Toronto Passions

Hazing and hostility

Oral-Bee

New member
Jul 17, 2025
7
10
3
Hey everyone,

I recently joined this forum, hoping to connect with others who share a common interest. However, I've been a bit taken aback by some of the interactions I've seen and experienced.

It feels like there's a pretty unwelcoming atmosphere here, with a fair amount of hostility and what feels like hazing towards newer members. I'm genuinely curious why that is. Is there a reason for this kind of environment? I thought the purpose of a forum like this was to foster discussion and community around our shared interests, not to make people feel unwelcome.

I'm interested to hear from both new and long-standing members about their perspectives on this. What are your thoughts on the current community atmosphere, and do you think it reflects the kind of place we want this forum to be?

Thanks for your honest responses.
 

Nickelodeon

Well-known member
Apr 13, 2003
2,051
540
113
65
toronto
I've been a member since 2003, and there has been a definite decline in the social friendliness, but it's nothing like X, FB etc. where old people reminisce about the old days, versus the "bro" culture of today.

I suggest you stick around, and you'll find some very helpful and friendly members....especially in the review sections.
 

Ωhm

Member
Jun 29, 2023
99
33
18
Hey everyone,

I recently joined this forum, hoping to connect with others who share a common interest. However, I've been a bit taken aback by some of the interactions I've seen and experienced.

It feels like there's a pretty unwelcoming atmosphere here, with a fair amount of hostility and what feels like hazing towards newer members. I'm genuinely curious why that is. Is there a reason for this kind of environment? I thought the purpose of a forum like this was to foster discussion and community around our shared interests, not to make people feel unwelcome.

I'm interested to hear from both new and long-standing members about their perspectives on this. What are your thoughts on the current community atmosphere, and do you think it reflects the kind of place we want this forum to be?

Thanks for your honest responses.
Also, love the name you choose lol
 
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bazokajoe

Well-known member
Nov 6, 2010
11,102
10,037
113
I wouldn't call it unwelcoming.
When someone posts an over the top review of a lady on the first day they regisiter it's taken with a huge load of salt. Especially if it's a LL lady. Maybe it's a legit review but most likely it's a paid review(customer getting discount for good review) or the lady herself looking to drum up business.

I'll agree a lot of threads go off the subject pretty quick.
The political threads are the worst for that.
 

Ωhm

Member
Jun 29, 2023
99
33
18
I wouldn't call it unwelcoming.
When someone posts an over the top review of a lady on the first day they regisiter it's taken with a huge load of salt. Especially if it's a LL lady. Maybe it's a legit review but most likely it's a paid review(customer getting discount for good review) or the lady herself looking to drum up business.

I'll agree a lot of threads go off the subject pretty quick.
The political threads are the worst for that.
Where could one find an opportunity for a paid review :devilish:
 
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Robert Mugabe

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2017
10,452
7,625
113
Hey everyone,

I recently joined this forum, hoping to connect with others who share a common interest. However, I've been a bit taken aback by some of the interactions I've seen and experienced.

It feels like there's a pretty unwelcoming atmosphere here, with a fair amount of hostility and what feels like hazing towards newer members. I'm genuinely curious why that is. Is there a reason for this kind of environment? I thought the purpose of a forum like this was to foster discussion and community around our shared interests, not to make people feel unwelcome.

I'm interested to hear from both new and long-standing members about their perspectives on this. What are your thoughts on the current community atmosphere, and do you think it reflects the kind of place we want this forum to be?

Thanks for your honest responses.
Welcome.
 
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thumper18474

Well-known member
It's a right of passage to be hazed when a newbie..don't take it personally..what alot of us senior members get crusty about is the laziness of some members new and seasoned when it comes to info.
Members with 5..10..15 yrs or more on this board who continually take..take.take information gleaned from others who have TOFTT...and have NEVER contributed themselves..
Newbies asking for info without doing even the slightest amount of due diligence..like
THE FUCKING SEARCH FUNCTION!!!!

If you're interested in a lady....put in the work first!
IF you come up dry..THEN ask!
There is the odd SP who will join act like a hobbyist and ask about a certain lady(herself) just to attract interest for herself!
That will always get our Spidey senses tingling
As previously mentioned the 1st over the top post from a newbie describing his life changing encounter with a previously unknown SP...
These are just a few ...there's plenty more...
Good Luck and happy hobbying

T.
 

NoPicturesPlz

#1 respecter of women
Jan 31, 2025
3
9
3
I agree with your general assessment as someone that is relatively new to the forum. I lurked for a bit before saying anything because of this.

from what I gather about most of the elder accounts that come off hostile is because they had their full of shills, white knights, people that don’t do their own research and users that always ask but never contribute anything meaningful.

I do wish there were more people that were open to joke around and not be so serious/sensitive in this community. I think it would make this place feel more welcoming. We’re here to have a good time after all.
 
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thumper18474

Well-known member
I agree with your general assessment as someone that is relatively new to the forum. I lurked for a bit before saying anything because of this.

from what I gather about most of the elder accounts that come off hostile is because they had their full of shills, white knights, people that don’t do their own research and users that always ask but never contribute anything meaningful.

I do wish there were more people that were open to joke around and not be so serious/sensitive in this community. I think it would make this place feel more welcoming. We’re here to have a good time after all.
For the most part..the majority of us here are a fun-loving bunch of horny guys
Yes there are a few who think they're God's gift to hobbyists and feel they are so skilled and shit don't stink types but you learn to just ignore them...they're legends in their own minds..
We joke around alot we even have joke threads!
If you want the lighthearted side of terb...stay away from the politics thread!
Keep a stiff upper lip...we actually are a fun bunch when you get to know us
 

Ahri

Your Asian Escape
Supporting Member
Apr 21, 2021
725
1,636
93
Maybe since I am a provider I got a totally different experience here, when I first got on here everyone seemed friendly and helpful lol 😀

Also I feel like a lot of people get mad they don’t use the search feature more often 🤷‍♀️
 

Forzafonz

NotTheCatThatYouLike :)
Jun 27, 2019
378
584
93
Maybe since I am a provider I got a totally different experience here, when I first got on here everyone seemed friendly and helpful lol 😀

Also I feel like a lot of people get mad they don’t use the search feature more often 🤷‍♀️
It just you have great personaliTities and compAssion and Assertivness and SelflAssness and a tight pussy 😘
 
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Jenesis

Fabulously Full Figured
Supporting Member
Jul 14, 2020
10,287
10,983
113
North Whitby Incalls
www.jenesis.ch
Since many others have answered your question - I’m curious why you joined if you feel unwelcome, and why this would be your first coming out post?

Something had to compel you to still join regardless of your feelings expressed. Was there some form of positivity shown somewhere that made you willing to take the chance? I wonder because I know some who have done the opposite and just decided to stay away from joining or posting at all.

I'm also wondering if you can point out some examples of what you are specifically talking about. As someone already said, the political forum is not a friendly place so is that where you saw most of the hostility? Or are you speaking about new guys who have written reviews or guys doing ISOs. Some more context may be helpful. Maybe we can help you navigate it better to get better results and help you feel more welcomed
 
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Ωhm

Member
Jun 29, 2023
99
33
18
Maybe since I am a provider I got a totally different experience here, when I first got on here everyone seemed friendly and helpful lol 😀

Also I feel like a lot of people get mad they don’t use the search feature more often 🤷‍♀️
I wonder if they will be a client or provider considering the name 😆
 

Oral-Bee

New member
Jul 17, 2025
7
10
3
Since many others have answered your question - I’m curious why you joined if you feel unwelcome, and why this would be your first coming out post?

Something had to compel you to still join regardless of your feelings expressed. Was there some form of positivity shown somewhere that made you willing to take the chance? I wonder because I know some who have done the opposite and just decided to stay away from joining or posting at all.

I'm also wondering if you can point out some examples of what you are specifically talking about. As someone already said, the political forum is not a friendly place so is that where you saw most of the hostility? Or are you speaking about new guys who have written reviews or guys doing ISOs. Some more context may be helpful. Maybe we can help you navigate it better to get better results and help you feel more welcomed
I'm not following your logic. Usually people join a club, website, forum, then find out all the pros and cons. This isn't my first post, but I deleted my previous post because I was called a troll for no apparent reason, thus feeling hostility. Some felt the need to highlight the fact that I am a new member and whatever I posted was somehow insignificant. I understand that most social websites and forums are full of opinionated people who know everything, and people love to poke and test you, but very seldom are they hostile for no apparent reason.
 

LTO_3

Well-known member
Aug 27, 2004
1,361
1,122
113
Niagara Region
Welcome to being a newbie...kind of a right of passage on TERB. And depending on what you post and how, you'll be called out very quickly and sometimes not politely. So you either have to get thick(er) skin, leave or don't post/contribute. Hopefully you'll just get thicker skin and learn to give as good as you get.

LTO_3
 
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Jenesis

Fabulously Full Figured
Supporting Member
Jul 14, 2020
10,287
10,983
113
North Whitby Incalls
www.jenesis.ch
I'm not following your logic. Usually people join a club, website, forum, then find out all the pros and cons. This isn't my first post, but I deleted my previous post because I was called a troll for no apparent reason, thus feeling hostility. Some felt the need to highlight the fact that I am a new member and whatever I posted was somehow insignificant. I understand that most social websites and forums are full of opinionated people who know everything, and people love to poke and test you, but very seldom are they hostile for no apparent reason.
Now I am confused. You joined Thursday and made a post and someone randomly called you a troll? What was this thread about? Again, more context may be of assistance.

I thought this was your first post because that is what your posting history said. Because of that, it seemed more likely that you were a lurker for a while and then just joined Thursday and made this first post. If you deleted previous posts, they would not show on your posting history. Hope that helps explain.

But again, more context is needed as to why were called a troll. As you can see from the reasons provided, there are some things that most older TERB members may be known for but calling someone a troll for one post is not usually one of them. TERB can be a harsh place but being called a troll with only one post is certainly not the norm around here.
 
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dubbleyou

Member
Oct 4, 2024
49
89
18
There will always be bad apples no matter where you go, whether it be online forums, online communities, in-person events.

You just gotta ignore the bad apples, otherwise you're stressing and giving yourself anxiety over silliness you cannot control.

Also, that response/attention is exactly what those kind of people are trying to draw out of the good people anyway, so in a sense, you're letting them win when you react.
 

massman

Well-known member
Sep 8, 2001
5,023
3,940
113
It's a right of passage to be hazed when a newbie..don't take it personally..what alot of us senior members get crusty about is the laziness of some members new and seasoned when it comes to info.
Members with 5..10..15 yrs or more on this board who continually take..take.take information gleaned from others who have TOFTT...and have NEVER contributed themselves..
Newbies asking for info without doing even the slightest amount of due diligence..like
THE FUCKING SEARCH FUNCTION!!!!

If you're interested in a lady....put in the work first!
IF you come up dry..THEN ask!
There is the odd SP who will join act like a hobbyist and ask about a certain lady(herself) just to attract interest for herself!
That will always get our Spidey senses tingling
As previously mentioned the 1st over the top post from a newbie describing his life changing encounter with a previously unknown SP...
These are just a few ...there's plenty more...
Good Luck and happy hobbying

T.
This.
New members do need to earn a bit of cred so to speak, but otherwise newbies are more than welcome here. Just remember that board members are not your own personal Google (or other search engine) entry clerks.
 
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