About Dating Websites.. and some questions

[lucifer]

Hi everyone,

Have been recently reading some posts about lavalife, yahoo personals etc. They seem to suggest that "meeting" women online is easy.

I used to use online personals a lot.. when they were free [in the good old days of 1998-2001]. My experience has been that getting e-mails or even phone conversations with women is relatively easy.

However I have noticed that women who you meet online are

1] Fat and well not good looking, to put it very mildly.
2] Think they are gods gift to men.. and these are the ugly ones. The good looking ones in my opinion do this mostly to get attention and feel good about themselves and have no serious
intentions.
3] Of course the fact that I am not white, black or very well off does not really help this at all. Nor does the fact that I really do not give a s**t about head games.

My questions are

1] Are pay sites any better.. qualitywise [of women].
2] Is my experience common?
3] While the adage about some s**t sticking if you throw enough is true... is it worth it. I mean is the psychological effort worth it.

Note- I have never met people in toronto or other really big cities [pop > 1 million] where you might actually find some intresting people.. so you guys might have somewhat different experiences.

Feel free to comment as this thread would serve its purpose best if many people replied.. not just the 'usual suspects'..*S*

 

[spartan5782]

Finding Love?

Lucifer,

You admit yourself that meeting women online through the personal groups is easy...and it is. But then you throw in certain criteria of your date...SHAME ON YOU!! No, I'm sure your experiences are not uncommon..at least they match my own.

If you want a good looking date with no hassles, that's why we are here...but it costs and it's temporary. Longer lasting relationships take work...lots of work.

First, finding a woman that you are interested in...now she's got to be interested in you...a miracle. Second, no psycological problems on either side..good fu**in luck! Third, no financial drain (you said you weren't rollin in it? The Hobby may be cheaper!). Take into account possibly kids, other family members you may learn to hate, bad habits..etc. It's a tall order and lots of concessions on both sides as well as a ton of luck in finding that "right" person.

Advice? For what it's worth, mine is to recognize your shortcomings and maybe #1 on your list becomes less of an issue. BTW, mostly everyone is looking to trade up.., as you are. So, permanent is only "as long as it lasts". Cold reality. Even someone who is, in your terms, not up to your standards but you've "settled" on, may surprise you by trading up from you..isn't that a kick?

Good luck...enjoy the Hobby!
Sparty

 

[BigGuy26]

Online

I would say that most of the women who look online have a fantasy in their head.........they believe that Brad Pitt will be waiting to connect with them, so they will not settle for an average looking guy. It's because the women can choose who by how the guy looks, how much money and what profession, and by searching based on that criteria they feel this is actually attainable.

I would guess that a whole lot of women, even the fat ugly ones, believe they will meet a Brad Pitt and he will fall hopelessly in love with her. What these women need is reality.

Men on the other hand use online personals to look for sex, probably about 85% of the time.

 

[thecoolguyms72]

Well, one of my experiences has been the subject of another thread, so you will see some serious commonalities there. I have found that using ICQ or some Instant Message system has been as good or better than dating services. You can talk to them so you can eliminate the dummies, usually get a description, and when a woman doesn't or won't tell you their weight, you know the situation. And, you can usually get a picture. Just be careful of the bait and switch. Just don't make the mistake I did of having them come to your place for the first meeting, that's what they have Tim Horton's for.

I find that most of the online dating services are filled with old and obsolete ads and people who are either disillusioned about their looks or stature. That's why I stick to ICQ or something like that.

 

[Joker]

I wish there was a way to bring some of these chicks into reality. I told one after she said she didn't think we were compatible, "I know I'm not Tom Cruise, but you're no Cindy Crawford." If anyone has a more polite way of saying that I'll write it down.

 

[thecoolguyms72]

I say, " I know I'm not Brad Pitt, but you're no Jennifer Anniston." Try that one and see how it works.