La Villa Spa

Dating in mid 40's as a single man

CH812

Active member
May 15, 2004
213
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Medellin, Colombia
Where do single men in their mid 40's go these days to meet women? I dont feel comfortable anymore in the nightlife scene so what are my options? Not interested in online dating either
 

xix

Time Zone Traveller
Jul 27, 2002
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La la land
Yoga
Tai Chi
12 step program AA ( Narcissist some of them)
Gym - A joke, but then again I seen some get lucky if you are honest.
Do an Art class near by.
Walking - say hello.
Meetup dot com

EDIT: Public Library - it has programs for a day or night.
2024-09-01-233pm

It surprises me a lot, that many people cannot say a simple " Hello" to a stranger
 
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CH812

Active member
May 15, 2004
213
26
28
Medellin, Colombia
I work full time remotely as well which really limits my outings and the opportunities I have to meet women so its almost like there are no options these days except for dating apps which I detest
 

Robert Mugabe

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2017
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I remember when I finally broke out of a 10 year live in "relationship" and was in my early 40's. Found myself in a "Saturday night and I ain't got nobody" situation, to quote Cat Stevens, or Sam Cooke...
Anyway I got gussied up and went to yon disco. Where everybody was 20 years younger than me. Clued in I'd missed that boat.
30 years later, things haven't improved that much....read as AT ALL.
Need some "work on myself time, methinks. Put that "it's never too late" adage to the test. lol.
Kinda got to the point with women of "why am I alone? I don't understand" to "actually...you're right"
 
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Cbr20152012

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Aug 7, 2023
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In my experience, dating in your 40s is disturbingly easy. It’s a decade where a man has incredible range to attract from. My experience has been Women in their 20s up to women in their 50s.

Either get comfortable with online dating or learn how to talk to strangers. If you aren’t naturally outgoing and chatty - smart to just get comfy with online dating.

Shift focus from clubs to cocktail bars.
Intro running clubs or similar idea
Yoga/barre/pilates etc - but gym date can be cringy
Art class or similar hobby
Work

if doing an activity/hobby/class - smart to look for a friend (vs a gf)and then date her friends. Easier that way. More efficient and likely more effective. Essentially, the same effort will get you a greater range of women to date. Just don’t f**k it up by being a jerk to her friends.
 

kittykellykat

Kelly @ Secret Escorts
Jun 15, 2023
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CH812

Active member
May 15, 2004
213
26
28
Medellin, Colombia

This way you can get fit and avoid fatties lol. Idk when the next one is but I might check it out.
Something like this I would for sure checkout. For sure it beats the gym
 
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DesRicardo

aka Dick Dastardly
Dec 2, 2022
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Volunteer work.
A club that targets the older crowds.
If you are serious about a relationship, Church.
Buy a dog and go to a dog park.
Go to a restaurant or a mall out of town.

I'll throw Starbucks in the mix, but your game has to be top notch.
 
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kittykellykat

Kelly @ Secret Escorts
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TIFF is coming up for older crowd parties, last call is super late too. My friends and I always used to go to be starfuckers when we weren’t even remotely old enough so you might even meet a much younger girl but in an age appropriate environment LOL

Oh and I agree with the church suggestion above. I’ll keep you in my prayers haha
 

Cbr20152012

Well-known member
Aug 7, 2023
544
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Volunteer work.
A club that targets the older crowds.
If you are serious about a relationship, Church.
Buy a dog and go to a dog park.
Go to a restaurant or a mall out of town.

I'll throw Starbucks in the mix, but your game has to be top notch.
Dog and church are serious suggestions but they would both work. Excellent comments.
 
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sharty

Member
Jun 1, 2024
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It usually happens when you least expect it. I went to a 3 week job in a northern Ontario town 20 some years ago, wanted to leave immediately. Walked into the local bar and a beautiful girl was working there, I was smitten. Circumstances made nothing come of it but it was the last place I expected it.

Grocery stores, Michaels craft store, homesense, these places are crawling with chicks. Girls in bars are all dolled up and have their guards up thinking they're hotter than they actually are due to excessive make up. Try to catch one you fancy in the frozen food aisle and tell her to leave before she melts all the food.
 

xix

Time Zone Traveller
Jul 27, 2002
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La la land
A buddy of mine is attending this - if you are interested.

Interesting.
It reminds me of meetup-com where "it is mostly women" that arrange or create event nights, in my local area it was Cinema night On Wednesdays in my area. Then the facilitator or organizer ends up dating my associate which lasted like 4 months. The group disbanded after 3 months. Not many different movies were coming out.
 
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barnacler

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May 13, 2013
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It usually happens when you least expect it. I went to a 3 week job in a northern Ontario town 20 some years ago, wanted to leave immediately. Walked into the local bar and a beautiful girl was working there, I was smitten. Circumstances made nothing come of it but it was the last place I expected it.

Grocery stores, Michaels craft store, homesense, these places are crawling with chicks. Girls in bars are all dolled up and have their guards up thinking they're hotter than they actually are due to excessive make up. Try to catch one you fancy in the frozen food aisle and tell her to leave before she melts all the food.
You are dead on about the decorating or craft places. I would get a map of all Homesense locations, - then ask their advice about something.

The problem with going after staff at any location is they HAVE to be nice to you, so it can be fake. But not customers.
 
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Jenesis

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Jul 14, 2020
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Do random pick-ups at craft stores actually work though??? I know so many women who would actually be turned off by being approached while shopping. Maybe I hang with a different a crowd. I mean sure there are plenty of women there but other then some simple light chitchat, does anything actually come out of it?
 
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opieshuffle

Active member
Oct 30, 2004
370
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Volleyball at Ashbridges Bay through the summer. A bit late now, but find a team. I swear it's one huge meet-up and I've made this suggestion to others resulting in 100% success in dating for them. All ages, shapes and sizes!
Find a co-ed pick up soccer (pick any sport) league. Seriously... anything sports related.
 
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