The One Spa

Is a man still expected to pay for dinner?

lewd

Member
Aug 29, 2001
950
1
18
I'm speaking about civilian dates where both have agreed to get together for food and drinks.

On some online dates, I've paid, never to hear from her again (even though she said she'd love to get together again)
I've also gone dutch, because we both acknowledge it wasn't going anywhere.
Not surprisingly, the woman has never offered to pay the whole tab.
 

Perry Mason

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2001
4,682
208
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Here
Well, why don't you experiment and find out?

When you finish dinner just say to her, "I would really like to fuck you. Why don't you pay the bill and we'll go back to your place and I will make you scream?"

Let us know how it goes...

Perry
 

Ryan4life

Well-known member
Feb 11, 2011
610
463
63
Dont go for dinner dates with online dates at least until you have gone on a few dates. There are many flaky women with online dating as they get hundreds of messages. There are also a lot online who are just looking for a free meal. Just stick to coffee or a drink.
 

Occasionally

Active member
May 22, 2011
2,928
7
38
Man is still expected to pay.

At work, a group of us will discuss things for fun and when it comes to dating and such, every women still skews to the "man should pay" model. Some of them will proudly bring up something like.... "Ya, but I paid for one of the meals", as if paying for one meal out of five with someone they've been seeing for a while is some kind of achievement.

I've been on various dates as well and have paid every time. Some will go through the motion of bring out her wallet, but as soon as I say I'll pay it, they quickly put it back.

It's just one of those things (even in the year 2016), which the guy just has to man-up and accept.
 

out4fun

Active member
Jan 8, 2008
974
43
28
Ya, pay up. I'm late 40's and can't recall a woman ever buying me dinner. I've eaten out probably 40 times in the past year and have yet to see a lady reach for the tab. I guess they have shorter arms.
 

Ref

Committee Member
Oct 29, 2002
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I'm speaking about civilian dates where both have agreed to get together for food and drinks.
Would it make a difference if you asked a guy out on a date?

It is the person who invites the other person that has the responsibility to pay the bill, unless the other person insists on sharing.
 
Last edited:

John Henry

Active member
Apr 10, 2011
1,298
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This is 2016 guy's . Women are supposed to be equal are they not . I've been on quite a few dates in my time and I've always paid . Even if I dated a girl for a few months it was me paying . Never once did any woman offer to pay . Even at the drive-thru ( coffee ) I had to pay . Trying to reach into my pockets and find some money while they just sat there . Like really are you that cheap ladies ??? Don't hand me this crap that women get paid more than men . Some of these ladies made a lot more than me and I still paid .

Women are always crying that want to be equal to men . Really , when it comes to divorce court and kids are involved it's the women who always have the upper hand . Saw a write up about a fellow that got beaten by his wife a few times . He called the cops . Cops didn't believe him and they shrugged it off . He said to one cop what if it was her calling the cops . Cops answer , then you would be arrested and taken to jail . So much for being equal. Eventually she was arrested and was charged but it took awhile .

How many times have we heard SP's saying that guys are cheap because they want to haggle the price . Get lost cheap skate . Really . when it comes to women not dolling out the dollars it's OK but if your a guy , oh you must pay because I'm doing you a favor by going out with you.. LOL

Maybe that's why I don't date any more . You wish to go out with me honey then we split the bill. Other wise then take a hike . Same goes for a weekend get away or holiday . Let's go some place nice where we can relax and enjoy ourselves . Sure honey , no problem . Just let me know when you have saved enough money for your share of the trip . This is with girls that I've dated for at least 6 months . You should see their faces when I give them that line LOL.

I have no problem in paying for a date at times but at least ladies show the guy that you care and spend some of your own hard earned money on the guy . You will get back 10X by doing so.
 

ken0ken

Member
Jun 23, 2012
45
16
8
I read this entire thread. And hopefully I can add something productive to the convo . I'm 25 and I I often have women offer to take me out not just to dinners...but to vacation and concerts.

Here is my prespective. Be generous, give positive energy, give generously, always make it a win-win situation. So, honestly I often offer to pay just on auto-pilot. People see this quality and then want to give me stuff, because they see in me qualities that inform generosity and kindness.

By thinking " should I pay or not, you bring in a selfish energy that turns people off. They don't wanna offer any value or give anything.

Try a positive and generous energy. I think you will find peiple totally opening up to you and giving you value.
 

Ridgeman08

50 Shades of AJ
Nov 28, 2008
4,495
2
38
I'm an old school gentlemanly type, so I am always prepared to pony up when the bill comes. I have on occasion been treated as well, when a lady insists, and I'm ok with that too.

Chivalry trumps equality...
 

bazokajoe

Well-known member
Nov 6, 2010
9,934
8,098
113
This is 2016 guy's . Women are supposed to be equal are they not . I've been on quite a few dates in my time and I've always paid . Even if I dated a girl for a few months it was me paying . Never once did any woman offer to pay . Even at the drive-thru ( coffee ) I had to pay . Trying to reach into my pockets and find some money while they just sat there . Like really are you that cheap ladies ??? Don't hand me this crap that women get paid more than men . Some of these ladies made a lot more than me and I still paid .

Women are always crying that want to be equal to men . Really , when it comes to divorce court and kids are involved it's the women who always have the upper hand . Saw a write up about a fellow that got beaten by his wife a few times . He called the cops . Cops didn't believe him and they shrugged it off . He said to one cop what if it was her calling the cops . Cops answer , then you would be arrested and taken to jail . So much for being equal. Eventually she was arrested and was charged but it took awhile .

How many times have we heard SP's saying that guys are cheap because they want to haggle the price . Get lost cheap skate . Really . when it comes to women not dolling out the dollars it's OK but if your a guy , oh you must pay because I'm doing you a favor by going out with you.. LOL

Maybe that's why I don't date any more . You wish to go out with me honey then we split the bill. Other wise then take a hike . Same goes for a weekend get away or holiday . Let's go some place nice where we can relax and enjoy ourselves . Sure honey , no problem . Just let me know when you have saved enough money for your share of the trip . This is with girls that I've dated for at least 6 months . You should see their faces when I give them that line LOL.

I have no problem in paying for a date at times but at least ladies show the guy that you care and spend some of your own hard earned money on the guy . You will get back 10X by doing so.
Geez John,you think the same way I do. Your comment was well said and spot on.

Here is a question,who pays when 2 gay people go out on a date?
 

bigshot

Active member
Aug 16, 2003
1,362
20
38
I think it is good to remember that women spend a ton of money on looking good for dates :) And civilians still live in a world where women make less than men...
That's pretty funny. Here we have a woman who charges $400.00 for each and every hour of her time, espousing how women make less than men. It's 2016, honey!
 

SoftHands813

Casual Observer
Jan 2, 2008
743
272
63
I always reach for the cheque first, as it is the gentlemanly thing to do. I have dated several women who appreciate the gesture but still insist it's their turn, and so I oblige them.

One must be careful not to cross the line from chivalry to patronage.
 

canada-man

Well-known member
Jun 16, 2007
31,969
2,893
113
Toronto, Ontario
canadianmale.wordpress.com
I think it is good to remember that women spend a ton of money on looking good for dates :) And civilians still live in a world where women make less than men...
the gender gap is a myth no economists takes it seriously and men earn more because women work less hours and tend to choose jobs and careers that pay less.
 

Keebler Elf

The Original Elf
Aug 31, 2001
14,621
240
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The Keebler Factory
To answer the OP's original question, if it's a "date", then YES, you are expected to pay. If it's become platonic, especially if it's on a regular basis, then I'd say it's alright to split the bill. But if you're a real man you're paying. And if she's not putting out, you stop going to dinner with her. That's the way the social etiquette works.

If the REAL question is meant to be "Why should I be expected to pay when women are all uppity about equal rights these days?" then that says more about your attitude than hers.

In short, BE A MAN.
 

thesun

New member
Jan 20, 2011
557
2
0
I think it is good to remember that women spend a ton of money on looking good for dates :) And civilians still live in a world where women make less than men...
I respectfully disagree with this because that is not true. I also find it silly women calling some men as cheapies when they should be looking at their own mirrors. Don't get me wrong; Some men are cheap but so do some women too. However Kenoken has a point. Just be yourself. Be generous only because you want to and people will see this through you. If you are a cheapie, people will see this as well if you are a woman or man.

Be a man or be this or that, does it really matter? Your personality speaks for yourself. It is up to them if they want to be with you or not.

Meanwhile, the reality is many men whether they like it or not, often highlight the point of always paying off the bills. I wonder if some women ever get to the point and say to themselves, this has to change. Believe me I have heard men saying, be a man. It is my job. It s the right thing to do. Yet they think about this. They talk about this often. Don't we ever want to end this discussion? It will only end if both genders confront and deal with it. Yet, expectations remain.....
 

Ridgeman08

50 Shades of AJ
Nov 28, 2008
4,495
2
38
I think it is good to remember that women spend a ton of money on looking good for dates :) And civilians still live in a world where women make less than men...
That's pretty funny. Here we have a woman who charges $400.00 for each and every hour of her time, espousing how women make less than men. It's 2016, honey!
 
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