Joke of the day

[stevieray]

Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decide to amaze their men....that night all three will wear a leather bodice S&M style, stilettos and mask over their eyes.

After a few days they meet again....
The engaged girlfriend says: `The other night, when my boyfriend came home, he found me in the leather bodice, 4" stilettos and mask. He said `You are the woman of my life, I love you...then we made love all night."

The mistress stated: `Oh Yes! The other night we met in the office. I was wearing the leather bodice, mega stilettos, mask over my eyes and I opened the raincoat, he didn`t say a word. We just had wild sex all night.

The married one then said: `The other night I sent the kids to stay at my mothers for the night, I got myself ready, leather bodice, super stilettos and mask over my eyes. My husband came in from work, grabbed the remote and a beer, and said, `Hey Batman, what`s for dinner?`

 

[wowsitel]

I sits down next to this hot woman, and was checkin' my watch.

the girl asks me, are you waiting for someone?
I says, no i have a new watch, it can talk to me telepathically,
she says, whats it telling you?
I replied, its saying you’re not wearing any panties
she giggles and says: well its wrong, i am wearing panties,

So I tap the face of the watch and shake my wrist saying, damn thing must be an hour ahead










Eddie wanted desperately to have sex with this really cute, really hot

Girl in his office... But she was dating someone else.

One day Eddie got so frustrated that he went to her and said, "I'll

Give you $100 if you let me have sex with you..."The girl looked at

Him, and then said, "NO!"


Eddie said, "I'll be real fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you

Bend down and I'll finish by the time you've picked it up."

She thought for a moment and said that she would consult with her

Boyfriend... So she called him and explained the situation.

Her boyfriend says, "Ask him for $200, and pick up the money really

Fast. He won't even be able to get his pants down."

She agreed and accepts the proposal.

Over half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is still waiting for his

Girlfriend’s call. Finally, after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and
asks “What happened...?"

Still breathing hard, she managed to reply,

"The bastard had all quarters!"

 

[antlerman]

pennies work much better.......