Friend with benefits dilemma

Cholla · Mar 4, 2026

Hi,
Here is a question for TERB members and I hope to get your take on that. Recently, I was contacted by a girl (via xhamster) who wanted to start a FWB relationship “to have fun”. Yes, I am not naive and I know it’s TGTBT, especially that I didn’t initiate it.

She sounded normal, but she asked me three times to switch to google chat or telegram apps to continue communication. I don’t use either, but this insistence kind of puzzled me. Is it a trick to get my personal information? I don’t know.

We never met and I would be hesitant to meet at this point. So, my question is -what it could be, a scam and a “girl” is actually a scammer? Or I am too suspicious?

Your input would be much appreciated!

A_Good_Man · Mar 4, 2026

Cholla said:
Hi,
Here is a question for TERB members and I hope to get your take on that. Recently, I was contacted by a girl (via xhamster) who wanted to start a FWB relationship “to have fun”. Yes, I am not naive and I know it’s TGTBT, especially that I didn’t initiate it.

She sounded normal, but she asked me three times to switch to google chat or telegram apps to continue communication. I don’t use either, but this insistence kind of puzzled me. Is it a trick to get my personal information? I don’t know.

We never met and I would be hesitant to meet at this point. So, my question is -what it could be, a scam and a “girl” is actually a scammer? Or I am too suspicious?

Your input would be much appreciated!

How often do women you've never met approach you to hook up? This should be the answer to your question.

Cholla · Mar 4, 2026

A_Good_Man said:
How often do women you've never met approach you to hook up? This should be the answer to your question.

Thanks, I thought so too, especially keeping in mind that she is not asking for a date yet. Still strange though.

hrnyscrp1971 · Mar 4, 2026

Cholla said:
Hi,
Here is a question for TERB members and I hope to get your take on that. Recently, I was contacted by a girl (via xhamster) who wanted to start a FWB relationship “to have fun”. Yes, I am not naive and I know it’s TGTBT, especially that I didn’t initiate it.

She sounded normal, but she asked me three times to switch to google chat or telegram apps to continue communication. I don’t use either, but this insistence kind of puzzled me. Is it a trick to get my personal information? I don’t know.

We never met and I would be hesitant to meet at this point. So, my question is -what it could be, a scam and a “girl” is actually a scammer? Or I am too suspicious?

Your input would be much appreciated!

It’s scam. She going to ask for a Apple Card or etransfer. Don’t do it

Cholla · Mar 4, 2026

hrnyscrp1971 said:
It’s scam. She going to ask for a Apple Card or etransfer. Don’t do it

Thanks!

Mr Deeds · Mar 4, 2026

A_Good_Man said:
How often do women you've never met approach you to hook up? This should be the answer to your question.

All the time im and old stud.

philonius · Mar 4, 2026

Trust your heart, you know the answer (and by that I mean continue down this path and report back what happens).

Ahri · Mar 4, 2026

If it’s too good to be true then usually it is… but this is the first time I heard about someone being approached in a porn site lol

Cholla · Mar 4, 2026

philonius said:
Trust your heart, you know the answer (and by that I mean continue down this path and report back what happens).

Thanks, but I am not sure.

Cholla · Mar 4, 2026

Ahri said:
If it’s too good to be true then usually it is… but this is the first time I heard about someone being approached in a porn site lol

Thanks, Ahri! It’s a site where people are communicating as well. I wish I just see you instead of these puzzles.

Andy Bernard · Mar 4, 2026

A_Good_Man said:
How often do women you've never met approach you to hook up? This should be the answer to your question.

From a porn site no less….

anonemouse · Mar 4, 2026

Cholla said:
She sounded normal, but she asked me three times to switch to google chat or telegram apps to continue communication. I don’t use either, but this insistence kind of puzzled me. Is it a trick to get my personal information? I don’t know.

They do it for a few reasons, but mostly cause those accounts get shut down as they approach random people and many of them flag the account as a scammer. If they move it to Telegram it doesn't matter what happens to the account on the porn site.

Cholla · Mar 4, 2026

anonemouse said:
They do it for a few reasons, but mostly cause those accounts get shut down as they approach random people and many of them flag the account as a scammer. If they move it to Telegram it doesn't matter what happens to the account on the porn site.

Really murky:.. I’d better disappear I guess although her worlds sound genuine…I could ask for meeting in person for coffee, but not sure about it. Or exchange emails? Thank you!

philonius · Mar 4, 2026

Cholla said:
Really murky:.. I’d better disappear I guess although her worlds sound genuine…I could ask for meeting in person for coffee, but not sure about it. Or exchange emails? Thank you!

It's not really murky, it's opaque. This is (and always will be) a scam.

Troubadour121 · Mar 4, 2026

A_Good_Man said:
How often do women you've never met approach you to hook up? This should be the answer to your question.

I agree with this

Cholla · Mar 4, 2026

Thank you, guys! Maybe you saved me!

kherg007 · Mar 4, 2026

Is there anything you did or say to trigger this?
Anyhow, I'm with the others, don't go further. They snap a Pic of you or get other info then blackmail you saying theyll tell everyone youve been perving on the porn sites.
I've seen on some sites where there is a Pic of a bloke and just his name.

Cholla · Mar 4, 2026

Maybe I should just block her (she’ll be angry; I guess) or simply disappear.

Y_Diner · Mar 4, 2026

Cholla said:
Hi,
Here is a question for TERB members and I hope to get your take on that. Recently, I was contacted by a girl (via xhamster) who wanted to start a FWB relationship “to have fun”. Yes, I am not naive and I know it’s TGTBT, especially that I didn’t initiate it.

She sounded normal, but she asked me three times to switch to google chat or telegram apps to continue communication. I don’t use either, but this insistence kind of puzzled me. Is it a trick to get my personal information? I don’t know.

We never met and I would be hesitant to meet at this point. So, my question is -what it could be, a scam and a “girl” is actually a scammer? Or I am too suspicious?

Your input would be much appreciated!

Ghost this person. You’re getting scammed or don’t it’s your life if they ask for you to send them money think!
It’s most likely some overweight, ugly trans man communicating with you

Y_Diner · Mar 4, 2026

Cholla said:
Maybe I should just block her (she’ll be angry; I guess) or simply disappear.

I felt really bad for you reading this last post. You’re worried that she’s gonna get angry if you block her or him.
What happened to men?

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