Life...

[toughb]

"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
--Robin Williams

"My girlfriend always laughs during sex ---no matter what she's reading."
--Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women.
Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."
--Lynn Lavner

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
--Rodney Dangerfield

"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."
--Tom Clancy

 

[Homo Erectus]

Life is like a penis. When its soft you can't beat it. When its hard you get fucked.
Life is like a pubic hair on a toilet seat. Sometimes you get pissed off.