How do you handle women in the work place (The ones who bait)

[Big Daddy]

If you are single in a workplace, there is always a woman who will "play games" with you. All she wants is to make you ask her out (she will flirt with you and say that she is looking for a boyfriend) and when you ask her out she will reply "I am dating someone". After that you are totally screwed. She will tell everyone in the office and then the cat and mouse game begins. Usually there is no winning in these games.

My question to everyone is how do you handle these games and better yet, avoid them in the first place? Also, how common is this game? Did anyone else ran into such games?

 

[moneyshotz]

Simple........... I don't ask anyone out from my work place.
As they say, too much to lose to little to gain..

 

[drlove]

Easy...

Make HER ask YOU.

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: Easy...

Make HER ask YOU.

That is where the cat and mouse game begins...

 

[pblues]

Re: Re: Easy...

That is where the cat and mouse game begins...

Often the chase is better than the catch. Best advice, play nice & avoid office romances.

 

[Mack Bolan]

I've seen people get fired over this topic.
A lot of companies have unwritten rules against staff members dating. It can cause a lot of problems.

 

[drlove]

Re: Re: Easy...

That is where the cat and mouse game begins...

Actually, that's not true. By having her be the one to ask, you're avoiding the game all together, or more to the point - you're sending her a clear message that you're the one in control; not the other way around.

 

[Paladin]

Simple Rules to Follow

I have four simple rules to follow with respect to flirting or considering dating someone who works for or with me:

Rule #1: Maintain at least 6 feet distance between you and anyone you would consider dating.

Rule #2: Never engage in any conversation with someone you would consider dating without a third party present.

Rule #3: Never enter into a situation where you have to be alone with anyone you would consider dating.

Rule #4: Note the consequences to your career and the potential for legal action against you should you consider flirting or dating someone within your workplace.

 

[Big Daddy]

Sometimes it gets complicated

Thanks Paladin and Dr. Love. Given the bad economy, sometimes people get bitchy. It is important to clarify that I am not in any such situation, but I have seen 2 girls will play a guy to get him in trouble. One will support the other girl. Usually, there is a age difference between women (one might be 44 and other might be 24). The 44 year old might come and tell you things about 24 (eg. The 24 year old is looking for a relationship etc.) and 24 year old will flirt with the guy. The guy usually is a successful guy and the two women play the game (perhaps to get him fired).

It is funny because I have seen that women don't know the consequences it has on a man's career. For them it is just having fun in the office. The issue is very serious and I think that women and men perceive office games differently. The result is usually bad for the guy.

I think women do this to relieve stress in the work place and when a guy considers this seriously he gets fucked.

I can't blame women. It is just that shit happens! So beware!

BTW Paladin, you have recommended some very good rules.

 

[Paladin]

Lasst Resort

I have one final rule to be used as the last resort when all else fails:

Rule #5: Terminate with extreme prejudice.

 

[Iwantdfk]

Just be upfront.

When it comes to flirting, I at some point in the conversation acknowlege that she is flirting with me and I tell her that if she wants to get with me here is my number and if she doesn't want me then I suggest to her that its not a good idea to flirt with someone she doesn't want.

I make sure I always get to the point when it comes to girls. They know what they want and if you put them on the spot you force them to make a choice. Yes or no.

If you say it in the right way you will end the flirting games and get on with the real game.

thats my 2cents

 

[Big Daddy]

Jealousy is mother of all the screw ups.

You are right Paladin. Jealousy and revenge with Women is mother of all screw ups for men. You have to loose to the women to keep the job. In other words, think with the right head

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: Just be upfront.

When it comes to flirting, I at some point in the conversation acknowlege that she is flirting with me and I tell her that if she wants to get with me here is my number and if she doesn't want me then I suggest to her that its not a good idea to flirt with someone she doesn't want.

I make sure I always get to the point when it comes to girls. They know what they want and if you put them on the spot you force them to make a choice. Yes or no.

If you say it in the right way you will end the flirting games and get on with the real game.

thats my 2cents

I have done that before, it did not work well. As soon as you say something like that she knows that you are interested. That is when she will start flirting with your male collague. And you might be tempted to flirt with other females. These things happen over time (something like 4-6 months), so it is hard to stay strong all the time. Usually, it ends up messing the office environment. Even though no one gets fired and goes out with anyone, the office environment gets tense.

BTW girls in office never know two words "Yes" or "No". The only word they know is "may be" or "I don't know you well enough".

 

[Thunderballs]

If you cannot follow the rule of "Do not dip your pen in the company ink" then I would suggest the following to help things along:

1. Women love affirmation. A comment like "nice work" followed by a firm pat on the ass shows your acknowledgement for her skills in a supportive sort of way.
2. You may demonstrate your helpful side by offering to photocopy her ass for her. Sometimes the button is just a little too far away to be convenient while sitting on the machine. An extra set of hands may be just what she needs.
3. Show that you notice her. Comments like "hey sexy" or "nice rack" will usually bring a smile to her face and brighten her day.
4. The offering of a friendly game of naked twister in your office at lunchtime could be just the stress release that she needs. It also shows your playful side.
5. If you are her secret Santa during the holiday season, a gift of lingerie will go a long way. Suggest that she model it for the entire office at the coffee break.
6. A "Good Morning Kiss n' Grope" is a great eye opener and would likely be more appreciated than her morning coffee.

I hope that these suggestions help to keep you out of trouble.

 

[drlove]

If you cannot follow the rule of "Do not dip your pen in the company ink" then I would suggest the following to help things along:

1. Women love affirmation. A comment like "nice work" followed by a firm pat on the ass shows your acknowledgement for her skills in a supportive sort of way.
2. You may demonstrate your helpful side by offering to photocopy her ass for her. Sometimes the button is just a little too far away to be convenient while sitting on the machine. An extra set of hands may be just what she needs.
3. Show that you notice her. Comments like "hey sexy" or "nice rack" will usually bring a smile to her face and brighten her day.
4. The offering of a friendly game of naked twister in your office at lunchtime could be just the stress release that she needs. It also shows your playful side.
5. If you are her secret Santa during the holiday season, a gift of lingerie will go a long way. Suggest that she model it for the entire office at the coffee break.
6. A "Good Morning Kiss n' Grope" is a great eye opener and would likely be more appreciated than her morning coffee.

I hope that these suggestions help to keep you out of trouble.

They work for me! LMAO!!

 

[Big Daddy]

That is a way to early retirement

TB,

Your rules are very funny. It seems that dipping your pen in company's ink is a sure way for early retirement in the bad economy. LOL.

 

[The Baron]

Tell her to go F#$f her self and go get a sp for an hour much more fun and a lot less head aches. I hate games.

Baron

 

[einar]

The world of flirtation is everywhere among adults, including the workplace. It's energizing and wonderful. It can also be troubling. There are no societal rules, despite the world of sexual harassment tribunals. I'd say don't hurt anyone, but have fun.

Einar

 

[zoickss]

You could also let a rumour get to her or find a way to make her think that you are Gay - when she starts talking about it make her look like an ass - and get her canned for defamation of character. Since she likes playing these games of get the guy canned - it would be an appropriate twist on things.

Can anyone tell I've had a bad week? LOL

 

[Sixer]

Don’t mix your work with your relationship. I have seen a senior manager got dismissed for making explicit verbal sexual harassment to a female colleague. She replaced his position shortly after. I wasn’t in the company long enough to figure out whether this was a conspiracy or not. Not all women are alike. I have the pleasure working with many fine female co-workers. But there are always some very ambitious employees (male/female). They will remove any obstacles that stand in their path of moving up on the corporate ladder.