Even if I do contact her, what do I say? She may or may not be the one, but I can't let another chance pass me by, because these occurences are so rare for me. Sorry for sounding like a teenager on his first date, but it's just that I need some advice from people who have had success and know what works, because I don't. Thanks in advance.

 

[Pilotas]

This will sound corny, but the only way you will be in any decent relationship is if you are yourself. Be honest and open with her.
Get her contact info from your friend and then call her up. Tell her you would have asked for her number right away but you're a bit shy to do it at the party. Women like confidence. If you say that confidently(I know that sounds ironic) you'll get some points. If you say it timidly, you'll loose some.
Good luck, don't mention your connection to terb until you're ready for a threesome!

 

[fantasiafan]

This will sound corny, but the only way you will be in any decent relationship is if you are yourself. Be honest and open with her.
Get her contact info from your friend and then call her up. Tell her you would have asked for her number right away but you're a bit shy to do it at the party. Women like confidence. If you say that confidently(I know that sounds ironic) you'll get some points. If you say it timidly, you'll loose some.
Good luck, don't mention your connection to terb until you're ready for a threesome!

Respectively disagree, just ask her for her number...its just a matter of playing it cool afterwards and not calling every few hours leaving messages

 

[radius]

This is coming a bit too late for you, but next time, if you don't feel that it is appropriate to ask someone for their contact info, why don't you give them yours?

I disagree slightly with Pilotas... If you think about it from her point of view, its slightly creepy that someone she only met once would call her up without previoiusly signalling any intention to do so and without her giving you her number.

If you do want to be active and not just wait until your next meeting (and BTW, you should probably do something well within a week of meeting her), then I would probably ask your friend to pass your number along to her.

Putting the ball in her court has the advantage that if she calls you up, you know she is at least a little interested. Its generally better to choose from the girls who are interested in you already rather than trying to chase down girls when you don't know whether they like you or not.

 

[RTRD]

I'd assmed this was a genuine request (the timing is interesting) and offer advice...

...except I'm not allowed to speak, lest I be viewed as a know it all and braggart.

Nah...I don't give a shit about the board moron's...here...I'll offer my two cents.

"I was introduced to this very pretty girl through a mutual friend at a party. She is single and seemed to like me. I did not ask her for her contact info because I didn't want to seem too desperate or aggressive. Was this the correct move?"

No. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with "Gee, I enjoyed talking to you...can I give you call sometime?" Worse she can say is "no"....which would be pretty cold, so fuck her...or "we'll...I'd feel beter if I'd call you", which is legit - I've known women who don't give their number to guys they do not know well but will call a guy a few times if they wanna give him a shot.

Note: Asking a woman if you can call her is not the same as asking her on date within hours of meeting her. THAT is "desperate" and "agressive".

"Now, what do I do now? I am afraid if I wait, she will be taken because she is so hot. Should I ask my friend for her email or phone number and contact her? Or should I wait until we meet next time (could be weeks) to ask her?"

Ask your friend to ask her if you can call her. It will show that you respect her privacy. Don't get him to give you the digits and call her direct - BAD MOVE. She will be like "who the fuck said you could call me", and you and your friend will be on her shit list.

Tell you friend to say EXACTLY this...

"Stinknuts really enjoyed chatting with you last Saturday, but he wanted to respect your privacy. Rather than just asking me for your number, he wanted me to ask you first if it will be ok"

If she says "Sure", then you are IN. You are already at third base...you have HER waiting for YOUR call...anticipating it. It is just as if she had VOLUNTEERED her number to you, cause she could have easily blown your friend off. But instead, she'll be impressed by your chivalry in an age were t-shirt wearing to restuarant XBOX playing 20 something guys think of and treat women as "just another one of the guys" right up until they insert their dicks...

However, even if she doesn't want to give up the digits...make sure your friend follows up with this...

"Well, he said he'd have no problem with the idea of you wanting to maintian your privacy unitl you got to know him better, so he asked me to make your I gave you his number. He said he'd be looking forward to your call"

From there...whatever happens happens. But...again, if your friend spins it right for you...it could still work out, as by proxy you've again shown your gentleman-like nature.

Note: This advice assumes we are talking about a WOMAN here, and not some 19 yo Paris Hilton wannabe "skank" whose idea of a man is someone who'd get her number from a friend like back in high school, show up at her door uninvited with a 6 pack...play her with her new gameboy / mp3 player / online poker game until bored, then ask for blow job as "foreplay" before fucking her doogie style, farting for laughs, then raiding the fridge, at which point she sighs to herself "boys", then smiles because she thinks such behavior is how a "real sexy guy" acts...

"What is the next step in this game? ...... ask my friend to ask her how she feels about me"

Do NOT do that. You aren't High School anymore....no need to "pass notes" because you are "shy", so you rather your friend do your dirty work for you.

You're a man now. A man presumably has enough self confidence along with enough experience with women that he can accept rejection and is willing to risk it. Again, do NOT fucking ask your friend to "ask how she feels about me". I cannot imagine anything likely to turn a woman off more.

You can find out yourself how she feels about you. What you want are the digits.

You have your next steps....go forth...

BTW...one more thing...do NOT make the mistake of thinking "this is 2006, I'll just send an email" because you and I BOTH know that would be a chicken shit cop out because you don't want to actually have a live conversation with her. And guess what? She will know it too....

Be man. Send your friend to get the digits, and if he comes up empty, guess what? There are 3 BILLION more women out there. Move on...

 

[Cinema Face]

In the early courtship phase, the guy has to initate everything. It's up to you to escalate the situation, ie: get the phone #, call her, set up a date, first kiss, sex, etc...

Don't expect the woman to do it. Also women love a guy who's very confident and assertive.

Check out this website. It'll change your life.

http://www.thedatingwizard.com/

 

[stinkynuts]

Thanks, guys for your advice.

MLAM, especially, I think your advice is really great! Thanks for answering all of my concerns. I guess you get a lot of chicks. lol. I have sent an email to my friend telling her to ask if it's ok to get her contact info. I'll let you know how it goes from there!

 

[fantasiafan]

Thanks, guys for your advice.

MLAM, especially, I think your advice is really great! Thanks for answering all of my concerns. I guess you get a lot of chicks. lol. I have sent an email to my friend telling her to ask if it's ok to get her contact info. I'll let you know how it goes from there!

MLAM gets no chicks.....poor guy is married and whipped......he lives vicariously through me.....

 

[fantasiafan]

Also, you might wanna wash your nuts stinky....women like that....

 

[scouser1]

on a side note the one way I have found better success at getting a gals contact info is to first ask her email address, half way as she is writing it down, ask for her number in a way similar to this, so is there a number I can reach you at? she says no she ends up sounding stupid because who in this day and age doesnt have a home phone or a cell phone.

 

[xix]

Read:
Dating for Dummies
Idiot's Guide to Complete Amazing Sex

Surf to:
a players web site.

 

[stinkynuts]

...

Tell you friend to say EXACTLY this...

"Stinknuts really enjoyed chatting with you last Saturday, but he wanted to respect your privacy. Rather than just asking me for your number, he wanted me to ask you first if it will be ok"

That may be the only part of your advice that may not work out.

 

[frankcastle]

My theoretical dating game is improving. I agreed with MLAM!

But my actual dating game is laughable.... the only reason I won't be a 40 year old virgin is thanks to hobbying.

 

[Eli]

Here yah go:

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/165312/mr_bean_elementary_dating/