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Accidentally self-doxxing - Don't be a jerk

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DiscreetRocker

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We all know the drill: An escort's ad is enticing but there's not much info and no reviews, so you Google their phone number. Maybe do an image search to see if the pics are used elsewhere.

On rare occasions, my search results reveal an escort's private "civilian" identity. For example, their ad has a non-nude photo that's also on their civilian social media Facebook profile showing their real name.

When this happens, I contact them immediately to let them know. And I choose to not hire their services because I know more about them than they wanted known. In almost all cases, they're thankful I took the time to contact them about it and they take down the info that connects both private and professional identities. In some cases, they let me know they don't hide their private identity and don't care about people finding out. In rare cases, they get angry that I was "snooping" when I was just Googling info they publicly posted.

Just a reminder that as clients we have a responsibility to respect the privacy of the professionals we hire, including protecting any information they share with us or accidentally post. It's also TERB Forum Rule #1 - NO POSTING personal information, including "real names, addresses and personal social media accounts," etc. So, if you ever find this stuff DON'T SHARE IT and DON'T try to befriend them on social media. Escorts have a tough enough job and there are enough dangers out there, they don't need asshole clients making their jobs any more dangerous by sharing their personal identities.

I saw an escort get doxxed on a shitty website we don't mention here.
It's one of the reasons I don't go there anymore.
Look out for each other.
Be safe.
 
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DiscreetRocker

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You laugh at this? Odd. Two things to note:

When you see an escort's safety may be compromised because their privacy has been compromised, you choose to do nothing and find that funny. That's... revealing about your ethics.

And the concern you have about the negative consequences for you - FB recommending them as people you may know - can be easily avoided by contacting them at their professional contact info, such as phone number or email address. And if you absolutely need to use your phone then doing so with a secondary phone number not connected to your social media profile.

With such easy ways to eliminate personal consequences to ourselves, I find it strange you laugh at the idea of protecting an escort's safety.

dotdotdot69 said:
LOL...I don't contact them if I accidentally find them on social like FB and let them know. You do know if you text someone from your phone or even add them into your contacts there's a good chance on things like your FB feed they'll show up on the "People You May Know" to add. It's happened to me with quite a few people who've given me their numbers that are SPs & SBs and I don't add them to my social. And they at times still show up on my feed to add as a friend even after I've deleted their number from my phone and entire text msg. I'd ask for their social in person if I was a regular and wanted to add them. And I don't go out of my way to let them know even with a Google search I came across their real name or something...
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The Options Menu

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dotdotdot69 said:
Why would I waste time out of my day to randomly text a SP who I seen or haven't to let them know I Google reverse their image or whatever and found their real name and stuff.
Click to expand...
For a provider you've seen a quick heads up, via their work contact, would be the 'decent human' thing to do, IMO. Nobody is asking for you to do a full course on digital privacy, and you shouldn't need to be remunerated for that.

My own policy if a provider reveals something a little too personal is to try to send it down the memory hole as fast as I can. I may add a polite admonishment if it's really too much info. I can be a chatty guy, so I often end up with more personal information than I really should. I do my best to keep that out of reviews, and I otherwise try my best to not be (or be perceived as) a fucking creep.

It's nice to say a provider should know better, but not every provider is experienced, and not every provider is particularly technically savvy. A provider "learning a lesson" can be pretty deeply traumatic (when not outright dangerous). I know that from first hand experience.

Even if you're being selfish, being a 'decent human' actually serves the interests of all reasonable clients (and presumably yourself). How do you take a relatively open, good natured, and enthusiastic provider and make her closed, guarded, and badly jaded? Sprinkling on a few creeps and assholes, and some hard lessons learned, seems like a rather good way to do it. Not that I'd suggest trying to be decent for some round about gain. Often doing the right thing ends up being good for everyone, and that's not being a white knight or simp.
 
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kherg007

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I think we all need to look out for each other, be it health by avoiding unsafe practices and identifying and avoiding bad actors, or discretion, by keeping all of our info private. A lady once did send me an email but it revealed her name and I immediately told her so she was able to adjust. A similar type situation with another.
Thus I'd let a lady know if I somehow was able to determine any real stuff about her so that she can better preserve her privacy. I'd hope they would do the same for me too.
 
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onomatopoeia

onomatopoeia

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One of the photographers often hired for Escorts' professional photographs used their real first names in the file names, some years ago. This information was displayed in the browser address bar, if anyone viewed the pic as an attachment.
 
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KittyCaterina

KittyCaterina

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DiscreetRocker said:
We all know the drill: An escort's ad is enticing but there's not much info and no reviews, so you Google their phone number. Maybe do an image search to see if the pics are used elsewhere.

On rare occasions, my search results reveal an escort's private "civilian" identity. For example, their ad has a non-nude photo that's also on their civilian social media Facebook profile showing their real name.

When this happens, I contact them immediately to let them know. And I choose to not hire their services because I know more about them than they wanted known. In almost all cases, they're thankful I took the time to contact them about it and they take down the info that connects both private and professional identities. In some cases, they let me know they don't hide their private identity and don't care about people finding out. In rare cases, they get angry that I was "snooping" when I was just Googling info they publicly posted.

Just a reminder that as clients we have a responsibility to respect the privacy of the professionals we hire, including protecting any information they share with us or accidentally post. It's also TERB Forum Rule #1 - NO POSTING personal information, including "real names, addresses and personal social media accounts," etc. So, if you ever find this stuff DON'T SHARE IT and DON'T try to befriend them on social media. Escorts have a tough enough job and there are enough dangers out there, they don't need asshole clients making their jobs any more dangerous by sharing their personal identities.

I saw an escort get doxxed on a shitty website we don't mention here.
It's one of the reasons I don't go there anymore.
Look out for each other.
Be safe.
Click to expand...
Sad thing is, it isn't just clients we need to worry about doxxing us...
Other sexworkers can be just as abusive, if not more.

For example, on the shitty no-no website I am outed (along with my mother and sometimes my deceased father) a few times per week by an unhinged sexworker who has been banned here under several names too many times to count.

She found my real name which led to my mom's name and my deceased father's name under his obituary.

I'm sure many respectful gentlemen have come across my name at this point and have just left it. We sexworkers need to worry when jealous, abusive psychopaths come across our information, not the everyday happy client.
 
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onomatopoeia

onomatopoeia

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dotdotdot69 said:
... I'd say it's the ones who are your friends that could be doing stuff behind your back are a lot worse. Personally in any line of business I'm always looking into people to a certain degree and aware of my surroundings. For me when it comes down to business is if I'm hanging with my competitor I've got my hairs up. Sometimes they might hang with you to see what you're doing that's working so they can steal ideas and stuff. As a client I already know what the real good SPs would be doing to lure more. It's not that complicated to put on a charm that typically goes a long way in this line of business.
Click to expand...
1229.jpg

"Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.".
 
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