The argument for legalization is really an argument about power.. giving more power and protection to the sex worker is a good thing, It will protect them from being taken advantage of financially ,physically etc..( ie lots of Sw s complain about customers trying to secretly videotape them... but they are afraid to do anything about it given their powerlessness legally ) Legalization will not necessarily create societal acceptance... (Look at the abortion issue). Societal acceptance turns on many things such as religion, marriage etc which change with time and formulate our accepted morals. I believe that at one level when more power comes to the SW so will be visibility ,more openness and more people will understand their role...and ( i believe) more acceptance will happen.
Stigma of the sex worker
- Thread starter Lickylick
- Start date
Stop hiding behind "you don't know me!" like a teen delinquent on an episode of Dr. Phil. Nobody cares who you are. You're being judged on what you've said in this thread, not on who people think you are.
Oh, you're here to inform? Are you a sex worker? No? Well, are you an academic, then? No? Policy maker? Still no? Just an arrogant dude on the internet with unfounded opinions (that actual sex workers largely disagree with)? Ah, cool.
The levels of violence/stigmatization faces by clients and providers are not comparable. Any time a client brings this up they're telling on themselves.
Source? Where did you find this statistic? Oh, you made it up? Ah, cool.
lol, no. Stop self-mythologizing.
Who asked you to expose yourself? Why do you keep making this about you?
The stigma faced by clients is mostly irrelevant to our lives. We don't tell anyone we're clients and we don't face any obstacles. Also, weird move to throw a random grievance in there about "blurry face pics". Why do you care if SWs are proud of their job?
If you're in favour of regulation and licensing you're anti-sex worker. There's a reason the majority of sex workers want decrim. I believe the reasons why were discussed in another recent-ish thread, in which you participated, so if you play dumb I'll be looking that up for you.
I’m not sure if decriminalizing sex work will erase the stigma but it can definitely do a lot of good! Stigma is something my colleagues and I talk about constantly, my personal view is that if isn’t an issue for me than it shouldn’t be an issue for you. I know that’s easier said than done and will always respect that people have the right to think want they want.
How I have been going around challenging the stigma is just to be completely transparent about what I do, in my personal interactions with people outside is the sw world, (I.e friends, family, work etc). I just tell it to them how it is as I think the fact that I don’t act ashamed of what I do (not that anyone should be), and am actually Nonchalant about it might actually cause them to reassess and think about it. I take every opportunity to explain and educate about what I think the industry is about. Yeah there’s certain things like services etc! BUT it’s natural for humans wanting experience each other! It’s building a connection, a rapport, intimacy and being vulnerable, it’s being able to freely explore a side of yourself without fear of being judged!!
I always tell people this work has done so much for me. Not just fiscally speaking but breaking down my perception on age, and discovering my own sexuality and creating amazing bonds with both clients and fellow workers. I have found that voicing these aspects as well as being open and upfront has had a positive impact on how people view my as a member of the industry and the industry itself.
I know everyone’s case is different but I truly think if people were less afraid of what people would think of them and took the chance of being open and upfront it could really change things. It’s not up to laws but the people themselves. If you keep treating it as taboo nothing will change. This is just my humble opinion. Xox no disrespect intended!
How I have been going around challenging the stigma is just to be completely transparent about what I do, in my personal interactions with people outside is the sw world, (I.e friends, family, work etc). I just tell it to them how it is as I think the fact that I don’t act ashamed of what I do (not that anyone should be), and am actually Nonchalant about it might actually cause them to reassess and think about it. I take every opportunity to explain and educate about what I think the industry is about. Yeah there’s certain things like services etc! BUT it’s natural for humans wanting experience each other! It’s building a connection, a rapport, intimacy and being vulnerable, it’s being able to freely explore a side of yourself without fear of being judged!!
I always tell people this work has done so much for me. Not just fiscally speaking but breaking down my perception on age, and discovering my own sexuality and creating amazing bonds with both clients and fellow workers. I have found that voicing these aspects as well as being open and upfront has had a positive impact on how people view my as a member of the industry and the industry itself.
I know everyone’s case is different but I truly think if people were less afraid of what people would think of them and took the chance of being open and upfront it could really change things. It’s not up to laws but the people themselves. If you keep treating it as taboo nothing will change. This is just my humble opinion. Xox no disrespect intended!
I admire your strength and conviction. I think in general we underestimate most peoples ability to be understanding and compassionate... good on you to actually walk the walk. Legalization will give you much needed power against the minority of creeps in this business.
Maddie...
Thanks for the thoughtful and eloquently-written response
You write from an insider's perspective and allow suitors an insight into the feminine mystique.
Looking forward to more of your posts
Buddy, you do realize that sex workers hide behind blurry photos BECAUSE of the stigma and the fact that they can be murdered for being open about their work, right? Like, you do realize that's why, not because they're ashamed but because the stigma has forced them to have to hide out of fear. I'm face out only because I'm lucky to have family and friends I know would support me, there are SO MANY cases of sex workers who get murdered, disowned, assaulted or commit suicide after they get outted.
And don't even try and paint it as if clients face anywhere close to the same amount of violence, it's not even in the same ballpark.
So your point of starting this thread was to......just state your opinion on the matter? You wanted your soapbox moment?
Your disrespect and distaste for sex workers is potent, I can smell it from here.
For sure he and few others are back. I know for a fact that there's a group of guys that got banned from terb and now they are groupies on discord. I have been informed they are back here under different names. They also enjoy fake booking girls and do it continuously if they think a girls prices are too much or if they just don't like them. So, with that being said, he and the others, are not supportive of sex workers when they behave the way that they do and brag about fucking a girl for cheap in their private discord chat and bbfs'ing girls & creampie'ing them like whiteman likes to brag about in the private chat. That is not being supportive imo, that is slobbyist behaviour. I won't name anymore names but i'm sure you can figure out who the other banned members are.
So while those banned members like to create threads such as this, "stigma of a sex worker" those are the types of people who aren't supportive at all of sex workers. just by visiting them doesn't make them supportive as they like to imagine. Their behaviour is abhorrent, and how they talk about sex workers in their private little group chat is quite despicable.
And here's the thing, this IS an interesting topic to discuss! But you didn't start this thread to have discourse on the topic, as you clearly said yourself and have also shown by you shutting down and getting upset at anyone who disagrees or corrects you.
Again, you need to learn to have an open mind if you want to start conversations like this - your opinion isn't facts and isn't more important than anyone else's on here.
You need to look at the world around you.
Again your assuming I'm not a sex worker this is a billion dollar industry with many different facets from manufacturing of sex toys, therapists, strippers, escorts, dj's, bartenders, drivers, and there are more. I could hold any of those positions, I think you need to take of your rose colored glasses and shut up. make a contribution instead of attacking.
The level of violence is comparable if you think otherwise you must be a provider in disguise.
My source is the reality will live in now and the knowledge to read and write and where to find the information. The information is out there in a place call the World Wide Web also know as the information highway, you just have to ask the right questions and not just attack other people because there threads don't meet your approval.
I believe Amber Glory said I should.
I believe Amber Glory said I should. Again try reading everything and not what you don't agree with.
The fact that you keep your activities to yourself is proof that stigma is a factor, and relevant in your life, you keep it a secret for fear of being stigmatized.
Not a weird or out of place statement why should I expose myself as a supporter like Amber suggest, when woman in the industry hide their identity.
You understand that with decriminalization, regulations follow, comparable example weed, alcohol, gambling all decriminalized but heavily regulated. Licensing will hell weed out those being forced to into the industry. The only people who don't want it are the criminal element that thrives in this industry. I am not anti sex worker. I am anti criminal. "locks are meant to keep honest people out." Laws and regulations are meant to keep honest people in check.
I think there is a condition for what you have its called verbal diarrhea. if insulting people is your form of discussing you really need to get a new way of life, you must be a horrible person to live with if your the only one allowed to have an opinion.
I have reported you and your posts speak for themselves you are a nasty individual who can only insult people and not converse like others.
Thank you for your contribution and your points view. One cannot stand tall if they allow the burdens of life to weigh them down.
Well, in that case, what if it were moved to The Lounge and there was a sticky post (or something like that) in the Ottawa 411 that pointed/linked/shortcutted to the main thread? Ottawa TERBites would still see it but participation is actually in the main thread. Shortcuts could be added in other regions' 411 forums. Then you'd get more diversity of opinion, for sure. But maybe OP thinks only Ottawa area SWs have these issues?
I have not been banned in the past and this thread is just that a topic of conversation. For you to say I am not supportive is an insult cause you and I have met numerous times over the years and our sessions have always been great. if visiting providers is not supportive then i am wasting my donations.
Wasting your donations??? Did you have sex (and/or physical intimacy and/or conversations)? Then the transaction went off successfully and you got what you wanted. The phrase "donation" is a euphemism designed to avoid legal scrutiny; seeing escorts is not public service or a political act. Trying to spin the satisfaction of your personal desires as an act of altruism is disgusting and sad.
You quoted me on my from reply #34 why not included it, cause it puts my comment in context and you cant insult me if the context of my reply makes sense. My point is very obvious when a client visits a providers and pays her fee or donations, consideration, the client is supporting the provider he visits. Just like when a customer spends money at a business he is supporting that business.
Again you are very insulting and really hope your accounts are banned. You must have saddle sores the size of a football.
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I think thread should have ended with this. It's only to inform as OP said.
A moot thread. Basically informing us, it's all just status quo.
Time to lock it up.
Why I think people are allowed to view their opinion on this subject. Other then a certain person who needs not be named, everyone seems to sharing their opinions like civilized people. If you don't choose to join the conversation doesn't give you the right to say shut it down.
If more people had the same mindset it would be a better world.Maddie takes the high road. She leads by example and influences others
She's a leader on TERB and in life
I think we need a section in the Ottawa sector to help keep the topics local and close to home.
