RANT: BBFS inquiries - who are these losers??

[jazzbox]

There is a certain nihilism and devil may care creeping into the industry and among punters as far as I can see. It seems people are less afraid of HIV and consider other STIs to be treatable. This is concerning enough but one has to wonder about these guys getting BBFS from providers and going home to their wife and handing them with the "gift that just keeps giving."

Some providers do allow BBFS if you are a regular. I had one very regular provider tell me to "just stick it in" since she hated condoms and was very horny. She claimed that she would only do that with me since I was a married guy (at the time). I declined her offer and stopped seeing her after that. I think she had mental heath issues and I really cared for her as a person. That was tough to take.

Seriously, why is this a thing now? Are sps everywhere offering this as a 'service'? This is just morally unsound to partake in this, even if it is a preference! Why are there SO many requests/questions regarding BBFS? Not to mention these guys will never reveal who they are. I ask them where they saw my ad and radio silence - could it be because they KNOW they shouldn't even be asking for it? Can we start a thread for blacklisting any numbers who inquire about bbfs? (Obviously they are only texters). Yes, I know there is a SP-only thread for BLACKLISTING purposes, but I felt I had to hear from both sides and am posting in general lounge to know what both sides have to say on this matter. I only advertise on certain platforms so ladies - do you find these inquiries only come from a certain platform? Feel free to PM me.

I just did a search on 'BBFS' and discovered several sps who have to advertise that they do not offer this service which just goes to show that it is requested or inquired about often enough for it to have to be on someone's ad. Seriously, WHY? I am so bothered by this as an sp coming back into the industry. This never used to happen before, and if it did it would be a huge FAUX PAS. Firstly, as an sp, if a client is asking me for bbfs I would NEVER feel safe to engage in any sexual activities with him - EW, so fking gross. It's not a judgment on wanting bbfs - but looking for it HERE? Huge turn off. This client who goes around asking for this service, im sure its a numbers game until someone or several sps say YES.

Ladies - do I literally have to put on my ad 'NO BBFS'? I thought this was common sense. Literally, COMMON sense. I understand 'consensual' on both sides. I get it, greek is a service, but it's not one I offer. But bbfs?? This is just wrong. This is coming from someone who thoroughly prefers BBFS with personal partners who I have grown comfortable/monogamous with!! It's just not safe to do so when engaging in activity with multiple partners.

In the short time I have been back I have gotten about 5-7 different numbers inquiring about BBFS. WHYYYYYYY!!!

Are people not caring as much anymore about potentially catching/spreading STIs? Are we going back to hippie ages? Is the industry changing in such a way that I missed while away for a few years?? Are people just more vocal about wanting it or more fearless about requesting it whereas before there was more common courtesy?? Is this younger people? Older people? Please - I need some light shone on this matter!!

 

[Spacealien2]

In my post I tried to address this in mentioning mental health issues.

Crazy chicks are always the best fuck

 

[SexB]

Its not just prevalent, its rampant. Always has and probably always will - you just don't hear about this underside of the business.

I joined a bbfs forum awhile ago for the specific reason of knowing who to avoid. It was shocking how many well known agency and indy SPs were listed. Of course, you have to take those reviews with a grain of salt and its all hearsay, but I have known a few regulars who told me first hand how many requests they get including the pressure from regulars. Makes you wonder. One lady who advertised on eros in NYC (now retired) told me it was almost always expected which is why many high-end ladies charge those exorbitant rates. It's unfortunate that this industry is driven by risk vs. reward with the risks to your health simply being too high. Be safe people.

I have to question the reviews on boards like that as well.

I'm guessing that a lot of them are written by disgruntled clients looking to ruin an SP's reputation.

While we're on the topic, one of the more infuriating board members I've come across are the ones who can't tell the difference between condemning it and denying it happens.

 

[Jasmina]

I am always stunned at the outrage. We all know it happens. We all know we get at least 3 inquiries a week. Block the number, post on blacklist, move on. Don't worry about what others are doing, and shaming isn't necessary. We are all adults and know the risks.

There could be any number of reasons why a provider might choose to offer it, and mental illness is probably not as high on that list as financial desperation.

What I almost NEVER see girls mention is how many guys don't ask via booking but show up and try to urge it. In SOME of those cases a provider might feel unsafe if he becomes too persistent, for example, and give it up to get him out. I don't know why we keep that a secret. It lets these creeps get away with it.

Kudos to the OP for posting so we can shed some light on the situation, though again, IF we are going to shame people, hopefully the shame gets placed where it belongs which is rarely on the provider.

 

[G.D. Gentleman]

FlorenceYi, another point to consider as 'part of' the shocking amount of inquiries you are getting.

In the last 1-2 years the advent of texting apps has exploded on all of our phones. The days of been held accountable to your cell number or the hassle of maintaining a separate 'burner phone/number' are long, long gone.

Too many idiots/creepers can now easily maintain a seperate/fake number and they get brave asking such forward and absurd requests such as bbfs.

I cannot speak to their intentions to follow through if a SP ever said yes - that has been well answered by others in this post above with their thoughts - just wanted to add the consideration of how disconnected the world has become from having a phone number being part of your identity like it was 10+ years ago.

 

[FlorenceYi]

I don't know why anyone would do this in the industry. Not only do you put your personal health at risk, but you are putting dozens of others at risk as well. As a client, you will be putting your SO at risk (if you have one), any other personal partner you have, and all the clients of the SP you are engaging in unsafe practices with, including the ones who DO engage in safer practices, as well as obviously the SP. As an SP, you are putting every single one of your clients at risk. Why? Why risk it? It's a huge gamble, and if you lose, you lose bad, and so do others.

The times I have been offered BBFS are relatively rare, but when it happens I never see that lady again. And I'm sure plenty of others do the same.

I completely agree - it's not just the one time interaction - it's a responsibility factor of being in the industry as a hobbyist and as a provider.

I tried to book a duo with well known SPs and was told by the other they ended their relationship after she found out she engaged in bbfs.
Whether it was true or just an lie, I'll never know.
Just because a girl is high end doesn't mean shit - in fact I would argue they do it more, its quick and easy money.
They can also rationalize it better given they have less partners - why not hold onto the big spenders?
NO REVIEW POLICY, what do you think that is for?

Desperation breeds this kind of behavior, you will never know for sure, but if an SP is not financially stable that would be a big red flag.
Some people can always be bought, it just a matter of price.
I don't see any real way to combat it besides refusing to partake, getting checked regularly and blacklisting. The bad apples always ruin the bunch.

Please keep AIDS to yourself.

This makes sense. Although I don't always think a 'no review policy' means necessarily desperation and all standards go out the window.. i personally have known sps who just can't handle being reviewed and talked about like a meal at a restaurant and just have had bad experiences with that in general. Yeah, I guess it may come across as a big temptation to be offerred twice or more your regular rate for bbfs, especially for those struggling financially.

Its not just prevalent, its rampant. Always has and probably always will - you just don't hear about this underside of the business.

I joined a bbfs forum awhile ago for the specific reason of knowing who to avoid. It was shocking how many well known agency and indy SPs were listed. Of course, you have to take those reviews with a grain of salt and its all hearsay, but I have known a few regulars who told me first hand how many requests they get including the pressure from regulars. Makes you wonder. One lady who advertised on eros in NYC (now retired) told me it was almost always expected which is why many high-end ladies charge those exorbitant rates. It's unfortunate that this industry is driven by risk vs. reward with the risks to your health simply being too high. Be safe people.

Okay, so there actually is a forum for this?! Gee, this makes more sense now.. I always equated bbfs as something to do with personal partners, between regular testings if you switch partners.. I've never met any other sp who spoke of this as a common occurence, which is why this is a surprise to me.. in my dozen years of being in and out of the industry i've met a few dozen other sps.. not that we had very meaningful or in depth conversations but I had assumed that was a big no-no.

Chinatown is usually a $20 upgrade
$500 is pretty steep

wow. enlightening.

I'm guessing if you ask enough SPs and you offer enough money, you're bound to find ones that will say yes to BBFS. Then there's the guys who practice "stealthing" while changing positions. There's a lot of stupid people in this world, both men and women. Don't try to figure them out.

so there is a term for this shenanigan. I do not enjoy guys who do this, they force me to put on a cute smile and coyly say 'oops, thats not supposed to happen!!' while grabbing hold of their dick and guiding it away from the poon. they go on my mental blacklist.

Sorry, not getting it! Why is the 'BBFS' thing suddenly such a SHOCKER???

Never really been into the escort circuit, always been more a stripper, spa-girl, shemale, domina/femdom guy, so maybe I'm totally missing something.

Glossing over threads over the years . . . . . .

20 YRS AGO - CBJ
15 YRS AGO - BBBJ
10 YRS AGO - BBBJTC
_5 YRS AGO - BBBJTCWS

TODAY - BB_______


______________________________________________________________________________________________________

What is bbbjtc and bbbjtcws lol

People do all kinds of things with dismissing the potential consequences as they don't think that far ahead.

Texting and driving, spending more money than they earn, gambling, smoking etc etc.

Absolutely.. I suppose this is just another choice for a person to make.. and who am I to judge? Die any way you want lol. But like, I really don't understand the risk reward.. gambling you can stand to win a bunch of money.. smoking you get immediate stress relief and it will be years before you get lung cancer.. what risk reward is there from engaging in bbfs.. a better one-time cum?? the risk is immediate HIV and being on meds for the rest of your life, and the stigma of that. seriously.. unless if you cant find someone to be intimate with on a personal level.. but even then!! subjective placement of values then. and based on this, i should never be behind a wheel lol.

The frequency of the request should suggest to you that the practice is more common than you think and that you possibly have already serviced customers who are doing this with other sexworkers. Reasons why providers might do it maybe because of competition, substance abuse problems, mental health issues, ignorance or they are at a health status where they feel it does not matter anymore and similar parallels can be drawn for the behaviour of their customers. Obviously some people will never ever do this but others have their own filters and justifications for doing this.
For as a provider to be astonished about this is itself astonishing especially if you are seeing a diverse clientele. The world is a very big where anything goes.

Yeah.. that's what I was thinking. Well, I never had these types of requests as often as they are coming, just a few years ago. I remember being asked for bbfs maybe like.. less than 10 times within 5 total years I was an sp.. now it's almost that much in a span of a month! The one thing I do see a difference with is now that I am accepting texting as a first-mode of communication - that is where all those bbfs requests come from. Clients who send an email of introduction never ask about bbfs, so far as Ive experienced.

Well...self regulation of the industry is key, if it wishes to be left alone. If an epidemic or something like that happens, the federales will jump in and it will all come a guster....(i.e., they'll come down on everyone - clients and sp's - like a ton of bricks). So all parties bear responsibility here.

This is exactly right! I love being an escort in Toronto. Legal, can command great rates, love this city, and generally don't have to worry about safety. Would hate for our industry to change for the worse due to this irresponsibility on both sides.. I wonder what happens in cities where it is completely legal sex trade such as amsterdam, I know girls have to have regular testing done to show to any workplace - but what about the johns? To be a client do they have to also undergo testing? Or is bbfs not offered in those places that are more regulated?

 

[FlorenceYi]

FlorenceYi, another point to consider as 'part of' the shocking amount of inquiries you are getting.

In the last 1-2 years the advent of texting apps has exploded on all of our phones. The days of been held accountable to your cell number or the hassle of maintaining a separate 'burner phone/number' are long, long gone.

Too many idiots/creepers can now easily maintain a seperate/fake number and they get brave asking such forward and absurd requests such as bbfs.

I cannot speak to their intentions to follow through if a SP ever said yes - that has been well answered by others in this post above with their thoughts - just wanted to add the consideration of how disconnected the world has become from having a phone number being part of your identity like it was 10+ years ago.

An impeccable observation here.. perhaps I can ready a dick picture as a suitable response to any bbfs inquiries.. haha!

 

[thumper18474]

What is bbbjtc and bbbjtcws lol

BBBJTC...Bare Back Blow Job To Completion....
BBBJTCWS..Bare Back Blow Job ToCompletion With Swallowing

 

[FlorenceYi]

What is bbbjtc and bbbjtcws lol

BBBJTC...Bare Back Blow Job To Completion....
BBBJTCWS..Bare Back Blow Job ToCompletion With Swallowing

Thanks thumper. But why would anyone give a bbbj without a completion?! That's just mean! OH I understand.. as opposed to finishing with full service. Got it. lol.

 

[luvyeah]

An impeccable observation here.. perhaps I can ready a dick picture as a suitable response to any bbfs inquiries.. haha!

I love this idea.
Any bbfs request you can promptly respond with visuals of what happens when you don't care about playing safe. A nice shock factor seems to be a good educator. People think unsolicited dick pics are bad, how about one with worts, ulcers, puss and bleeding, just to reinforce how fun bbfs can be.

 

[FlorenceYi]

I love this idea.
Any bbfs request you can promptly respond with visuals of what happens when you don't care about your safety. A nice shock factor seems to be a good educator.

Oh I wasn't thinking of going that far as to send a picture of an infected penis! You are evil... I like.

 

[Smallcock]

Just because a girl is high end doesn't mean shit - in fact I would argue they do it more, its quick and easy money.
They can also rationalize it better given they have less partners - why not hold onto the big spenders?
NO REVIEW POLICY, what do you think that is for?

I agree that it's probably most common among SPs that charge higher-than-average industry rates.

 

[rhuarc29]

I am always stunned at the outrage. We all know it happens. We all know we get at least 3 inquiries a week. Block the number, post on blacklist, move on. Don't worry about what others are doing, and shaming isn't necessary. We are all adults and know the risks.

I'd agree with that mindset if only two people were involved. However, that is not the case. An SP who chooses to risk her own health by doing BBFS, also exposes all her other clients -- most likely without ever informing them -- even if said clients only engage in safer practices. Same goes for clients; they're exposing the SP's clients and their own SO (if they have one).

 

[John Wick]

The bigger laugh is that some of the most frequent stealth providers of BBFS are the very same, very well known, and highly visible Twitter stars who are so ardently feminist advocates of misandry out there. The fact is, money talks, and if you are a high value regular, with competition being what is it, and with so many of these women publicly livin' large but privately barely getting by, unless there are obvious signs of infection, they are almost ALL offering it to keep the customer happy and returning. In other words, they will do it for no other reason than to keep the money flowing and the lights on. Health risk is in truth and in fact a very low priority business concern ranking far far below financial viability and personal security and protection from violence.

 

[lomotil]

Oh I wasn't thinking of going that far as to send a picture of an infected penis! You are evil... I like.

Arguably, for every "loser" inquiring about bbfs there is a "loser" providing it. It is the wild west out there and there is no sheriff.

 

[Jasmina]

If you are indulging in visiting sex workers you are already taking risks no matter how "safe" you think you are being. You can contract herpes and gonorrhea from kissing. And chlamydia can be contracted even if you use a dome.

I'd agree with that mindset if only two people were involved. However, that is not the case. An SP who chooses to risk her own health by doing BBFS, also exposes all her other clients -- most likely without ever informing them -- even if said clients only engage in safer practices. Same goes for clients; they're exposing the SP's clients and their own SO (if they have one).

 

[silentkisser]

I don't understand this request either. For a number of reasons. It reminds me of the TV show Scandal. In the first episode (and the only one I've watched), they looking at an escort agency for some reason. But they used codes for what the girls provided for their very high-end clients, including no rain coat. And I thought to myself, there is no way a high class escort would allow BBFS for so many reasons, and I also doubted the clients would as well...

 

[Jasmine Raine]

I'm guessing if you ask enough SPs and you offer enough money, you're bound to find ones that will say yes to BBFS. Then there's the guys who practice "stealthing" while changing positions. There's a lot of stupid people in this world, both men and women. Don't try to figure them out.

Raping. The word you are looking for is raping women. That is what "stealthing" is.

I like to use real terms instead of light hearted ones. Stealthing sounds cool. Raping does not.


As for the requests for BBFS, I have found that since I don't post a number in my ads and contact can only be made via forms on my websites, I don't get requests for them. I don't get pressure from anyone actually. I will knock on wood and consider myself lucky. I would be disheartened if I got that request a lot.

 

[The Options Menu]

If you are indulging in visiting sex workers you are already taking risks no matter how "safe" you think you are being. You can contract herpes and gonorrhea from kissing. And chlamydia can be contracted even if you use a dome.

Just because you can get hit by a car crossing the street doesn't mean you should close your eyes and walk into traffic. Inform yourself (ideally with scientifically rigorous data), know your tolerance for risk, know what you have at stake, and then make your decisions.

 

[Jasmina]

How? As already been pointed out, you cannot simply trust the word of what could, for all you know, be a disgruntled ex client, non-client who DIDNT get bbfs, ex boyfriend (happens more than you know), etc, etc.

And just because a provider is NOT listed on the bbfs boards, doesn't equally mean she is clean. That's a ridiculous idea.

My point being, you are taking that risk with ANY call you make.

Just because you can get hit by a car crossing the street doesn't mean you should close your eyes and walk into traffic. Inform yourself (ideally with scientifically rigorous data), know your tolerance for risk, know what you have at stake, and then make your decisions.