The Porn Dude

My first drive by pickup ends in handjob

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onthebottom

Never Been Justly Banned
Jan 10, 2002
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Hooterville
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Why do I think he rubbed one out while watching a chick run towards the Eaton centre.....

OTB
 

HetroGuy

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Apr 6, 2010
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Hate to break it to you HetroGuy, but Megan Fox and Jessica Alba are two of the easiest women around... I also scored with both of them during TIFF, but I didn't have to lower myself to your level. For guys who prefer a more understated approach to picking up women, I highly recommend a book by famed author Les Nessman called The Timid Man's Guide to Getting Sloppy Seconds from Hot B-List Celebrities.
Of course Les Nessman ... it's always the quiet ones ..
 

afterhours

New member
Jul 14, 2009
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Either that is a lie or you got a HJ from this one:

if a girl was having a 20 minute walk towards Eatons at 10pm chances are she does not belong to the most affluent circles

praying on the vulnerable rules :)
 

simon482

internets icon
Feb 8, 2009
9,965
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i am thinking we need a petition or something to get the wave hello changed to a handjob.
 

hairyfucker

Turgid Member
Sep 10, 2005
1,549
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Hate to break it to you HetroGuy, but Megan Fox and Jessica Alba are two of the easiest women around... I also scored with both of them during TIFF, but I didn't have to lower myself to your level. For guys who prefer a more understated approach to picking up women, I highly recommend a book by famed author Les Nessman called The Timid Man's Guide to Getting Sloppy Seconds from Hot B-List Celebrities.
Happy Hairy Hardon Humps a Horny Hetro who Happens to Have Heavy Hooters.

Thats the book I'm gonna read.
 

cute-bald

Banned
Nov 14, 2005
1,280
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YAH, the driving around trying to get random girls to take a ride is a BIG heat score!!! BUT... I told you guys on another thread what I did 12 years ago. Walking around down town in & around Eaton Center. Found good looking girls who where on their own, asked if they would be interested in some easy money. If they stopped & seemed curious then I would say I thought they looked hot & asked if they are adventurious enough to assist in my fantasy of randomly asking a hot girl on the street to hook-up & have some fun. I put it that way so it came off as less creepy & just a wild, fun, crazy, spontanious thing to do. SURE , out of 20, 15 said no thanks, with a tone that it was kinda crazy in a funny way. OK, so they may of thought I was a downtown nut-case. BUT it did not disturb them too much because lots of wierdos wandering downtown..... they kinda' expect that. BUT, BUT, BUT..... 5 hot girls went for it & for a measly 100 bucks had great sex. TOTAL thrill ...... & for them too!!! Before I fly out to Germany if any guys want to team up & do it message me. We could say we are a couple of guys visiting from out of town & have a hotel room. Plus may be easier to get 2 girl friends. They probably will feel safer & more likely to do it.
 

Ceiling Cat

Well-known member
Feb 25, 2009
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C.B. Can I drive you to the airport?????? Auf wiedersehen
 

The Saint

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Jun 17, 2010
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What a co incident!! I was driving on Steels near the pacific mall on my motor cycle behind a bus.At the next stop 376 young good looking Chinese girls got on the bus but there wasn't room for that many so one had to get off and wait for the next bus,as the bus left I pulled up and using international hand language ($40.00) asked her if she would exchange a nude reverse with happy ending for a ride.She took my money quickly which is Chinese for yes and hopped on. She was jackhammering me like there was no tomorrow as we flew along Steels,when all of a sudden I shot the mother of all loads!! the wind caught it and totally covered my visor!! I couldn,t see,I hit the brakes but she wasn't ready for this and flew off with my dick still firmly in her grip!...... She died! and they burried her with my dick still in her right hand,....and now I have to go through life dickless using mt tongue to give pleasure to all the young women I can but to this day I can't eat chinese without remembering my last handjob!
 

Back Burner

In Protest! See Location!
What a co incident!! I was driving on Steels near the pacific mall on my motor cycle behind a bus.At the next stop 376 young good looking Chinese girls got on the bus but there wasn't room for that many so one had to get off and wait for the next bus,as the bus left I pulled up and using international hand language ($40.00) asked her if she would exchange a nude reverse with happy ending for a ride.She took my money quickly which is Chinese for yes and hopped on. She was jackhammering me like there was no tomorrow as we flew along Steels,when all of a sudden I shot the mother of all loads!! the wind caught it and totally covered my visor!! I couldn,t see,I hit the brakes but she wasn't ready for this and flew off with my dick still firmly in her grip!...... She died! and they burried her with my dick still in her right hand,....and now I have to go through life dickless using mt tongue to give pleasure to all the young women I can but to this day I can't eat chinese without remembering my last handjob!

Hey, did she work at Taco Bell?

i believe that both Zardoz and Back burner are full of shit and making it all up..
What!!!? How dare you!!

Well how about I tell you my Great Canadian Handjob at Harvey's story?
 

Questor

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Sep 15, 2001
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Why would you get 7 or 8 women to decline politely for such a generous offer ? 20 minutes walk from Eaton's Centre - I'm guessing the Jarvis / St Charles area ? They do have ladies walking that neighborhood.

Now if you drove her the distance that it would have taken her to walk in 20 minutes - I'm guessing you still have a little friction burn from that HJ or lucked out at a lot of lights.

You know I believe this guy - women love a guy who takes command is sexually aggressive. It was documented by an author most guys would know little about named Herb Tarlek who worked a radio station before he wrote the Macho Man's Bible to Getting Laid By Hot Chicks. Basically he wrote that hot women are sick of the sympathetic sensitive man and prefer a macho man who can never hear the word 'No'.

I guess I can back up Zardoz story because the same thing happened to me during TIFF. So I'm cruising the downtown theatre district airing out my big erect dick. Oh, a few woman and children ran away but eventually a tall hottie not only didn't run away but came over to talk to me. I said something cool 'hey babe - you keep walking with those tits bouncing like that and you will get a ticket for looking like a street slut. She laughed at my wit .. then looked at me and my dick ... you know guys are afraid to approach me because I'm so hot but you .. you are a man and treat me like a woman.

Next thing I know she has yanked the rusty Tercel door open and jumped in beside me - but not before I see in the flickering dome light that it was none other than Megan Fox. She was on her way to her husband but obviously was not going to give up a shot at a jackpot for some wimpy girly man. She was stroking me slowly and I was going to pull off to this great spot behind the Harvey's on Jarvis when I almost got cut off by a Taxi. I told Megan 'sit' & 'stay girl' which touched off an involuntary orgasm causing her to gasp as she watched her man leave the Tercel to confront the Taxi. As the fare got out the female taxi driver started to open the door when she saw my erect penis. I said something like why risk a ticket when you can just give me your number and I might call later? She smiled 'macho hunks like you are rare' giving me her card. I was about to join Megan when a hesitate sexy voice said ' hey you - room in that car for one more?' It was Jessica Alba cradling a one year old child. 'I really need you !' she whispered. What about the kid ? She leaned into the taxi, put the kid in and gave the driver some money. 'What kid ?' We both smiled and headed back to the Tercel and 7 minutes of eternal bliss.

I discovered that when women see your naked penis in the car - they know they have found a macho guy who isn't pussy footing around. BTW: For those that believe me and want to hear me tell you more stuff that will never help your dismal lives - I am holding courses.
Wow! Amazing! What are the chances? Jessica Alba and Megan Fox on the same night. I'm going to try that tonight. I'll give you all a report tomorrow.

This place is a gold mine for info on how to pick up chicks.

P.S. I'm 68 years old. Do you think that will affect my success rate?
 

zardoz

Banned
Apr 6, 2010
420
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toronto
I don't buy it CB. What kind of women would go for someone SHORT and BALD like you? even for $100? They must be really short and fat, maybe teenagers who want ipod fund. Did you check their ID before you did with them? Maybe after you come back from Germany, you can try approaching ADULT women, I'd like to see you do it. Maybe I can learn something from you, since 5 / 20 is a very good ratio for street game.

As for the rest of you, you can continue mentally masterbate since none of you will ever have enough guts to try it out yourself. Just stick with the pros it's a lot easier and safer, you just have to close your eyes and imagine they are regular women.
 

red

you must be fk'n kid'g me
Nov 13, 2001
17,569
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all i know is, I am going to make sure the girl at taco bell washes her hands before she hands me my taco
 

danmand

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Nov 28, 2003
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zardoz

Banned
Apr 6, 2010
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toronto
Nope, GotGusto posted a macabre story about watching some girl leave a party/bar and ending up decapitated in a car accident. Sex with the body etc.

Searched and looks like the thread got deleted.

Seriously creeped me out and haunts me every time I see that monkey in his sig line.

LOT'S of sick fucks here...
GoGusto also posted numerous times about having bbfs with pro SPs even if she is likely to have STD. Not long ago, he was complaining about burning sensation while peeing...
 
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