How do you manage emotions?

I don’t really agree.

A sugar setup might give the illusion of more connection, but it doesn’t change the nature of the dynamic. At the end of the day, it’s still transactional. More time together or more texting doesn’t suddenly make it genuine or healthy.

The issue isn’t access or frequency. It’s authenticity.

You can have great moments, sure. But there’s always that underlying layer you can’t fully ignore.

And just because part of you wants more doesn’t mean feeding it is actually good for you.

Sundercover said:

Sometimes I find myself on a rollercoaster... immensely excited before, awesome time during, but a feeling of loss and longing after... When I am with a girl I really connect with then it can feel quite painful for a day or two after I see her, or even everytime I think about her, until I make plans to book again. I can tell that a part of me wants more, wants to be more for her, despite knowing that that's exactly not what it can become and that it takes away from fully living in the bliss of what I DID have.

On the other hand, if my expectations aren't quite met I sometimes have a tough time to hold on to what was good rather than starting to regret even going there... like focusing on what service wasn't delivered, etc.

Does that sound familiar to anyone? How do you deal with these feelings after the meeting? Especially that euphoria turning to a feeling of "loss"?
I'm curious and feeling a bit reflective today lol

Click to expand...

It's obvious that this ''hobby'' we all have here is having it's pros and cons. Let me share my experience - maybe it helps.

For me the + are that it helps me to to keep the focus on my original relationship and make them stable without looking at other women in real life and having this as a rare indulgence to walk out my dark side, fulfill fantasies and then get back to the normal life and CONCENTRATE on it.

It's like once in a while experience and then it definitely helps and doesn't become the thing you start to think about too often. Easy sexual experience for $200 is not meant to make you fall in love - it's release, experience, one-night stand and simply for me it clear my brain from that dark thoughts. I used to watch porn, follow accounts of the hot girls being in very long relationship I praise a lot and MA became my option to explore, but in a different way - not looking at the all girls I see and thinking that I'd like to fuck them, but to know that if I truly need this - I will go and get this as a service and then to concentrate on what really matters. And it helped, but you need to take control as it easliy could become an addiction. I met Peach from Hush last week and what a woman - for some people it would be dangerous even to get experience with her as it's easy to start want more, so I don't recommend visiting one provider too often.

It should help your mental health not vice versa. If it is causing problems -then you need to think if you're doing the right things for you. For me I explain this to myself as I have my main restaurant I love, but sometimes I need to eat outside to keep my main restaurant my favorite place.

I made a mistake getting emotional attached with Skye @ Luxe. I really enjoyed our session and we were supposed to get together Friday for dinner and try her BDSM. I am not going to talk about what happened as it is a personal thing and frankly I am still confused by the whole time we were together and how it ended. Just do not get attached to the companions because it is a business for them and some may try to manipulate you and take advantage of you. That is all I am going to say.

pdell said:

I made a mistake getting emotional attached with Skye @ Luxe. I really enjoyed our session and we were supposed to get together Friday for dinner and try her BDSM. I am not going to talk about what happened as it is a personal thing and frankly I am still confused by the whole time we were together and how it ended. Just do not get attached to the companions because it is a business for them and some may try to manipulate you and take advantage of you. That is all I am going to say.

Click to expand...

the words of experience here... and I think we have all been down that road... lessons are learned...

we all learn more from the mistakes....

I manage by not having emotions! If you get attached that easy then I think a gf is for you over an escort! Always remember that they value your money and not you but they put on a good front because they know a lot of guys are suckers when it comes to handing out the cash

Honestly, the first paragraph of this response suffered badly, but the second was perfect....in my opinion the majority of the ladies you might meet are exceptional people, please love them as who they are and enjoy the incredible enjoyment they provide...

sailorsam said:

Honestly, the first paragraph of this response suffered badly, but the second was perfect....in my opinion the majority of the ladies you might meet are exceptional people, please love them as who they are and enjoy the incredible enjoyment they provide...

Click to expand...

Sorry, i was referring to Nadia's response...who i respect

Highly sensitive people or Empaths
OCD
And other words I can use but ... people may take it the wrong way.

TRANSACTIONAL:
FWB, NSA, Sugar **** ; One night/day stand, SW, MP, Strip club, Model, Acting, entertainment industry / field, Bribery ( sex for promotion at work), Dating Apps; Social Media.
Anyone in the above mentioned cannot be saved.

What is meant by transactional?

of or relating to the process of conducting business. A leading authority on ethical issues in commercial practice, she has designed classes and materials to teach students transactional skills. of or relating to personal or social interaction characterized by mutual influence and exchange.

AI search result:

A transactional relationship is a connection based on a "give-and-take" exchange, where interactions are motivated by what each person can get in return, similar to a business deal rather than a purely emotional bond. It focuses on quid pro quo, where value—such as money, services, or status—is exchanged.

Key Characteristics and Signs

• Conditional Support: Help is provided only if a return is expected or guaranteed.
• Scorekeeping: A strong focus on keeping things "even" or tracking who owes what.
• Lack of Emotional Intimacy: Relationships may feel robotic, lacking empathy, passion, or deep, non-monetary commitment
  .
• • Self-Serving Utility: Individuals feel valued only for their usefulness rather than their inherent personality.
  • Frequent Negotiation: Partners behave as negotiators trying to maximize their own gain, often with unspoken "hidden contracts".
    Reddit +5

Contexts and Impact

• Healthy Usage: In professional settings, professional mentorships, or certain partnerships, this is effective and efficient, says Gather & Grow OC.
• Unhealthy Dynamics: In romantic or personal relationships, this can cause feelings of loneliness, manipulation, and exploitation, notes YouTube video.
• Difference from Reciprocity: Unlike healthy relationships that share, support, and trust, transactional ones fail when the benefits stop, explains YouTube video.
  YouTube +4

Shifting to a Healthier Dynamic
Shifting away from a transactional model requires cultivating emotional safety, practicing vulnerability without immediate expectation of return, and recognizing when to say "no".
TherapyDen

------------

How I fixed my self? I went in with a goal not to Validate my EGO.
all 12 steps program ( Emotions Anon)
Grief support group - 8 - 10 weeks session every 3 years.
Yoga / tai chi - 8 - 10 weeks session every 3 years.
Weekend workshops.

NadiaLovechanko said:

I think maybe a sugar baby relationship might be a bit better suited for you than just "quick dates"
As you will be able to have more moments with the woman of your choosing as well as being able to hear from her during the month as well

I think the important thing is finding someone you can connect with outside of the bedroom just as well as inside, true friendships can develop & that just makes this a whole lot more fun

Click to expand...

Terrible advice

Im going to guess that there is some childhood trauma here.
Pick up the book "Its not your fault" by Alex Howard.

I am donating a box of tampons and unlimited hugs to everyone who contributed to this thread

I've been hobbying since 2016 and share:

- When I started, I had recenntly separated and was on the 'hunt' for good sex, sex and more sex with very attractive young ladies. It was also about taking a 'body count' after 32 years of monogamy. I enjoyed experiencing sessions with a string of new ladies. There were good and there were ghostings, bait & switches and scams which made the game less than fun much of the time. So.... I started to repeat with the few ladies I favoured. Outcalls to my residence with those who I came trust became a great pastime.... wine, music, snacks and even dinners before or after events that exceeded the HH or Hr standards.

- Then, I became 'friendly' with a few ladies whom I still admire. In fact, I miss some of those who have since retired. My sessions with them became more personal as we shared life experiences, travel stories, entertainment and even more rewarding and adventurous sex. Memories of some of these, as we become older, can wonderfully populate our dreams. Life is about accumulating great memories. I, personally, was not foolish enough to 'fall in LUV', but I certainly enjoyed and suffered through highs ad lows of some 'friendships' that went beyond booked sessions I was very disappointed when these casual 'relationships' ended... sometimes when the lady retired form SW.

I think it's important to maintain some degree of perspective. Realize that the wonderful lady with whom you have built a somewhat 'special' relationship because of her beauty, wonderful personality, communication skills, always-pleasant demeanor, and sexual prowess with you... are all reasons why she is SOOOOOO successful in also achieving similar success with others. Keep in mind that your are 'unique.... just like everyone else!

Pokemon301 said:

I am donating a box of tampons and unlimited hugs to everyone who contributed to this thread

Click to expand...

Youre a big man

and

Pokemon301 said:

I am donating a box of tampons and unlimited hugs to everyone who contributed to this thread

Click to expand...

Excellent! I'm going to take my box of tampons to the women's shelter and donate them.

And the world needs more hugs.

Way to contribute my man!

Everyone has the feeling of loss after, it's primarily in the wallet.

I'm well aware that (for me) this is just for the range of experiences.
Meeting and spending intimate moments with (lovely) women that I otherwise would have only walked by on the street.

So it's casual, light fun for me.

Mind-blowing at times, yes.
But just for fun.

Go see Sky Valentine, you ll learn all about emotions

Piper1112 said:

Go see Sky Valentine, you ll learn all about emotions

Click to expand...

Link I am not from your area, but I may be this summer, so wouldn't mind checking the local scenery.